Loser Line (12/22/25)
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Hi, I'm Dani Shapiro.
We were in the car, like a rolling stone came on, and he said, there's a line in there about your mother.
And I said, what?
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If you haven't heard the loser line before, it works like this. Let's say a guy approaches you while you're out at the club and uses this charming pickup line on you. Hey there, senorita. You must be a straight-A student, because my name's Dean, and you just made my list. Get it? Dean's list. Do they still have those anymore? Does everybody just get a participation ribbon now? Wow, and you got to put him down at the same time. And after he drops that line, whatever you do, don't ask him about what it was like going to college in the 1940s. No, I can spin a yarn. Why don't you have a seat in my lap there? Instead, give him the number of the loser line so hopefully he leaves an awkward voicemail we can play over the air.
Voicemails like this one. Next message. Hey, Ashley, it's Chuck. I met you at the fertility clinic. I actually asked you for your phone number to thank you, but You know, they have the private booth with the magazines and videos to help you get the job done. I had actually gone there a few times and none of that stuff was working for me, but you did the trick. I bet you and you were kind of my inspiration. If you get my drift, I hope that's not weird, but I think you're an inspiring lady. So maybe give me a call. I'll give you a very special thank you.
Next month. Yeah. Oh, my goodness.
I don't think there's a higher compliment a man could pay a woman than saying that.
I think that there isn't a lower compliment. No, it's not a compliment. You wouldn't be flattered if our general manager turned to you and said that?
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