Armchair Anonymous: Graduation
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What graduation stories do Dax and Monica share?
Welcome, welcome, welcome to Armchair Anonymous. I'm Dan Rogers and I'm joined by Lily Padman.
Hi.
Today we have crazy graduation stories. It's that time of year.
It is. Happy graduation. Congratulations. Congratulations.
Congratulations, graduates. Yes. Are you starting to see people around town in there? And their hats and gowns. There's fun Saturday lunches because the family's in town.
No.
It's so fun.
It is fun. One of your children is graduating.
Yeah. I mean, they do a graduation now for every single grade.
Well, this is a big one.
Out of elementary into middle school. Yeah, it's a big one. I mean, they didn't do anything for us. Did you have a graduation?
Yeah, we had to sing. We sang.
When the saints come marching in.
I don't know. I believe I can fly.
I believe I can fly. That's right. We sang that.
Do you want to hit me with something? I can believe I can touch the sky.
Think about you every night and day. Yeah, maybe. Think about it.
Every now and then?
I think, if I remember correctly. But I was in fifth grade.
Please enjoy Crazy Graduation Stories.
Hard times come and go.
Hi, can you hear me?
Beautifully. Where are you at?
I'm in D.C.
What line of work are you in?
I work for a nonprofit.
Oh. And how's it going? Are you moving the needle?
Maybe a little bit. I've only been here since October. I was in a lobbying firm, so it was quite the switch.
Wow. Were you going out and whining and dining politicians and urging them to?
Yeah. Wow. Oh, my God. It was a lot of fun, but, you know, it kind of takes a toll. I bet.
What does it take a toll on? Because you're burning the candle at both ends or ethically you feel compromised?
It's a little bit of both. It's a lot of drinking. It's a lot of going out. I'd be great at that.
You would.
Yeah, actually, no.
How did the graduation celebrations change during COVID?
I like to be in bed by seven.
Okay, so you have a crazy graduation story.
Yes. I'll go with the name Patricia. I don't want to get anybody in trouble. It's also my drunk alter ego name, so it felt fitting. Okay. Great.
Where are you from originally?
I'm from Virginia.
Oh, okay, great.
So my girlfriend and I, at the time, we decided to have our graduation party joint together. at a brewery that was about an hour away from our school because her parents happened to know the owners.
Your college graduation?
College graduation, yes. 2021. So we go, we get there. I, for some reason, scheduled a job interview at the same exact time as our party. So I show up, I'm wearing my blazer over my party outfit. I go into the tap room. I take my interview. Everybody else is partying, having a great time. Oh, cause it's on zoom. Yeah. COVID post COVID. So I had applied to so many jobs. So I was like, if I can get an interview, I've got to take it. So I have this interview. I crush it. I'm feeling so good. I'm like going to get a beer. I'm going to go outside, join all my friends. Like it's going to be awesome. So we go out there. We have a great party, gifts, and we do all the stuff. Cornhole. We're drinking. We're having so much fun.
And I look over and I see this gator. And Monica, you might not know what a gator is. Oh, I do. Not an alligator. The driving. Yep.
My friend had one. Like a little six-wheeler.
And so I see it and I'm like, I got to drive this thing.
For sure. A couple beers in. Yeah, yeah.
My girlfriend's parents know the owners. And I'm like, hey, can I please just take this for a spin?
Yeah.
And so I convinced them to let me take it for a spin. I convinced like four or five of my friends to get on it with me.
Did anyone give you a how to on how to operate it?
I don't need a how to.
I've been so sorry.
Yeah. OK, my apologies.
What humorous graduation mishaps occurred during the party?
I'm like, we got to do this. So we get on and we go down this big hill and then there's a river and a lot of land at the bottom. We get down there. I've got like three people on the back. People in the front seat with me, I'm having fun. I'm going to show off a little bit.
Okay, sure, sure.
So I'm going to do some donuts. And so I turn it real hard and I just gun it. And of course, it flips. Of course, of course.
And you got chocked full of passengers.
I jump off. I got my fight or flight...
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Chapters
8 chapters
1
What graduation stories do Dax and Monica share?
0:00–2:04
2
How did the graduation celebrations change during COVID?
2:04–3:45
3
What humorous graduation mishaps occurred during the party?
3:45–12:23
4
What unexpected events happened during the graduation dinner?
12:23–23:07
5
How did the night take a turn for the worse at the party?
23:07–35:33
6
What was the aftermath of Tyler's injury during the graduation party?
35:33–45:09
7
How did the graduation day unfold for the guest?
45:09–54:54
8
What lessons did the guest learn from their graduation experience?
54:54–55:33