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Chapter 1: What vacation stories do Bryan and Krissy share?
On this episode of The Commercial Break.
I had a massage with her one time. And we did like a three and a half hour massage.
Yeah, Jeff got that before too.
Yeah, I went on forever. She just kept saying, okay, you know, we're approaching the hour. Do you want to do another 30 minutes? And I kept saying yes until we were three and a half hours into it. $700 into it.
Astrid was like what the fuck Astrid went to somewhere she like went out with a friend or something and she came back and I'm half naked in my child's room with this lady still there three and a half hours later she's like what is going on I go don't worry not sex would have been done a long time ago had it been that that would have been a five minute massage the next episode of the commercial break starts now
Oh, yeah, cats and kittens, welcome back to the commercial break. I'm Brian Greene. This is my dear friend and the co-host of this show, Kristen Joy Hoadley. Best to you, Kristen. Best to you, Brian.
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Chapter 2: How did Bryan's back pain lead him to UP Massage?
Best to you out there in the podcast universe. Every time we come back to the studio after a long break, I always feel like something's amiss with my headset. But it's not. It's just me getting used to the sound of my own voice again. That's right.
Yes. We've been away for a while.
We have been away for a while. Look at us taking a vacation every five days.
I know.
We're here for a day. We take off for three weeks. We come back for a day. We're off for four weeks.
Yes.
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Chapter 3: What was Bryan's experience booking a massage appointment?
Not that we're trying. Nothing's wrong with the commercial break. We just have a little bit of a different schedule this year. And that's the way it is. So deal with it. There you go. But if you're catching us, you can catch us live on YouTube.com backslash the commercial break. Usually when we're here. Yeah. When we're here. If you can figure that out.
Which we will be this week and next week.
Yeah. See if you can find patterns. See if you can find patterns in our patterns.
Yeah. Yeah, I don't think AI could even find our patterns.
AI has given up on me. I had a whole thing going on with ChatGPT about the commercial break, and even it imploded. It decided it didn't like me anymore. The other day, I was like, I go, hey, chat, and I was talking to it about a content idea that I had. And it goes, it's been a long time since you've given me new episodes of the commercial break. Everything okay?
Yeah.
Welcome back, Brian.
Welcome back, Brian. Welcome back, Katia. So we've been out of town for a couple of weeks. I went to Spain. Gustavo.
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Chapter 4: What unusual events occurred during Bryan's massage?
I went to London. I went to Spain. I was in New York. Gustavo. Oh, yes. So congratulations to Gustavo and Allie. And if you're saying this story sounds familiar, it's because they did have two weddings and I went to both of them. So we'll get into all of it. I'm very excited to share all the shenanigans that went on with three children gallivanting around Europe.
I think they did pretty good, actually. I'm giving my kids a little little credit, even though they're shitheads on most days. And you can't take the, you know, you can take the shithead out of America, but you can't take the, you can take the America out of the shithead, but you can't take the shithead off. Whatever the saying is. I don't even know what I'm trying to say.
Jet lag is still fucking with me a little bit.
I was going to say, do you know what time zone you're in?
I have no fucking clue, actually. Because as soon as I got off a plane from Europe, I got back on a plane to New York. And then had to adhere to some kind of schedule for two days, including being in town when the Knicks and Donald Trump and that whole thing. I will say this. We, you and I, were here when the worst to first Braves madness happened. That's right.
And then subsequently, year after year after year, as the Braves went on an epic playoff run, you know, year after year after year, we got spoiled. We were just used to them being in the MLB playoffs. And then it didn't happen for a couple of years. A couple of years, the teams, you know, they danced with the playoffs. So they got into the regionals, but they would kind of fall apart after that.
And then like four years ago, five years ago, the Braves won the World Series.
So exciting.
And the town was insane.
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Chapter 5: How did the massage therapy differ from Bryan's expectations?
Like everybody was all about the Braves. It felt good. The town came together. The team was doing well. I went to a couple of the games. It was just like I've never heard something so loud in my life. Everybody in Atlanta. Feeling good, having pride.
Praise mania.
Praise mania in this town. Now, New York and Atlanta are two totally different towns, for sure. There's Southern charm down here. You have a different attitude, a different mood. It's a different city. It just is. New York is the city. There's no city like it in the world. Nowhere in the world is like New York.
That's right.
But when I even was getting on the plane, people around me on the gangway while we were waiting to get on the plane, everybody around me talking about the Knicks. They didn't know each other. They were people wearing Knicks jerseys, Knicks hats. They were talking about, you know, could they go to the game? They wish they could go to the game.
