Stephen Colbert
👤 SpeakerAppearances Over Time
Podcast Appearances
What so proudly we take it, take it.
In fact, it's 82 degrees and it's sunny.
Nearly 200 million Americans are now in the path of a dangerous winter storm system, with warnings and alerts now stretching from the Mexican border all the way to Maine.
Nowhere is harder hit than Texas, where more than 3 million homes and businesses are without power and heat.
The electrical grid simply can't handle the demand.
I couldn't imagine somebody like Osama bin Laden understanding the joy of Hanukkah.
I feel, as Cheryl shared with you, a very special connection to Israel when I first visited the Holy Land.
Can't say I do, John. There's a fundamental hypocrisy at work here. Our society says if you're 18, you're old enough to vote or to die for your country. If you're old enough to do those things, you're certainly old enough to toss a ball through a basket for enough money to forever skew your view of reality.
Can't say I do, John. There's a fundamental hypocrisy at work here. Our society says if you're 18, you're old enough to vote or to die for your country. If you're old enough to do those things, you're certainly old enough to toss a ball through a basket for enough money to forever skew your view of reality.
If you're old enough to get into a PG-13 movie, you should be allowed to play the hoops.
If you're old enough to get into a PG-13 movie, you should be allowed to play the hoops.
All right, different example. If the elders of your synagogue pronounce you a man, you're certainly mature enough to play the ball.
All right, different example. If the elders of your synagogue pronounce you a man, you're certainly mature enough to play the ball.
John, what do you have against 13-year-olds? I was old enough to be tried as an adult at 13, so don't tell me an 18 or a 19-year-old isn't mature enough for the NBA. You were in a prison at 13. No, no, no, John. I was tried at 13. They never found the weapon, man. It's amazing how far a little cash-a-roo will go in the criminal justice system. Corruption. Here's the point, John.
John, what do you have against 13-year-olds? I was old enough to be tried as an adult at 13, so don't tell me an 18 or a 19-year-old isn't mature enough for the NBA. You were in a prison at 13. No, no, no, John. I was tried at 13. They never found the weapon, man. It's amazing how far a little cash-a-roo will go in the criminal justice system. Corruption. Here's the point, John.
We need to get these kids in the NBA, because if they're anything like me at that age, they're going to need a lot of cash. Go Wizards!
We need to get these kids in the NBA, because if they're anything like me at that age, they're going to need a lot of cash. Go Wizards!
Shaquille O'Neal, everybody.
Shaquille O'Neal, everybody.