Optimized Out of His Own Identity
episode
Business Growth Architect Show: Founders of the Future
34 min
1 speaker
8 chapters
transcribed 16 days ago
Transcript
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Transcript generated automatically by AI and may contain errors.
What is over‑optimization and why does it trap our culture?
And I realized that I in in gaining success, I lost who I was. I lost myself. And it wasn't until I lost everything that I found myself. My business of 30 years disintegrated around me within about a six-week period of time. And I was taking plastic idols and throwing them into a trash bin. I've spent thirty years of my life performing for others. And what I have to show for it is a trophy. A trophy. A
plastic a plastic trophy.
The question I was left with was, who am I now? Without the clients, without the building, without the awards. Without my position, all of that с власт.
You are in for a treat today. Mike Wiseman with me, and he is the founder of Higher Ground Life Consultancy. And he talks about leadership, but before you roll your eyes and turn off and he's oh my god, I'm not a leadership consultant. Wait, there is more. So, Mike, my opening question to you today is. What is over optimization and what is an over optimization backlash?
Oh. Over optimization, Viette, it's the crisis of our culture right now. We are so geared toward performance. Culture tells us to perform, they tell us what our identity looks like. They try to fill in the blanks. And in the process, they steal away our true identity of who we know we are, or maybe we don't, and we're searching an even more dangerous place for especially young people trying to traverse, you know, you know, their business career. We're so hyped up on performance and success metrics, and we talk about things in inhuman terms. And we suffer as a result of it because if you think about I think about I look, I grew up before there was social media. So now social media Is all comparison. It's all extraction and comparison.
And you're constantly being fed what success is supposed to look like. And you never live up to it. Like none of us can live up to this persona that's been created, this perfectionist view of performance. And by the way, if we don't perform, then we are helpless. We are we feel useless. And what is lost in that equation is kind of the value of of human dignity and the value that you're you that you're born with. To not have to perform, but to simply be present. And I I listen, I learned the hard way. I found that in the performance. In that journey.
So let's talk about that here for a second. So what I'm hearing what I'm hearing you say, Mike, is that We have now gotten Almost machine like. So tell us the story of when you stepped out of this high performance thing because something tells me that the only reason you can talk to us about it because you know better than anybody what it's like to be in it. Tell the story, Mike.
Yeah, it's a painful journey, but I love telling it now because I feel as though I'm I'm living in my true self. And it took me, you know, I love the Mark Twain quotes, one of my favorites. You know, the two most important days in your life are the day that you're born and the day that you discover why. So I was born in nineteen fifty three. I didn't discover why until two thousand nineteen. And there was a big gap in between that and fairly recent, yes. That that gap, Beate, was me chasing the world's view of what success looked like and and and performance. And I realized that I in in gaining success, I lost who I was. I lost myself. And it wasn't until I lost everything that I found myself.
Take me through this because I want to give our audience really the example. So, what did this look like?
Well It was it was quite experiential. There wasn't a formula to it, Vietnam. It was, it was just my my own experience. I I was coming out of a 40-year-plus career in marketing and communications. 30 of those years I own I owned my own company, my own advertising firm. I was on that rat, that mill, that mouse wheel.
How did the collapse of a 30‑year business lead to the question “Who am I now?”
Can't remember what I don't even know what to call it, but I was so caught up in gaining success that I was allowing other people to define me and And I realized now I can only realize now because I had about an 18-month period of complete silence and we can talk about that. I needed to quiet my brain and my heart down and and escape for a while.
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Chapters
8 chapters
1
What is over‑optimization and why does it trap our culture?
0:00–4:38
2
How did the collapse of a 30‑year business lead to the question “Who am I now?”
4:38–9:24
3
What are the five P’s and how did they fuel the shame before finding stillness?
9:24–13:48
4
What is the liminal “void” stage and how does quiet confidence emerge there?
13:48–18:18
5
Why is trust more important than transactions when rebuilding relationships?
18:18–22:56
6
How does the breakdown‑breakthrough‑breakout growth arc transform personal identity?
22:56–27:10
7
What does redefining success beyond money look like for a former ad‑agency owner?
27:10–31:00
8
How can vulnerability and authentic relationships replace the need for a personal brand?
31:00–34:46