Chapter 1: What are the hosts' initial thoughts on TLC's reality shows?
Give me your money for Jesus H. Christ. With just 19 payments of $29.95, you too can secure your place in the front row seat of the afterlife. I had born with an astigmatism, and it had graduated to cataracts. My cousin Jeffrey prayed for me on the phone Tuesday through Wednesday for two weeks, and I had woken up, and I opened my eyes. I never had known that my room had wallpaper.
I'm walking in God's path.
I'm going to make you some bacon, eggs. Yeah, he's on $13 dating apps. Don't mind me. I'll be over here.
Crispy bacon.
Crispy? Or not crispy? What? He just sent someone $3,000 on cash app?
UPS notification. Three diamond rings showed up across South America yesterday. Characters playing defense. Hot defense. Hot defense.
The next episode of The Commercial Break starts now.
Till 30 in the morning! Oh, yeah, cats and kittens, welcome back to The Commercial Break. I'm Brian Green. This is my co-host and best friend, Kristen Joy Hoadley. Best to you, Kristen.
Best to you, Brian.
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Chapter 2: How do conjoined twins navigate their unique relationship?
We had as much fun as it sounded like we had. A lot of times we'll just pretend. But this time we actually had fun. So there you go. A lot of times we're just scared. So we just nervously laugh and ask silly questions. Like, which book do you like? Which book do you like to read on the road? But I will say this. Paul is one of the nice. We're scared. We're just scared.
We're just scared of Paul Scheer.
No, he couldn't have been.
I mean, he was so welcoming and nice. Paul was awesome. As was Neil. Neil was great, too. He was very generous with his time.
I was actually listening. I was laughing because I was listening to Paul's podcast that he does.
How did this get made?
How did this get made? Yes. And they had a guest on that show. And the funny thing is that I never really heard the guest talk. It was mostly still the original people. Yeah, of course. Maybe that's what we should just do.
I think that's what we do do with some of the interviews.
Just leave the guest out. We'll just keep talking.
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Chapter 3: What significant life events have the Hensel twins experienced?
And then maybe I'll put a bumper if it sounds natural, if it sounds unnatural. This is the, you know, the, the minutia of putting together a podcast. Sometimes things go wrong. And here at this studio, often more than not, it's the, that's kind of the batting average. So she says, well, I would, but everyone is talking over each other in the last like 30 seconds of the actual interview.
And I'm like, well, what do you want me to do? I don't know. It's three people in the room. We all got to say our things. Yes. See, that's a problem, too. Not the problem, but the challenge. Actually, I like this. And I think Brad Williams has been like this. Felicia, Joanna Hausman, Heather McMahon. A lot of the guests that we've had on that we've really enjoyed, they are also podcasters.
And so when you put three, yay, four podcasters in a room and expect that any of them are going to shut up, that's just not true. I have been on podcast panels at podcast shows. Where I'm up there with other podcasters and, you know, they give you 30 minutes.
And so I've been on so many of these now that when the person who's doing the actual, you know, the mediator of the conversation with the panelists, they always want to get together beforehand and have some big talk about how it's all going to go down. Right. I'll ask you this and then I'll throw it to him. And then I've just taken a good experience mediator.
Someone who presents knows just go up there, ask one question and the entire 30 minutes is going to be taken by whoever gets that question. And that could be me. And I've been guilty of this in the past. I actually have to like shut myself up and well, I should let somebody else talk because you put podcasters on a stage in front of a microphone and you ask them one question.
That's a 30 minute answer right there. That's what we do. We have learned how to talk into the microphone incessantly.
Yeah.
But it saves my wife from all the conversation at the end of the night, so she can get a good night's sleep. I've already talked it out with you. I'm glad. Anyway, thanks very much for the nice words about Paul. PaulShear.com. Go order his book. Neil Brennan. NeilBrennan.com. Go watch his Netflix special, which is just fantastic. It's hilarious. Yeah, it really is.
