Chapter 1: What is the significance of the 'Chipping of the Rings' wedding rehearsal?
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Ahoy to my pediculous, humanus, capitus. Oh, you did all three at once. No. That's just one. How dare you reference my humanus. It's actually pronounced huge. No, ahoy to my pediculous, humanus, humanus. That's Jack.
Double humanus. Great.
Yeah. And I am the thyrus pubis. Well, I mean, we're all, I think we're all hanging around the huge anus. Are we in the pelvis? Are you saying we're like tendons or bones or something around the pelvis? No, I would say having, Jack probably hasn't encountered this yet, but you having young kids would have encountered at some point. Oh, vasectomy. No. Where are the tubes? No, no, the kids have it.
The kids have it. The kids have it. Don't give kids vasectomy. Ridiculous human. Unless they've been very naughty. You threaten it, but you never follow through. You never follow through. Pediculous, humanus, capitis. Kids have it. Capitis. Yeah. And you're miming putting a cap on. Yeah. So it's something on your head. Is it the soft? The fontanelle is the soft part of the skull.
Is it something skull-based? It's something that if you find out you've got it in the classroom.
Oh, lice. We're different types of lice, and I bet it's because Liza had head lice herself last week. I'm not meant to declare those.
God damn it. She's borrowing from her real life. It's like Slumdog Millionaire. Yes. Oh, God. Yeah, we've had lice many times. You are capitis being head lice, humanus humanus. That's body lice. Body lice. And I'm thyrus pubis, which are... Pubis lice. The other lice. Up late lice. Yes, adult lice. Pubis lice. Yes, they are the three main types of lice that you can encounter.
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Chapter 2: How does Bec react to the wedding rehearsal and what is her verdict?
So we thought it was best to show her exactly how it would look to get her across the line. Yeah. This is basically like our Olympic host city bid. You didn't want to get back here for the... Asked her, she said no.
So what we're doing is filming this very respectfully and we'll cut it together like a wedding video so we can show her straight after. Her special day. Her special day and we think that'll get across the line.
Like a little bit of a future echo of her special day. Okay. Were you happy to pick it up from this is it? This is the moment. So I'm about to change character now. I'm going to be the celebrant, not Haim. Haim's Harry Styles. Yep. Generous. We now come to the most sacred part of the ceremony, the exchanging of rings.
Rings around as they are a symbol of eternity both into the future and where we've come from. Andy, a large part of your life has been small ball golf. Andy often talks about how much he enjoys the space and quiet of the golf course as the ideal place he can think deeply about his love for Beck. True. That's why he goes out there.
Bec, in your professional life, you are often giving or receiving pitches. Yes. Therefore, groomsman Michael Horgan will now chip the rings to best man Cam using a pitching wedge in a beautiful gesture that combines the two things you love. Lovely. Golf and pitches. Yes. I mean, option.
Yes.
May your love take you to new heights. May it loft you up higher to the angle of 58 degrees, almost the highest loft a golf ball can achieve. Yes. That's the option. I think the pitch is a bit better. We resume. The chipping of the rings ceremony is a very sacred part of any wedding that conducts this ancient ritual.
It beautifully symbolises the chain-like supporting effect that friends play in both Bec and Andy's lives. Whilst Cam will be catching the rings, Hamish and Poppy will assume a backup catching position to further symbolise additional support.
Non-groomsman, but friend, Jack Post will now take his place as medical runner near the altar with a full medical kit ready to discreetly run out and administer very quick and very quiet first aid to any head injuries in the extremely unlikely event of an errant shot.
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Chapter 3: What role does each groomsman play in the chipping ceremony?
When Cameron catches the ball, there will be an impulse to cheer. We will allow a small cheer, but only because it symbolises how excited we are for love, rather than a great chip and catch. Yeah, OK, that's good. Michael, will you please take your place? How many years have you guys been together? Mike, Hogs and I? No, no. You've been together forever. You've met him in great sense. Ah, 12. 12.
Michael, you'll now take 12 large paces from the altar. Very large paces to symbolise how long Andy and Bec's life is. Start from there, though, Hogs. 11, 12. Perfect. Michael has finished pacing. Cameron will now move into the sacred catcher's position.
Perfect. Well, here we are, folks. Michael Horgan with a tough lie on a concrete basketball court. He's a big game player, though. Shouldn't affect him. In front of him, a skinny aisle with ten cardboard cutouts symbolizing Andy and Beck's loved ones. And don't forget cardboard Nick Riewoldt in a wig and veil standing in for Beck. Okay, I think he's ready to chip. Chip when ready.
Let's watch this very beautiful, yet technically and skillfully impressive, expression of Andy and Beck's love. Here he goes.
Oh, no, it's hit Beck in the shin. Oh, gosh, it's bounced under Kev's hand. It's hit Beck in the shin.
Oh, no. Jack, quick. Oh, sorry, that's my job. Do I stretch her off? Jack, it's picked up. There'll be a brief intermission as Beck... Takes a moment to... By rings hitting us in the shin, it symbolises that rings are a... Yep, just roll it. I don't think so. With love comes pain, but we must have both together. They are two sides of the same coin.
Bec has learnt this the hard way, as Michael expertly showed that a marriage can be nothing without the necessary pain that we all must endure. That is the cost of love. Michael will now, for real... Chipped the ring all the way to Cam as Bec has rejoined us and told us she enjoyed the symbolism and would now like to see the real catch. So I just want to quickly pause for a second.
Do you think there's any scenario where Bec gets hit in the shin? Yes. Well, we just saw it.
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Chapter 4: What are the preparations made for the chipping of the rings?
