Ep 637 - Throat Wrecker (feat. Jeremiah Watkins)

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Matt and Shane's Secret Podcast 1h 8m 6 speakers 8 chapters transcribed 4 hours ago
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What is the opening banter about recording and the comic’s bad‑breath joke?

Unknown 0:00
The Wild Wild West. We're not recording, right? And they said no. And it freaking
Matt Chandler 0:06
went out. And
Unknown 0:06
what'd you say? It was about a comic's bad breath. Nice, we're recording. Who? Who? I can't. I can't start it
Matt Chandler 0:15
up
Unknown 0:15
again.
Matt McCusker 0:16
I already
Unknown 0:16
apologized. to the comic because it went out. It was bad.
Matt McCusker 0:21
Did you confront them for their dastardly kind of sneaky behavior?
Unknown 0:25
No, no. He called me. He goes, I gave the note to the editor. It didn't get implemented. Because we got a group text. The comic group texted me and the other comic. I was like,
Shane Gillis 0:38
Dude. Yeah. So the next time.
Unknown 0:41
Yeah.
Shane Gillis 0:41
Well,
Unknown 0:41
yeah. So
Shane Gillis 0:42
I
Unknown 0:42
call him and I was like, the next time I saw him, I brought him gum and stuff as a joke. There you go. I was like, I got to double down at this point.

How do the hosts explain the causes of halitosis and why it can come from the stomach?

Unknown 0:50
Yeah. Yeah.
Matt McCusker 0:51
And I want someone to tell me if my breath is kicking. Well, that's what he was. I'd like him to tell me, but. Yeah. Privately. It's not broadcast. Yeah. Yeah. Well,
Unknown 0:59
that's why I
Matt McCusker 0:59
said, are we not recording? Yeah. Because it could be a stomach issue too. Right. So. Could be a stomach issue. Could be a stomach issue. I never thought of it like that. Yeah, some bad breath comes from the stomach, believe it or not. I
Shane Gillis 1:12
believe it 100%.
Matt McCusker 1:13
Halitosis. Yep.
Unknown 1:15
Yeah.
Matt McCusker 1:15
But you also scrape your tongue in the morning. That helps apparently as well.
Unknown 1:19
Yeah, I used to hear my dad just
Matt McCusker 1:20
gagging
Unknown 1:21
in the mornings.
Matt McCusker 1:21
You just find all this shit out? Yeah. I'm not a morning brush teeth guy.
Unknown 1:26
What?
Matt McCusker 1:27
Dude, I'm about to eat breakfast. I'm about to eat breakfast. Why would I brush my teeth and then eat breakfast?
Shane Gillis 1:31
Oh, no, I agree with you on that. But then brush your teeth after breakfast.
Matt McCusker 1:34
If I remember.
Shane Gillis 1:35
That's the...
Matt McCusker 1:38
The important thing is to clean them before you go to bed. And in the morning. Yeah, it's twice a day at minimum. Dude, people don't even brush their teeth pretty recently, honestly.
Matt Chandler 1:48
Brushing your teeth is kind of
Matt McCusker 1:49
bullshit. I don't think so. If you look at the... I think people were fine. No, they notably had fake teeth. Really? Fake? George Washington. Oh, he had wooden teeth, yeah. A lot of guys. Oh, he ate sugar. It's his fault. You're right, though, that our diet's gotten more sugary. Yeah, but, you know, those guys got, like, one sweet per year, really. Yeah. So, yeah, maybe I should. I mean, I'm doing all right. I've had one cavity my whole life, I think. I'm not doing it
Shane Gillis 2:14
for hygiene as much as breath.
Matt McCusker 2:17
Gum. That's what I'm saying. Crush the gum. Hit the door. I feel like gum cleans your teeth better than brushing, if I'm being honest. And you get way mintier fresh.
Matt Chandler 2:25
This
Matt McCusker 2:25
is a
Matt Chandler 2:26
hot
Matt McCusker 2:27
Subway take. My wife doesn't like it. She gets on my ass to brush my teeth in the morning. That's good. She'll be like, dude, I just woke up. I just woke up.
Shane Gillis 2:35
We'll say, if I'm out drinking, come home, you go. almost no shadow brush my teeth
Matt McCusker 2:40
yeah i'm fucking
Shane Gillis 2:40
hitting
Matt McCusker 2:40
the sack that's your that's your right
Shane Gillis 2:42
yeah
Matt McCusker 2:43
if you're drinking you don't need it makes
Shane Gillis 2:44
it so much worse when you wake up
Matt McCusker 2:47
yeah
Shane Gillis 2:47
so much worse if you don't brush your teeth and you're hung over oh waking up in the morning like oh
Matt McCusker 2:51
yeah your mouth's all dry
Shane Gillis 2:53
yeah
Matt McCusker 2:54
i don't like how hot i get too when i wake up hung over i wake up with like a mild fever every time like this sucks
Shane Gillis 2:59
yes
Matt McCusker 3:00
i'm not so fucking fun yeah it's fun you get to fight your friends yell at them true true you have to slip the mask you don't do that sober true it would be really weird Be completely sober and be like, I fucking disagree, you dumbass. What's your stance on alcohol and the consumption of it? I'm fine
Unknown 3:25
with people doing it. It's not for you. It's not for me. There's people who drink in my family and stuff that I'm like, all right, I'm good.
Matt McCusker 3:35
What happens? What kind of drunk would you classify yourself as? Have you gotten really drunk before? I haven't, no. Never? No, I haven't. You strike me as you'd be a train wreck if you got hammered. Oh, no. I absolutely
Shane Gillis 3:51
would. There's something behind your eyes. It's something. If you got fucked up. I got some
Unknown 3:57
poison
Shane Gillis 3:57
back there. I've seen you fight, too. You're slapping people. I know. You'd be a real problem. I know.
Matt McCusker 4:02
Well, especially, no, especially if you haven't really, so you've never been like hammered off. No. Never casually. So you've never taken a sip.

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