Tony Robbins

And the more you do things that are incredibly difficult, and especially things that are meaningful, meaning they're not just about yourself,

the higher that esteem would be.

I think the most important thing for self-esteem is to find something you care about more than yourself.

If you find something you care about more than you, you won't be thinking about yourself all the time and all your self-esteem just goes out the window.

The real question is, what do you want?

If you want an extraordinary life, my definition of that is life on your terms.

Some people, it's three beautiful children, a white picket fence.

Some people, it's building a multi-billion dollar business.

Somebody else, it's writing poetry.

Instead of looking for somebody else, it's like, okay, what do you really want from your life?

And aligning yourself with moving forward towards what you really want.

If you can do that in a way that also you feel is serving others simultaneously, there's a sense of meaning in life that can't be replaced by self-esteem or praise or compliments or being nice to yourself.

And I don't think it's bad to be tough on yourself.

I'm pretty tough on myself, I'll be honest with you.

Being overly tough on yourself usually comes by making comparisons that don't make sense.

You compare them to somebody else's life that has a totally different path, a totally different experience.

We all develop in different stages and different things.

We all want different things.

But eventually you wake up and say, it's good to be strong with yourself, but beating yourself up just lowers your energy.

And when your energy gets lower, you produce less.