One guy that was behind me, a couple of people behind me talking to the lady worked at Madison Square Garden. He was the tech guy that made the stuff that goes on the big board, on the screen. That's what he did. And he would make those templates and those designs and he would work with the team that would then put them up through the game.
So I was listening to him talk to this lady and he lived in like Evanston, Indiana or something like that. But he would fly into New York for three or four days a week.
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Chapter 6: What humorous moments did Bryan encounter during the massage?
Sounded familiar to me. And he was even saying like, you know, he's been working for MSG for 15 years and this is like nothing like it. The town was insane.
Yeah, I saw there were watch parties all over the city.
Every park had a watch party. When I got back from dinner at about 9.15, I got into my hotel room. I'm around a bunch of big buildings. I had a balcony in my room. You could just go on the balcony. You could see in the city all the people that are watching their televisions, watching the Knicks. So exciting. It was very exciting.
On the town like where I was in Soho, people had written things on the sidewalk like about the Knicks, like, you know, facts about the Knicks, statistics, you know, cheering on the Knicks. And people were just stopping and reading it, taking pictures. It was a very it was like a very festive mood. Until it wasn't a festive mood.
Until people had to wait four and a half fucking hours after paying $48,000 for a ticket to get into the five block radius that was shut down. Like it was something out of a, I don't know, like a doomsday game that you would play on your PS3. They had like 10 foot fences around a five block area. That's insane. That's insane. Why? Why? Why did Donald Trump have to be there?
I don't know. I was and then I was reading something in one of my news clips. They were like, yeah, he couldn't make his son's wedding because he was too busy. But he golfed during his son.
But he ground New York to a halt.
for 10 fucking hours so that he could go sleep at the next game sleep at the next game that's what he did he fell asleep i i don't i don't fault the guy for wanting to be there he's the president united states that is one of the perks of being the president of the states the super bowl has a well-worn path to this they've done that like presidents have gone to the super bowl their presidents go to sports things they do that you know i understand that that's what you want to do
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Chapter 7: What lessons did Bryan learn from his massage experience?
But you know, like everybody else fucking knows, that New York is not the place you shut down five blocks worth of traffic for 10 hours. You just don't do that. He could have watched from anywhere else in the world, and he went there. Now, some people are saying that Donald Trump is the reason why the Knicks lost. Donald Trump isn't the reason why the Knicks lost.
The Knicks lost because they took 72 three-point shots and hit one of them. The Knicks lost because they didn't play as well as the Spurs did.
But we should blame him anyway.
But we should blame him anyways. Yes. But when the game was over, the craziness just ran off into the streets. I could hear it outside of my room. I had my door a little bit. People screaming and yelling. The honking was insane. You know, sometimes I'm walking down the street in New York. People honk. Oh, tons. It's just a way of life there, right? You honk your horn.
But you can tell that like native New Yorkers really are sick of this shit, sick of the honking. And I can understand why. It's hard to sleep when everybody is honking their fucking horn. Sometimes, and it's happened more than once, I'd say four times that I've been in New York for the last couple of months, you know, a couple days a week. I'm walking down the street.
Someone honks their horn close. And someone that's walking around me or close to me goes, shut the fuck up. One guy goes, was that really fucking necessary? I was like, I feel you, brother.
Yeah, sometimes a honk is not warranted.
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Chapter 8: What future travel plans do Bryan and Krissy discuss?
No, it's not. No, it's not. But, you know, hey, listen. Okay, so Knicks mania. It was very exciting to be in New York during that time. But to be honest with you, tonight's another game, and I'm glad I'm out of the city for it. Soho is just like, it's a very crowded place already. And I get the sense that the summertime is going to be double as crowded as
was when it was spring or winter time because the streets are just, they're madness. And that's Stussy. That fucking Stussy.
I was listening to something the other day and they were talking about Stussy, Stussy.
Stussy, Stussy, Stussy, however you say it.
Oh, that brand's back in fashion? And I guess so.
That brand is very much back in fashion because people are waiting hours, days to get into that Stussy fucking studio in New York City. And I don't, I've taken a peek in there when they're, you know, the windows like at night when everything's closed.
Yeah.
Why are we waiting that long? It's cool. It's street wear.
Cool, man. Everybody likes a good pair of street wear. But I mean, there's like grandmas waiting in line for our... There's a mix of human beings that are waiting for that Stussy. And I feel like this is another... We have another... La Boo Boo on our hands. Do you know what I'm saying? I was going to say Beanie Baby, La Boo Boo. That's right. I get it. Streetwear is cool.
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