Now I'm a Belieber! (The Return Of Carl Lentz)
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Who is Jim Touchdown Jeffries and what is his role in the podcast?
This is WSHIT's head sports reporter, Jim Touchdown Jeffries. Welcome to the Game of the Week. That's right, I'm the same Touchdown Jim that scored the final six points in the State Class D Championship game back in 1976. You may remember the game as fondly as I do. Touchdown, Jim, that's me, ran 72 yards in the wrong direction, confused by the bright lights, only to be carried back by my quarterback to the opposing end zone where the final touchdown was scored. And while I had not even made the team that year, we were six players short that day because the opposing team failed to show up and the coach made the call. And that, my good friends, is how history is made. That's how history is made. We have a hell of a game for you tonight. The Crabapple Nutbags, our boys, are facing their toughest competitors in the Sheboygan Sheep Wranglers. This, my friends, is as exciting as a 6-7 year old t-ball match is ever going to get.
So let's go down to the field where Coach Derek Ponderosa is fresh off probation and ready to give his pre-game talk.
Our goals are, listen, listen. Our goals are to hit dingers. Everybody better have their eyes on me. Eyes on me, Rylan. Hit dingers. Disgrace the pitcher's family. Make the other players cry and stomp their butts into the ground. Does everyone understand that? Does everybody understand that? Look, fellas, look, look, look. There are two types of people in this world. There's two types of people in this world. There's winners. And there's losers. And just so that we're clear, every time we step on this field, our goal is to be a winner. And if your dad has said, oh, it doesn't matter whether you win or lose, just as long as you have fun, well, I hate to say it, your dad's a loser. Okay? So let's get our hands in. That team's pretty good. But we are gooder.
So let's go gooder on three. Let's go gooder on three.
I could not have said it better myself, coach. Your dad is a loser indeed. Let's take a quick commercial break and we'll be back with the game.
On this episode of the commercial break.
We're still in touch, me and Biebs. I say, hey, Biebs, come on over. We'll smoke a blunt. We'll get on Pornhub.
A little b-ball.
We'll play a little basketball, a little b-ball. I'm in my time out period, but trust me, when I come back, you're going to love it. We'll be back together before too long. Paparazzi just waiting outside for us. All right, I got to go.
Hope with this whole thing is that you can look at what's happened in our life and maybe you can recognize a little bit of your story in ours and together we can all grow. So the future of the podcast is going to be me bringing on people that I love, that have changed my life, that have helped me heal, that are helping me heal. And that's the future. But the right, including four-time ABN winner
Fair Abraham. Fair Abraham is my first kid.
The next episode of The Commercial Break starts now.
Oh, yeah, cats and kittens. Welcome back to The Commercial Break. I'm Brian Green. This is my dear friend and the co-host of this show, Kristen Joy Hoadley. Best to you, Kristen.
Best to you, Brian.
And best to you out there in the podcast universe. How the hell are you? Thanks for joining us. Were you a Girl Scout? I was.
You were? Well, I was a brownie, which is the one right before Girl Scouts. And then I think I did Girl Scouts for one year. So I just did like brownie one year and Girl Scout one year.
Did the brownies sell the cookies?
I can't remember. I was so young.
Man, I'll tell you what, it's Girl Scout cookie time, and that is a dangerous time for all of our waistlines around here because they are so good. The tagalongs or whatever you call them, now they have the toffee something or other.
Those toffee ones are good.
Oh, my God. Absolutely addictive. A regular old shortbread cookie with toffee pieces in it. It is crack. That's what it is. It's crack. Now that I don't smoke crack anymore, that's my crack. It's crack. There's no doubt. And my kids love them, and everybody loves them. We spend about $110 on cookies every year, and they're gone within the week.
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