Chapter 1: What were the highlights of the Super Bowl discussed?
Here we go. You want me to start at the feet or you want me to start at the head? Because I'm really wanting to blister some of y'all's haircuts. Amen? That's right. I mean, you're in an independent Baptist church and you've got a King James Bible in your hand and you've got a contemporary liberal hairdo. What in the world is wrong with you? Would you boys quit trying to look like the world?
You ain't as cool as you think you are. You ain't as tough as you think you are.
I'm going to get you a haircut that's high and tight over your ears and off your collar line. And look like somebody that's been to the barbershop instead of the beauty salon.
Amen.
On this episode of the Commercial Break.
I learned the words to like beef. And then I'm like, what beef? And then they point to a giant sign of like 30 different beef dishes. All right. Just guess. Not the dog. Not the dog. Please. Yeah, I had dog once. I didn't have it, but I saw it on the menu once. Did you really? Yeah, like, what is that? They told me. I was like, what's that word? And they were like. And I was like, chicken?
And they're like, no, no. Bark, bark, bark. Bark. And I'm like, oh, that's all right. That's all right.
I'll pass on the bark. Yeah. The next episode of The Commercial Break starts now. Oh, yeah, cats and kittens, welcome back to the commercial break. I'm Brian Green. This is my dear friend and the co-host of this show, Kristen Joy Hoadley. Best to you, Kristen.
Best to you, Brian.
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Chapter 2: Who is Ari Shaffir and what are his latest projects?
Thanks for joining us on a Tuesday after the Super Bowl. One of the most uneventful Super Bowls in history. I mean, eventful in the sense that it happened and there were commercials. It was weird. And Kendrick Lamar was there. And so was Donald Trump and Taylor Swift. We'll get into all of that tomorrow in detail. But wow, what a blowout.
I mean, it was zero.
The Philadelphia Eagles. Manhandled Patrick Mahomes. They did. Manhandled Mahomes. Probably the best quarterback certainly of our, you know, in this time period. Shocking. It really was. I don't know the first fucking thing about football and I was shocked. Totally shocked. During the second quarter, I was like, well, this is over, I guess.
I guess we're just going to all sit here and watch the Eagles. It honestly looked like a high school team playing a flag football team. It was unbelievable how the Eagles tore them apart in every aspect of the game. What do they have, like 100 yards of total offense or something like that? And I don't even know what that means, Chrissy. I don't even know what that means.
Yeah, going into halftime, it was like 23.
Yeah, it was 23 to nothing and 30 to nothing within the third. Anyway, TCB Infomercial Tuesday. You're not here to listen to football and listen about football. I know that if you're here to hear Brian talk about football, change the channel. Not going to do it.
uh tcb infomercial tuesday with ari shafir he is here with us i'm so excited to talk to ari ari is a noted comic who has many specials out there he's been doing this for a very long time a podcaster longer than i guarantee you and i have even known what i've known about podcasts for a long time i guarantee he was doing it long before we even heard the word on the bandwagon yes
He had 2015, I think, is when he started his first podcast. He's made many appearances on many different podcasts, including The Rogan Show, Tom Segura's podcast. And then he's got his own podcast called You Be Trippin', which is very good.
I listened to it.
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Chapter 3: What challenges does Ari face while traveling for comedy?
He doesn't have a cell phone. He doesn't have an agent. He only has a home phone that he never answers. Apparently in Charleston that Chrissy and I have tried to dial a number of times. We did. And an email address is like one of the only ways that you can get a script over to Bill.
It's like there's story after story after story about how hard it is to try and get Bill Murray to be involved in anything. So I thought, who the fuck still has a Yahoo address? I know. Who? No one. So clearly this is his real email address because this is the way Bill Murray would have done it. Fax machine and Yahoo email address. That's clearly what's got to be going on here. Yeah.
So I emailed that fucking email address, and what comes back is the strangest fucking story about him seeing a dog in the mirror, and then he had to go to the vet to get checked out. It's like a really weird, convoluted, complicated marketing scheme, I guess is the best way to put it, for Yahoo Mail. An effort to bring back Yahoo. It's not going to happen.
We all have bad memories of our Yahoo accounts. We're not going back there. We all have bad memories of not being able to email, not understanding what email is, and Nigerian email scammers. We all have a bad memory about trying to get $14 million out of South Africa. Okay? We all have it. Everyone's got that story because Yahoo put us in that position. And I'm sorry, Yahoo. I'm not going back.
If I show up to a meeting, any meeting, even though I'm a dumb, mediocre comedy podcaster, if I was to show up to a meeting and say, yeah, my email address is brianpodcast at yahoo.com, people would laugh me out of the room. There's no serious person in the world that still has a Yahoo email address. Is there?
I don't think so.
No. Chrissy said no.
Even further back as AOL.
Oh, don't even get me started on AOL. I actually just emailed with a guy who had an AOL email address.
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Chapter 4: How does Ari Shaffir view the evolution of the podcast industry?
