TPP 492: Laura Key on ADHD Aha Moments, Parenting, and Burnout

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What is Laura Key’s background and why is she a trusted voice on ADHD parenting?

Unknown 0:00
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Debbie Reber 0:29
I'm Debbie Reber, and this is Full Tilt Parenting. Today's show is a candid, honest look at what it's really like to parent while navigating ADHD yourself. My guest is Laura Key, the Vice President of Content Strategy at understood.org and the host of the award-winning ADHD AHA podcast. Laura was diagnosed with ADHD at 30, and she brings both professional insight and lived experience to this conversation as A mom raising two neurodivergent kids. So Laura and I are going to talk about the emotional labor that so many mothers carry, the unique challenges parents with ADHD face, and why practicing self-compassion is absolutely essential. We'll dig into shame, burnout, both the quiet everyday kind of burnout, which she calls micro-burnouts, and the big overwhelming kind.
Debbie Reber 1:17
We'll also look at communication. With partners and the pressure that can come with framing ADHD as a quote unquote superpower. So this episode is a real just honest exploration of the joys and the struggles of parenting with ADHD. It's also a great reminder that if you are parenting with ADHD, you are not alone in any of it. So here's my conversation with Laura Key. Hey Laura. Welcome to the podcast.
Laura Key 1:44
Hi, Debbie. Thanks for having me. It's great to see you again.
Debbie Reber 1:47
It's great to see you too. I was on your wonderful show, ADHD Aha, maybe a few weeks ago as we're recording this, and we had such a good conversation. It was very vulnerable on my side. I'm like, oh my gosh, I really, really went there. You are so easy to talk to. And I was like, hmm, I need to have Laura on my show. We're gonna be having a more casual conversation for listeners. This isn't kind of like a here are the five things. That you need to know about X, Y, and Z, but rather just having a really honest conversation talking about lived experience of parenting, momming while ADHDing and all the joy and challenge that comes along with that wild ride. So as a way to kind of set us up, can you give us a little context for who you are in the world and how you're coming to this conversation?
Laura Key 2:34
Yeah. Well, I mean, as you mentioned, I'm a podcast host. I host the ADHD Aha podcast, which is part of understood.org's podcast network. I work at understood.org. So I consider myself to be, you know, I'm a full-time employee, right? So I have a job. I think that's important context, but especially when we're talking about burnout and parenting. I'm a mom of two kids, a seven year old boy and a ten year old girl, who both learn and think differently. I have ADHD myself. I was diagnosed when I was thirty after previously being diagnosed with an anxiety disorder. So the ADHD anxiety combo, which I'm sure you've talked to lots of folks about that. So it's a lot. And as I get older, wiser, we hope. I think it's getting a little bit easier, but who knows?
Laura Key 3:18
We'll see.
Debbie Reber 3:23
Yes. I talk about it as being like the full range of the human experience that we get to have. Yes. Every single day. Which is great and challenging.
Laura Key 3:31
Multiple times a day sometimes. Yeah.
Debbie Reber 3:33
Yeah. For sure. You said you got your identification of ADHD at thirty. Would you just tell us a little bit more about that? 'Cause so many of my listeners are experiencing this, especially because of navigating a process with their child and then kind of realizing, Oh, okay, maybe I need to look in the mirror.
Laura Key 3:55
Right. I get that so many times with my guests as well. They're discovering their ADHD through their child's evaluation or diagnosis. That wasn't the case with me. I didn't have kids at 30. They came shortly after. For me, it was that a year or two prior to my ADHD diagnosis, as I mentioned, I had been diagnosed with anxiety disorder. And once I kind of got that under control, heavy air quotes, right?

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