Solocast with Debbie on Parenting Differently Wired Kids Through a Pandemic

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What is the purpose of this impromptu solo episode and how does it differ from the regular show?

Debbie Reber 0:01
Hey there, it's Debbie at Parenting. This is another kind of impromptu podcast episode. It's Monday, March 23rd. I'll still be releasing my regular Tuesday episode tomorrow. In fact, I have a fantastic conversation about anxiety and panic disorder with Amanda Stern. So that will be out tomorrow. But I just wanted to share a short podcast that's kind of again outside the norm of my usual format, but in case you're wanting a little more connection I've been offering Facebook lives a couple times a week and I thought I would also just do this extra podcast this week and share some of my thoughts about what's going on in what I'm thinking about here in my home with my family and in relation to our role as parents of differently wired kids in the midst of what is a really unusual time.
Debbie Reber 0:57
One of the things I shared on the Facebook Live I did last week was that I'm noticing a lot of just stress and anxiety among our community in terms of how this transition from school from regular routine is looking at home with our kids. And I just wanted to kind of reiterate and remind you that this is really going to be a messy time. I know that you may be feeling that and experiencing that. But knowing that that is actually exactly what is to be expected now might be helpful. I know that there are a lot of people sharing on social media pictures of their kids happily working away and doing virtual school or that homeschooling is going really well. And I realize that may not be probably isn't the case for many parents in this community.
Debbie Reber 1:51
The reality is that for our kids this transition is going to be harder than it is for neurotypical kids. Our kids tend to be slower to adjust. Transitions can be really disruptive. We may be seeing some ramped up dysregulation right now. We're likely seeing some increased resistance. Many of these kids really struggle with demands being placed on them or just unpredictability. And so the reaction to that is often to just push back. And I know that many of us are experiencing that. We might also be experiencing regressions with our kids because this is such a disruption to to what has been the norm, their status quo, that it is a time that many kids may shut down or may revert back to things that will make them feel safer.
Debbie Reber 2:45
So I just wanted to kind of share that in case it's what you're experiencing. It is normal within the context of who our kids are for them to be experiencing it this way. And the best thing that we can do as their parents right now is to slow everything down. I really encourage you guys to not be overly concerned about grades and homework assignments and falling behind. I know that that feels really important, especially for those

Why are transitions especially stressful for differently‑wired kids during the pandemic?

Debbie Reber 3:18
With kids in middle school and high school and these and what's happening in school feels like it has a really big consequences. But right now we are going through something that our generation has never experienced. There are no rules for what this should look like. And the priority right now has to be Our families emotional, mental and physical well being. That is so much more important than getting homework turned in on time. And because of who these kids are, because of how dysregulated they likely are, because of how intensely they may be experiencing this, just feeling this on a level that they may not be able to even explain or give a voice to in ways other than their behavior. Our primary job has to be to help our kids feel secure and safe and that means dropping demands, lowering expectations, giving lots of love and comfort and room and space for our kids to just be and feel emotionally grounded.
Debbie Reber 4:31
So I just wanted to share that again, I I know that it can be very stressful. Our routines are off too, right? Our work life may be disrupted. I know that many people have lost jobs or have been laid off or temporarily not able to go into the office and for many people that means not getting a paycheck. These are really difficult times. And so focusing on taking care of ourselves as best we can emotionally, mentally and physically.

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