I was a Bud Light guy. When I walked in and I saw that blue box, I knew that was mine. And I she knew I was hers and I knew she was mine. You know, that kind of thing. Yahoo. I had that same sentiment with for a while because, you know, Jam Land Productions at Yahoo dot com. by the way into um was it music live music production yes we would put on festivals and live edm concerts at clubs
Fashion shows slash Grateful Dead shows slash EDM concert. We're a little bit ahead of our time with that one. But jamlandproductions at yahoo.com, probably still out there somewhere, I would imagine. But I felt like some kinship with Yahoo because they were my email service provider. Sure. But I think once I got a Blackberry, it just all turned to shit.
I thought, I don't need that Yahoo anymore. But, you know, strange thing about Jam Land Productions.
Chapter 5: What does Ari think about controversial podcast guests?
That name is actually still alive and kicking with Pete. Oh, right.
With your guy. The DJ.
Yes, with the DJ. He's still putting on shows under the name Jam Land Productions. There you go.
We must go check one out.
We must. You know who else is putting on shows? Who's that? Ari Shaffir is putting on shows. He's on tour. He's on his farewell tour. He's hitting a bunch of different cities, including Atlanta. So we'll have to have a conversation with him about that. We'll angle for free tickets. We'll see what happens. Yeah. Ari is very popular. He's got many specials out there on YouTube.
You can go to arishafir.com for all of the information. I will put links in the show notes. You can also check out his new special, America's Sweetheart, which is doing apparently well on Netflix. It pops up. I don't know if Netflix just, like, throws those things in front of me. It's probably an algorithm, right? Yeah, it is. You like this, so you'll like that.
I've read about it a lot back, yeah. All right. They're fucking with me like the rest of the Internet is?
It's all an algorithm.
Well, anyway, you might have to go searching for it, but Ari Shaffir has a new special called America's Sweetheart, and it is very good. You should go watch it. We're going to talk to Ari about all of his comings and goings and maybe ask him about a few pop culture things and see what – get his temperature. Let's do it.
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Chapter 6: What was the significance of Bill Murray's concert experience?
While Brian takes his old man bladder to the little boy's room, let's talk turkey. TCB needs your help. If you love the show, do us all a favor and share. Sharing is caring. And we know you care. Don't you? Well, don't you? Ooh, that was some childhood trauma. Rearing its ugly head. Do you want to be on the show? Leave us a voicemail at 212-433-3822.
Chapter 7: How does Ari's comedy relate to his personal experiences?
And you could be the next TCB Disembodied Voice. I'll take a raise now. Bitches. Bye.
Ari, thanks so much for joining us today. We really appreciate it.
Welcome.
Thanks, guys. Thank you very much. You're in the beautiful city of Nash Vegas right now?
Yeah, it's pretty red. I got drunk yesterday. You got what? I got drunk the night before. Drunk yesterday.
I lived there for five years. It's a fun city.
Yeah. Yeah, it is. It's a nice, red town. Where do you go when you're in Nashville?
What's your favorite honky tonk to head out to? I don't know. I've avoided Broadway this time. I'm in East Nashville for the first time, which is kind of cool there.
uh still some crime still some some hipsters that's where the new gays are coming to try to take it back yeah it's got a little grit to it yeah you're doing it you're doing a number of shows in vegas huh i mean in uh nashville huh yeah i got five they're all great club rules it's a really cool place yeah i got to hang out with nate yesterday and his wife were you but you weren't doing a show with nate were you
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Chapter 8: What insights does Ari share about the impact of travel on creativity?
She was like, did you see this? And I see it. I'm zooming in.
Quadrant 6G.
Zoom.
Enhanced.
For like 15 minutes, Rolling Stone had the unedited photograph on their Instagram. And I'm sure everybody took a screenshot like I did. But now when Astrid looks at my phone and she sees a nude woman, I'll be like, you sent it to me.
So I don't want anyone complaining. I didn't even know there were nude women until you sent me that one. Now it's all I can think about. But yes, Kanye's music rules. That's what we should focus on.
Not him standing there like a loony. That is the point that you made that I thought was pretty prescient. And we had this conversation in the studio a couple of weeks ago. We were kind of talking about how some of my children are now listening to Michael Jackson because Michael Jackson is in some of these cartoon movies that he's got, like he's got, you know, the bad thriller and stuff like that.
And I was like, I wonder if that's, you know, I wonder if I should have any feelings about that. But I really don't because sometimes it's important to separate the art from the artist. And you said something interesting. I'm not going to butcher your joke, but you said something interesting. I don't follow Kanye on Twitter. I follow him on Spotify. And I think that was a really well done joke.
That is a prescient point. Like all artists are fucking Looney Tunes. Looney. Looney Tunes. All of them. Went last night and saw Bill Murray and his blood brothers, the band. So Bill Murray singing, playing drums and tambourine very poorly. I'm a cowbell. Yeah. Bill Murray, the comedian, comic actor? Yeah, the comic actor. It was crazy.
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