Has medical attention and then is willingly coming back and letting us do this again? What's Bec's dress like? You don't know, do you? No. Full length? Would have to be. Yeah, it's full length. Shin guards. Shin guards. You'd never notice it. Yes, we'll ask him. Hey, if we're going to get this across the line, we need to bury what just happened.
Michael will now, for real, chip the ring to Cameron for the first time.
Michael Horgan with a 12-metre chip for love.
Oh, that's high. Oh, my God. Uh-oh. Who's that?
It's hit Bec's dad in the face off the rebound. Bec's dad has calmed down. Oh, no. Bec's father has always been... Special to her, and in a wonderful show of symbolism, what father amongst us wouldn't also throw themselves in the way of anything that would hurt our child? A beautiful gesture from Bec's father on this special day.
As Andy becomes the main man in her life, he showed us the true pain of fatherhood, of giving away your daughter, but at the same time... This true fighting spirit of the Harding bloodline. He's back and smiling. And now Michael, for real, will chip the ring to Jam.
A sight we've never seen before. A true display of skill. Michael Horgan with a chip for love. Quiet, please. He's ready to go. Oh, beautiful.
Oh, great. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you for your small cheer. Michael, you may now rejoin the wedding party. Medical runner Jack, thank you for your service. Thank you. Well done, Horgan. Depending on the edit, we didn't need you. Cam has opened up the ball and passed me the rings, so I now have them. Andy now has the rings. Bec? Take a moment to wipe your eyes.
Tears of joy, nothing to do with her shins. Tears of joy at the majestic arc of the rings as they landed safely in Cam's hands. As so many of Andy's hopes and dreams have landed in Cam's hands over the years and carefully cradled by his brother to now flawlessly become part of the ceremony.
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Chapter 5: What challenges arise during the chipping rehearsal?
Yeah, I don't think there were no pros.
Okay. Were there no cons? No, there were plenty of cons. No, that's not true. Why? Why?
Why? It's not like, Hogs is not chipping our wedding rings down the aisle.
Do you want me to chip them?
No, no. Okay.
Now I'm confused. How the hell are the rings going to get chipped if Porgs or Hayne doesn't do it? Andy can't chip them. He's got to be up there with you. And I wouldn't trust him. And we don't even know if this celebrant can chip.
It's just not happening. I don't, like, yeah, it's not happening. Also, like, where did you shoot that? You really didn't make a very good case.
You're looking at the wrong stuff. You're looking at Harry Styles and the basketball court. Of course, those things are not going to be there in the day. Bec, I suppose what you're saying, even though this doesn't make a lot of sense to my ears, is are you saying you didn't like the feel of it?
Andy keeps on telling me I need to stop using this word, but hated the feel of it.
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Chapter 6: How does the chipping ceremony symbolize love and support?
Really sucked it in. Pantry. Okay, survey says. Do either of you want to know? That's the item. Do either of you want to have a guess of what they're trying to get rid of?
I mean, tea. It's a bad smell, I reckon. I think it's going to be something smell because leaving the open tea in there would absorb, you know, be an absorb of something. So maybe it's a smelly microwave or a smelly oven. Okay, let's have a listen. I've got two cupboards, Shannon. One is a very old antique cupboard that's very musty.
I'm going to have to give that to Jack.
A pantry is the type of cupboard. But not really. An oven is also a type of cupboard. A hot cupboard.
A very high-tech cupboard.
Jack's is more of a food cupboard.
That goes to Jack. But you guys, close battle today. The tiebreaker is something I heard and I nearly had to pull over because I didn't know that she did this as well. But she does pest control. Okay. But with everyday items in your house. So you guys both have to guess. Guess the pest. What the pest might be. Right. Okay. Jack, you'll be serving. It comes in two parts. Here's the first part.
Oil of clothes doesn't work. You need to use lavender oil. Oh. They're not interchangeable. Oils contain different volatiles. With lavender oil, it acts as a barrier. Spraying it at them doesn't kill them. What it does is stop them crossing it.
That's the first part, guys. My other part that I love is just listening to how much Dennis Walter. He's in deeper than I am.
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Chapter 7: What humorous incidents occur during the rehearsal?
We're going to have them in about 20 different locations through the South Island of New Zealand. And I pledge for one of the hives, we will have the highest altitude hive ever. Well, not many bees will go that high. Yes, I know. And so that will be in experimental hives. Yeah. The honey that comes from that hive will... Which will be none.
By evolutionary science will have to be from the strongest bees only. Yep. And that honey will be the world's strongest honey. The world's strongest bees. LAUGHTER World's strongest bee. See, I am a sucker for that stuff. And you know what? I'm going to put it in. That is going to be an offshoot. We're going to have three main honeys, like different flowers.
Then there'll be a premium Manuka brand. But I'm thinking of doing an offshoot, like an energy honey shot, and it comes from those bees, strong bees. Home's strongest bees.
What do you mean an energy shot? Like a can of bee or red bull?
Well, think about like a little sachet of honey that you have before a workout or a bike ride or something. Are you interested in investing now, Jack? I am interested in investing. Because that strong bee shot will be, that's going to make some waves. The world's highest hive, the world's strongest bees producing the world's most powerful.
Yeah, I like that.
Here's another thing, Jack. I've been actually on the phone a fair bit this week to fashion designers because I'm not going to say what, but we're not the traditional white beekeeping outfit. Ripe for disruption. What, you're going to do a different... You know how SpaceX has way better spacesuits than NASA? All right, you just want a different... But people don't see that part of it.
Like, who cares what you're in, as long as the bees are well-behaved. We'll know.
Actually, it's funny. We don't want well-behaved bees, Anna. We want them to do whatever they want. We want renegade bees, especially these high-altitude ones. You'd prefer them to be making honey for you, though. Well, we want them to come back to the hive, yeah, but I think you've just got to let them do their thing. You can't force your rules on them.
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