Wendy K. Laidlaw

It does not bear thinking about, but holding up the mirror to those types of people and procedures is essential for one's health physically and mentally.

That is the key.

You will know if you should be concerned if you are met with annoyance and irritance or impatience from the operating person or medical personnel if you're holding up the mirror and asking appropriate questions.

They only see you as a body on a trolley or on a bed to be tinkered with and notch or tally up their numbers on a board.

This is what one doctor said to me many, many moons ago.

We have competitions about the number of uteruses we take out, Wendy.

He laughed, but I almost threw up in shock.

I joke often with my team and clients that imagine if a man had said that to him about his private parts being gaily removed and added to account.

There would not be money spent on rockets being sent up into space, that's for sure.

So holding the mirror to others and at the same time holding it back to your own inner guidance system is a principle I've become a lot more comfortable with over the past years and it's served me well.

Even recently, I had a disappointing situation where a person forgot that they were to be of service to me and changed from being mildly helpful to being utterly self-absorbed.

I was surprised.

Here was a supposed professional who talked a good game, but when it came down to the actual interaction, delivery and proof, she was totally checked out and totally focused on herself.

Fully focused on herself, despite being paid money to focus on her client, which was me.

So I held up the mirror.

She did not like it.

I held my truth respectfully and held back up the mirror.

I explained, again respectfully, how certain elements of her actions and her promise of services and behaviour had made me fail.

She managed, of course, as these people do, to turn that around into a poor her, rather than acknowledging the reality and inappropriateness of her behaviour that would then cause a distrust and a break of trust between us.

As I've gotten older, I recognise that one has to hold the mirror to oneself first to really get to know, love and understand all of your parts.