It is an hour and five minutes of hilarity. Okay, now let's get to the important stuff. All right, the meat. I think maybe this was episode number 12 or 13. When I talked to you about a TLC show, of course a TLC show. A galaxy far, far, far away.
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Chapter 4: How does Garrick's pursuit of multiple relationships unfold?
I can't believe it. I can't believe how much talking I've done on this show. 712 hours of Brian talking ago. We talked about a TLC show that was following around. This is an old dark show. It was like back in 2000, you know, the aughts, the mid aughts. We talked about a TLC show where they had profiled conjoined twins. Now, the conjoined twins are female. They're two female conjoined twins.
They are conjoined at the hip. So now I want you to imagine this. Two heads. There's two arms. and then two heads, and then they come together in the abdomen, right? So anything below the waist is shared. Anything above the waist is independent. So the one on the left controls the left arm, and I guess the left eye, I'm not even really sure how that works.
And then the one on the right, I mean, they both have two heads. Brian, you're an asshole. And then the one on the right controls the right arm, so on and so forth.
update years ago a couple of years ago and now we're all just finding out about this now and since you're hearing it here last we actually found out about it two weeks ago uh but the conjoined twins one of them has gotten married oh one of them has gotten just married just one you want to read the byline Sure. Okay, just waiting for you to answer.
Well, I was picturing it in my head. Here, I'll show you a picture. Also, they are one. They're only one person from the torso down.
So figure that one out. I mean, do you only get a hand shandy from the left hand? I'm not really sure. I mean, I don't want to be glib about it. No. Because I think it's beautiful and wonderful that someone is finding love. Yes. Find your love. Everybody deserves love. But is it just one of you that's really falling in love with this guy? You can't go on dates. How do you have any privacy?
I don't know.
What happens during lovemaking? My mind is smoking.
I know. I'll try to figure it out. I can see it. I can actually see smoke coming out of your ears. This is a very interesting question. And again, I don't want to be glib about it. And I remember this about the story. When they were born, the doctors said, we can do an operation, but it is highly likely we lose one of them.
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Chapter 5: What challenges do Garrick and his wife face in their relationship?
if not both of them. We lose one of them, if not both of them, but we're willing to take the chance so that at least, the doctors were saying, we're willing to take the chance so at least one of them can live some kind of semi-normal life. And the parents, you cannot split the baby. I know that's in the Bible somewhere, but you cannot split the baby. That's just impossible.
I wouldn't make that choice either. I'd be like, fuck no. These are my children. Let them live as long as they're going to live and let me have my time with them. I don't want to take the chance that I'm going to lose one or both of them. So this is like a super incredible story of perseverance and what a life you must have lived. Wow. They're also teachers, so they teach together in a classroom.
Oh. So here, let me read the story to you. Ready? Whether you're ready or not, here it comes. Yes, I'm ready. Abby and Brittany Hensel, who documented their lives in a TLC reality series, have transitioned from a duo into a trio. Abby, the left conjoined twin, married Josh Bowling, a nurse in the United States and a United States Army veteran.
They live in Minnesota where the Hensel twins were born and raised. Abby and Brittany, 34 years old, have been living private life since their eight-episode show, Abby and Brittany, aired in 2012. But it's been a happy life for them in Minnesota, where they were born and raised.
According to the Today Show, which obtained marriage records for the spouses, the sisters are both fifth grade teachers in their home state. Abby and Josh kept their marriage under wraps from the public eye until 2023 when they shared photos of the wedding ceremony on their TikTok. A wedding guest's resurfaced clip revealed an intimate moment from the lovebird's wedding on Facebook.
A 20-second clip posted on Heidi Bolling's Facebook captures the couple dancing and kissing at the wedding reception. Abby and her sister wore all-white sleeveless bridal gown and a lace... While Bowling wore a gray suit. Congratulations, Bowling. Bowling is seen staring into his blushing bride's eyes while Britney supports her sister.
