# 670 - Meat Prints with Matteo Lane

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What is Bert's new Netflix special about?

Bert Kreischer 0:00
my new special lucky is streaming right now on netflix check it out white women it is enough you're not even married to one no i mean i'm exhausted you have no idea how exhausting they get oh Can I tell you, I just came to the realization, I'm not a fucking journalist. Like, I'm not, I'm like, I'm the worst interviewer in the world because the things I'm interested, like you say, today I sat down in the sauna with my wife and I wrote down all the questions I wanted to ask about, of you. Like, there's certain times where I want to text you, hey, have you heard of this guy or whatever? And, and then my daughter, my daughter, Georgia, I was running through the questions. She goes, hey, daddy's more than a gay man. Oh yeah. So like, don't just sit here and ask him every gay question you have.
Matteo Lane 0:46
I know. Sometimes, well, you know, it's a catch 22, right? Cause it's like, there's, I'm happy to, I'm happy to talk about that. I also talk about that, but then sometimes it's like you do interviews and it's like an hour of it. And like, no, I get it. Like, it's a good, it's a good moment to like, if someone has questions, like I'm happy to answer. Sure. But then also to like, I also write jokes.
Bert Kreischer 1:07
Oh, well, I honestly, after watching this, I hadn't watched a special before I did my pre-interview. And then I watched a special and I was like, oh, he travels a lot.
Matteo Lane 1:16
Yeah.
Bert Kreischer 1:16
And you speak so many different languages, and your accents are so good. Oh, thanks. Well, it depends on who you're talking to.
Matteo Lane 1:22
For real? Spanish people think I sound like Mario and Luigi because my accent's so Italian. The French never respond back to French. And I could speak the best French I possibly could, and they always answer back in English. One time, after my show in Paris, this woman was talking. I thought she was Sicilian, and we were speaking French. And like 15 minutes in the conversation, she's like, Mais vraiment? And I was like, why is she so nice to me? And then I found out she was from Morocco. I was like, well, that's why she's nice. She's not from Paris. And then Germany, forget it. They're just so like, I was like, my friend Francesco Di Carlo always opens for me when we would do, when I do Europe tours.
Bert Kreischer 2:16
15.
Matteo Lane 2:16
Is that from your family? Yeah, we have family and family friends in Sicily. And so I would stay with them. My friend Giovanni and his family were like cousins. And then my family's like in their early hundreds. And they live in like the middle of a town. There's like a donkey house. And so I would just go there every summer and you just come back and then you just speak Italian. Wow. I know. And then you get a knack for it and you learn every other language? Well, the Italian unlocks all romance languages because it's the closest to Latin. So the best language for an Italian to learn next would be Spanish because they're so close. but then also French because Italian and French are actually closer than Italian and Spanish. They're 89% the same. Italian and Spanish are 82% the same.
Matteo Lane 2:56
So like the grammar of Italian and French is more in common. Like they're more difficult, but then phonetically it's closer to Spanish. So like hearing Spanish is easier, but then reading French is easier. So sometimes when I speak whatever version of French I speak, I just speak Italian and put a French accent on it and it works. Wait, they're 82% close?
Bert Kreischer 3:16
Spanish and Italian are, yeah. Shut up. Okay. Say something to me. Let me rephrase that. I don't speak Spanish.
Matteo Lane 3:23
Are you duolingoing it?
Bert Kreischer 3:24
Like in the middle of this conversation, I'll hear like, boodings. No, I did do Duolingo. Or no, it's the one where there's a sponsor. I did our sponsor. I think it was Duolingo. Babbel? Duolingo? I did Babbel. I did Babbel. Do those apps help? Yes, they do. And they're fun to do on a plane. Like when you're... I have flight anxiety. So when I get on a plane, I'll just start doing them. Okay. But the... But you're learning Spanish. No, no, no. No, I... I was under the impression I spoke Spanish. Okay. Until I went to Spain and my daughter speaks Spanish. And my daughter's like, you don't know what you sound like. I would like to hear this. She's like, she's like, dad, when you talk, you go me ice.

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