Chapter 1: What is a dussy and why is it significant?
see to y'all i only appear to be riding a bicycle but to me i'm putting miles between me and a dirty bitch on this episode of the commercial break
Yeah, I'm so glad we get to do all of our masturbating at home now. Yeah, it's been private. The internet has brought us privacy. I can do it wherever I want, whenever I want. I mean, well, not here, but, you know, not in this household. But there is six to seven seconds a day when you get privacy. So if you're quick about it, you can figure it out.
I'm just going to be like, hey, hon, I'm going to go fill up my dune popcorn bucket. I'll be right back.
Me and Deucey are going to go in the bathroom for a few minutes. Leave me alone. I just want to be with my dune toy.
The next episode of The Commercial Break starts now.
cats and kittens welcome back to the commercial break i'm brian green this is the beautiful co-host of this damn show chris enjoy only best to you chris fuck around and find out best to you out there in the podcast universe how the hell are you thanks for joining us
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Chapter 2: What happened during the recent eclipse and how did people react?
You know, I know this is going to be this will be like out. We're going to air this maybe a week after it actually happened, maybe even longer. But the eclipse was just recently. And that got me all excited. Eclipse mania. Yes. The same way helping my son's homework gets me excited. I don't care. I don't care. No one cares. It's an eclipse. Didn't we just see an eclipse like three years ago?
Why part two? Was it that long ago? It was in 2017?
Chapter 3: What are the funny and bizarre NextDoor posts about the eclipse?
I thought I had children when the last eclipse happened.
no i thought i had less children i don't know i thought i had more children than i actually had that's crazy but of course i was here i was watching the news coverage wall-to-wall news coverage on every fucking channel of the eclipse everywhere yeah i get it it's exciting you know the the universe doing a little peekaboo for us a magic trick yeah it was kind of uh it was kind of eerie kind of spooky for a minute
It was. I mean, I know that half the country experienced this, so I'm telling them something. And they probably experienced some of them experiencing in totality. So it was different than what we experienced. Even the smallest amount of sunlight still is very bright outside. It's not like it went dark like I saw on TV some other places.
But it does turn like this weird 3D color outside and the shadows start moving. It doesn't look like you're looking in like a weird 3D glasses or something. The kids were totally freaked out running around because we had to explain to them as on the way out the door to school, which they got out before the eclipse.
I was going to say, because I heard that the school was like canceled. for some because they don't want kids to go blind.
It's just too much of a temptation. You can tell kids all day long, don't look at the sun.
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Chapter 4: What makes the Dune popcorn buckets a controversial topic?
What's the one thing they're going to do is look at the sun. So I was telling my kids before I left, I had like, I don't know, like this scared straight dare moment where I was like, you know, just say no to staring at the sun. Like, don't do that. You can set on fire. Your eyes can set on fire. And so when one of my kids got home, she was literally so scared of the eclipse.
She was like hiding behind the couch. I said, it's okay. You can come out and look outside. We're not going to go out there. And we didn't have the glasses and all that stuff. We figured just best, you know, safety first, Chrissy, basically around this household.
Right. That's always the thing.
Safety first, budgeting last.
Chapter 5: How do men behave in disgusting ways related to the Dune popcorn bucket?
That's the rule around this household. And so I was telling the children, it's okay. You don't have to worry about it. Don't freak out about it. We'll watch it on the television and we can see outside.
That's the thing. You could just see it all over the TV.
Yeah, and it just didn't work. I have permanently scarred my children for life. And then my wife, who is a rather intelligent human being, or I wouldn't have married her, says, well, you know, I'm really scared about the children looking at the sun today because of the eclipse. And I said, well, don't worry about it.
I had a little pep talk, more like a scared straight talk with them about them setting on fire if they should look at the sun. So I'm sure they probably don't want to go outside anymore. And she goes, yeah, I mean, it's so dangerous to look out today. You know, any other day...
Chapter 6: What illegal advice does Bryan give during the episode?
If you peek at the sun, I go, Astrid, what are you talking about? And she goes, well, any other day you can look at the sun. And I was like, you can't look at the sun ever. There's no day upon which you can look at the sun. Did you not know that? And she's like, well, I've looked at the sun before. And I'm like, who are you, Donald Trump? You can't look at the sun. You can't do that.
You can't ever look at the sun. Don't stare at the sun. Isn't that the rule? Well, you can take a little peek. A little peeky-boo is okay.
Yeah, like see where it is in the sky.
Chapter 7: What gross experiences did the hosts have in theaters?
Do kind of get a directional thing about it. But yeah, well, the reason you can't really like stare at it with the eclipse is because you can stare at it. Because you can. Like normally you kind of have to look away. It's too bright.
When the totality happens, were they allowed to look at the sun? Because I saw a lot of people on television without glasses staring at the totality.
No, no, no.
I thought that was the whole thing. It's like, make sure you keep your glasses on the entire time because those solar rays can still hit you in the eyeballs. Unbelievable. I'm so old that I talk about the weather all day long. And I still have people around me that don't know that staring at the sun is not a good thing.
But then I remember that guy in India who's been eating sun, stargazing, sun gazing. Yeah.
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Chapter 8: How does Bryan's encounter with a possum unfold?
300 years, and he's still alive.
But did you notice that we have those eclipses every year and a half? Yeah. We just don't see them because they happen out over the ocean.
Well, yeah, they happen over the ocean. They're constantly happening around the world. It's just, did it happen and affect so many people?
For us in the U.S., to go straight across.
Yeah, what a big fucking to-do everybody made. I mean, I understand.
There were Eclipse parties and Eclipse playlists and foods.
They had some big party they planned down in Texas, some huge music festival or something. And then Greg Abbott set up like a stop all the immigrants from coming place right where they were going to have it. So they had to move it. And then there was bad weather, so they had to cancel it. And then some people had bought camping sites and they showed up and it was like the Fyre Festival event.
actual fire it was like so fucked up the best laid plans you know what I'm saying but you know where all the action was happening where all the action was happening a good eclipse information you could only get from next door so let's see let's go back to the past let's go into the future back to the past and see what the people on next door are saying about what were they thinking I don't think they were thinking
I don't think they were thinking. All right. So one person says, does anybody know where a good spot might be to look at the eclipse? I have a big space in my yard where I can see the sun at that time, but I figured getting higher would make for a better look. Getting how high do you think you're going to get? Like getting higher? What are you talking about?
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