Sarah Bays

speaker

910 appearances 2 recordings 1 series first heard Jun 2026 last heard 26 Jun

Sarah Bays’s voice in public audio — every appearance, attributed to the second.

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recordings per month · last 12 months

Recordings per month over the last 12 months — 2 in all, peaking in Jun 2026 with 2.

Appearances

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But Are You Happy? · Catching Feelings In Your Situationship? We Got You. · 5 Jun 2026 podcast

If I'm too stuck in my shame, I'm just beating myself up and I'm not learning anything.

Yeah.

And I want to learn from things and hopefully not have it repeat.

Or at least if it is repeating, I might be aware a bit earlier in the piece.

Yeah.

So, yeah, getting curious around what were the things that I missed?

What were the things that maybe I could have missed?

done so maybe asked for more clarity or communicated in a way that really was more upfront in the beginning or you know not let my needs kind of be secondary so there are things that I might have contributed to this in a non-self-blaming way it's just this was my part in that interaction yeah and

And then the other side is that also, you know, if someone doesn't treat us well, it's interesting that I feel ashamed about that.

That's their shame.

And they may not be ashamed of themselves.

And that's fine.

But actually, I'm carrying the shame for someone else's behavior.

Yeah.

Wow.

Do you find that's a very common thing?

Yeah, particularly with, you know, abuse and things like that.

It's often the person who's been the recipient of abuse who feels in some way really ashamed of themselves.

And it's, you know, it's a very deep wound to try and work through.

But really it's when one person is acting so shamelessly

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