Since Adam is on the road today, Harland Williams steps in to host the show. He talks to Newsgirl Shira Lazar about his watching his cat sliding his ass along the floor, and also jokes about autoerotic asphyxiation. Harland also rants about ATM machines, poorly placed tattoos, and The Biggest Loser. Shira then jumps into the news. The top story deals with the WikiLeaks scandal, and the group has an in-depth discussion on whether or not this acts as a contemporary whistleblower, or if it's really illegal activity. They also tease the upcoming NASA announcement, and talk about some unusual reactions to airport security scans. The group then listens to another segment from Adam's audio book. After the break, Harland talks about getting his blood drawn and asks Shira if she would have sex with Forrest Gump. He also gets her to talk about the Lingerie Football League, which the Oklahoma City mayor is trying to shut down. They also play a round of Blah Blah Blog, where they try to match the celebrity to their retarded online rant. After the break, Ralphie May comes in studio. He and Harland reflect on their comedy careers in Hollywood, and the challenges of performing after especially well known comics. Ralphie also tells a story about getting caught with weed at the airport, and he run-ins with the drug-sniffing dogs. In the last part of the show, the guys talk about sexy southern accents, and then things get political during a discussion of Sarah Palin. Ralphie also talks about the 'American Empire', and the problems with dumb people in power. Ralphie contemplates running for president himself one day, and talks about the time he punched a guy in the face. Be sure to listen to The Harland Highway, at HarlandWilliams.com Hear more from today's Newsgirl at ShiraLazar.com And visit our guest's website at RalphieMay.comSee Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

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“What did the council decide on item 42?” — answered with the speaker and the moment.