The duo originally appeared on the Oprah Winfrey show in 1996, explaining their lives as conjoined twins. They were born as twins. Dice fossilists can join twins, a rare condition when two heads are on a single body with one genital system. Two, three, or four arms, two hearts, and two legs. The Hensel twins share a bloodstream and all organs below the waist. That's amazing.
Abby controls the right arm. And leg, and Brittany controls the left side. Unbelievable. Unbelievable.
It's really unbelievable. And who got married?
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Chapter 6: How do the hosts react to Garrick's actions and decisions?
I'm thinking of all kinds of questions.
It's Abby. Abby's the one who got married. And Abby controls the... I think it was right. Yeah, I think you're right. Abby controls the right arm and the right leg. So, you're getting right-hand shanties. How do you make love? Do you need permission?
There's some questions I legitimately have.
Yeah, but let's get my head out of the dirt right now and let's pick it up just a little bit and wonder, how do you on a date? How do you have intimate moments?
Well, they're not private. And maybe just growing up that way from the get-go, you never know anything different. And that's just another part of you, I guess, kind of like a...
arm or a hand i don't know i mean maybe you learn to tune it out yeah maybe you learn to tune it out goddamn fuck that's like that would be a good skill to know wouldn't it between you and kevin yeah kevin and i can join if kevin and i were conjoined i would ask for the surgery i'd be like i don't care what my chances are of living separate me from this guy he's driving me crazy
Well, that is true. I mean, think about if you get mad at the other person, you can't.
No, you can't. There's nowhere to run. Yeah, you go over there in the corner. Well, you got to come with me. I don't want to be around you right now. I mean, imagine all the drama. But now I have to say that, you know, as a twin, which is a definite, it's not. I guess what am I trying to say is that I don't know anything different than being a twin.
Mm hmm.
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Chapter 7: What insights do the hosts share about love and relationships?
Yeah. A maze balls. It really is. And I want to know about all of it. I wish I knew about all of it. I wish they would come on and I could talk to them about this because I want to know about everything. How did you meet? What was the first date like?
Yeah. And I guess like even in other aspects of their lives, I guess you really, I mean, you have to decide together that you are going to do this one job.
Yeah.
You have to agree. Hand job?
No.
No, you do. Teacher. You're right. You have to agree on everything. You have to agree on what you're having for fucking breakfast.
Well, you could have a different breakfast.
True, but I mean, don't you, like, what if, okay, maybe not breakfast, two different bowls of cereal.
Because they have two mouths.
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Chapter 8: What advice do the hosts give regarding dating app conversations?
There's a little video of them dancing together. This is them when they were kids. So look at that one picture when they were kids and they're learning how to ride a bike. They have to coordinate the left and the right leg because they each independently operate one of those. Yeah. Yeah, then you can scroll up and then there's like pictures of the wedding. That's insane, isn't it?
It really is.
life takes on so many beautiful and weird forms yeah it's and they're thriving they're they're thriving one of them's married okay now here's here's where i think it could really get tricky what if brit brit falls in love then what do they do right josh is gonna have to fall in love with him too because i'm telling you what You're going to be sharing the package.
You are sharing, for sure.
That's it. But they are... If you watch them on television, if you go back and you can find that 2012 documentary series that TLC did, if you watch them on television, they are two independent people. Now, they do finish each other's sentences and stuff like that. Of course they do. But they are two independent people with different likes and dislikes and all this other stuff.
It's just like... And from the guy's perspective, too. I mean, you have to really like both of them.
Well... I'm sure Josh is a perfectly lovely person, and he has seen past so much to fall in love with one woman. So I really want to pat the guy on the back and say cheers. But I just wonder a little bit. I just wonder a little bit about the motivations. I don't mean to be kind of dour about it, but it's like that the girl that we were watching, you know, that never aged. Remember her?
Remember that girl? TLC series that never came back. I don't know what happened to her.
Yeah, she was like 12 or something.
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