Superfan Giovanni (Host)

And so there's no jobs at all.

I mean, I was a bike messenger in the winter in Montreal, which is brutal.

So the only jobs around were these fake make work programs for people on welfare.

My buddy goes, hey, they're starting some stupid multicultural paper that's all funded by government grants.

We're going to hijack it.

So why don't you say you're on welfare and get into this program, and then we'll see what happens.

So I crossed my eyes at the welfare center, and I wrote all the applications out with my left hand.

Right.

And boom, I was out of there that afternoon.

See, the worst thing you can do when you're trying to get welfare is say, I'm a hardworking white guy, well-educated.

I'm going.

I'm kind of down on my luck.

You have to come in and go, I'm trying to get it together with so many smart guys.

And then if you write the application such that your name is going down the right-hand margin, and then they're like, dude, here's $100.

This is why I took this job.

They have regular referendums to decide if they should separate.

They had one in, I think it was 1992 or so, which was 54% said stay, and that was all the Anglophones in Montreal.

But they had a terrorist organization called the FLQ who killed a bunch of guys in 1970.

The whole country's in a state of emergency.

Quebec hates Canada.