S1 E42 Why Moving Is So Hard for Women With ADHD: Executive Function, Grief, & Overwhelm
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Why does moving feel like an overwhelming mental apocalypse for women with ADHD?
If I told you that every time I have moved from one home to another, that it has absolutely annihilated not only my daily life, but my nervous system. Would anyone else out there
know what I was talking about? I do. I totally understand. Everyone says moving is stressful. Ugh no, being stuck in traffic is stressful. Moving to
Is crying because you can't find your toothbrush in a room full of boxes marked bathroom. Moving with ADHD is not being able to brush your teeth for two weeks after that because you got so upset about not being able to find the toothbrush in the first place. Yeah.
Well, it's probably too, 'cause you have like too many bathroom boxes. I mean, at least for me. It's when I figure out like, oh wow, I actually do have way too much stuff. And only do I have too much stuff, you find all these duplicates of things. Why do I have like two punch bowls or three croquet sets when I can't even remember the last time, if ever, I've used one? The ADHD tax and we
kind of laugh about buying duplicates, but I'm currently moving. And no chemicals, no liquids can go when you're putting your stuff into storage. And We brought all of those things with us. Eight bottles of Windex. Eight. I don't keep some level of cleanliness that requires eight bottles of Windex. Some people do. I'm not that chick. Eight bottles of Windex is gonna last me five years, and I bet you ten bucks I'm going to buy another two at Costco between now and Halloween. But ADHD moving can feel less like an exciting life event and more like a complete emotional and physical apocalypse. This is angry.
Side.
I'm
Jess. And I'm Janine, we're both certified ADHD coaches, but this podcast isn't coaching.
It's not therapy and it's not medical advice.
It's just real honest conversations about being women with late diagnosed ADHD and everything that goes along with it. Take what resonates and
leave the rest. Today we're talking about moving, but we're also ready to unpack some baggage. Moving isn't just physically hard, it's emotionally and mentally straining.
It's the kind of hard where you're standing in the middle of the room staring at a box and your brain just quits.
Janine and I, both being women with late diagnosed ADHD, have experienced moves that caught us completely off guard and have both physically and
emotionally brought us to our knees. Especially from my last couple of moves. I know moving, it's a lot of work. It's tiring. It always is, but the last couple of times just so much worse. I just wasn't prepared for how emotionally wrecked I was gonna feel.
few have had the same impact on me as well. For a lot of years I tried to approach it logically, but these last few years becoming chronically ill and dealing with so much fatigue all the time. as it is and then trying to push, it's beyond overwhelming. I'd like to think it's just boxes or it's just organizing. But the reality is for me during this move that I'm going through right now, I can remember two months ago having 15 boxes filled and thinking, oh, maybe another 10 boxes and we're done. Not a problem. This is going great. And then I end up with literally 15,000 pounds. of junk and duplicates and crap and clothes and boxes I haven't opened for the last three moves. Um fifteen thousand pounds being put into storage.
You're right about the logic. You're moving from one location to another. Other people seem to do it all the time. Seems like they don't have a problem. They just do it. They've got their checklists, they follow it, and they're done. Meanwhile, I'm sitting here in the middle of my bathroom having existential crisis, surrounded by all those things I've been meaning to deal with.
When you think about moving, it is one of the most executive function intensive things. It requires planning, prioritization, estimating time, making thousands of Tiny decisions all day long, all simultaneously, over an extended period of time, while also hoping if you're moving one from one place to another, whatever the hell's going on, that it all falls into place exactly the way it's supposed to.
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Chapters
5 chapters
1
Why does moving feel like an overwhelming mental apocalypse for women with ADHD?
0:01–4:38
2
How does executive‑function overload make a simple move feel impossible?
4:38–8:50
3
What is the “fantasy” or “Pinterest” phase of moving and why does it fuel ADHD dopamine?
8:50–12:48
4
How does time blindness and unrealistic timelines sabotage moving plans?
12:48–17:00
5
Why can a fresh start still trigger grief and loss of familiar routines?
17:00–19:59
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