Chapter 1: What happened during the Christmas and New Year break?
Oh, boys, 2026. G-Lane, how are you, mate?
Oh, good, thanks, Mashi. G'day, Joey. Hey, how was festy season? Did you hit the festivals? Chuck a pinger up your ass?
There were no pingers inserted this summer, nah.
Chapter 2: What was the outcome of the Ashes series and its implications?
I had a fairly relaxed break. What about you? You're notorious for shelving things. I mean, you'll do Panadol if you can.
Yeah, it's my preferred way of taking medication, actually. Just even the old vitamins. I wouldn't advise vitamin C, the fizzy ones. I wouldn't advise that.
Chapter 3: Why are the Black Caps playing an ODI series in India before the T20 World Cup?
That is the definition of fizzing from the bunghole.
Yeah, they're large as well. They are bigger than your average pill.
But you went out of Rhythm and Alps, didn't you, with the kids?
No, I didn't. No, I stayed well away from that. I was in Queenstown, though, for...
for Christmas in the Queenstown area, dipped in, and then did the great southern trek, you know, down the east side of the lake there, and then down through Athol, as we discussed pre-Christmas on the ACC commentary, which I keep getting muddled up, but I think now I'm starting to understand Southland geography a little bit better. But no, I didn't go to one single festival.
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Chapter 4: What are the latest updates on the NFL Playoffs?
Southland, it's the dark age. Central Otago. They're going to start already. They're going to start already. That's Central Otago.
Oh, sorry. I just meant Southern, to be honest. God, we're already getting into the fucking nitty gritty. Are you sure of this? I just meant Southland as in down South.
Chapter 5: What questions did the Agendarati ask this week?
Henry Nipples is scoring runs and Finn's fucking up geography. It's 2022 again. Can we do this year? Can we like, what's the final exam at school for geography? Was it NCEA? Whatever. Can we get you to sit there this year just to see?
Okay, Dipton is a small town located in the southern region of New Zealand. Who are Athol? Oh, no, we're talking about Dipton. I spent Christmas in Southland.
Oh, we're off to a good start.
Oh, what a start. Now I'm actually in a situation where I don't understand what I've got wrong. I actually thought I spent Christmas in Southland.
You did. Yeah, but your road trip down there was... Oh, sorry, fellas.
Right, we're hanging on to every word on the first episode of the year. That's harsh. Should we kick this in the gut? Yeah, shall we wrap this up? This is us for the year. Anyway, what's going on in your world, G-Lane? What's been happening?
I'm over in Japan. I'm over here for the foreseeable, probably to the end of the month, actually. I can't be fucking coming home. Any onsens?
What's going on? I'll be over here. Any onsens?
Any small little downstairs operations? I went to a rugby game, actually. I went to Suntory Sungaliath.
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Chapter 6: How do you engage kids in watching and playing sports?
So, I don't know.
Not many wins for this English side on the field and off the field all series long really was there. That kind of bent clip that came out of him just felt like a metaphor for the whole series. Just a little bit lost, fumbling around, not knowing what way's home. We kind of knew that, didn't we?
We kind of knew that when they were out on their golf tour. I think even the Daily Telegraph wrote a great article and they called it their golfing resort tour of New Zealand, which we all knew it was. Yeah. But I mean, if they'd won, would anyone have cared?
You know what I mean?
Yeah, no, no. That's kind of what I think. That's how Baz rolls. He rolls the same team environment that, you know, that's a great team to be involved in, so you want to be involved in it and you want to play well. But it just didn't come off for them. No, it certainly didn't. I think that, yeah, there was just a couple of crucial, like, sessions, I think, that decided the whole series.
Yeah.
But, fuck, it was compelling watching, though. Shit, it was good.
Yeah, they got pumped, obviously, in those first three. I feel like they could have actually come away with that final test, England, if they really... I mean, maybe that's not a controversial thing to say. I mean, they got absolutely battered into the ground by Travis Head and Stephen Smith in their second innings, but... Travis Head.
What a guy.
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Chapter 7: What are the latest developments in the T20 World Cup preparations?
Drink specials, some like-minded company, and a heck of a lot more. If you're an American sports fan, this one is for you. I don't want to hear these people that are saying, oh, I like to focus on the game. That is what we're going to be doing. We're going to be watching the game, getting amongst it. So come on down to the Tuckapuna Surf Club.
Once again, we'll keep you updated when you can book a table for you and your mates. But get your leave in now for the 9th because that is only a month away. Just a bit of a sweep across the board at the moment.
Can I give a little bit of advice on the Super Bowl Monday?
Yeah, please do.
If you don't want to take leave, client entertainment. Okay, so if you want to entertain clients or a staff do, if you didn't do a Christmas do, it's the perfect way to write off a work expense. So you can book a table of whatever you want, 20, 30 people. I don't really care. I think we can squeeze 300 into Tagapuna Surf Club.
But if you don't want to take leave, just go and say you're entertaining some clients because it's perfect. It's midday till four. Also, it's Waitangi Day, the Friday. So just turn that into a four-day weekend. Hell yeah. Fuck, I forget that.
Yeah, we've got a few public holidays coming up. When's all the anniversary?
That's the ā Monday the 26th, I think.
Oh, you're not that anyone else, I suppose, across the nation. So the Bills won, which Tommy Harps will be stoked about. They got up by three points over the Jags. I think the Broncos already obviously automatically threw along with the Seahawks. The Bears are through after Benny the Packers.
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