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The Dan Le Batard Show with Stugotz

The Big Suey: David Samson Steals a Bike (feat. David Samson)

13 Nov 2025

Transcription

Chapter 1: What fantasy football stresses are discussed at the beginning?

0.672 - 27.343 Unknown

Coming off a losing fantasy week, that means you're one week closer to losing your league. That's stressful, which can lead to nighttime teeth grinding. Dentek wants to prevent teeth grinding and has raised the fantasy stakes with a once-in-a-lifetime punishment. Keep an eye out for the ultimate fantasy football punishment reveal at the NFL Pro Bowl. or on Dentek.com slash ultimate punishment.

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27.624 - 36.67 Unknown

If you're still feeling fantasy stress, try a Dentek nighttime dental guard to protect your teeth. Available at all major retailers.

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38.472 - 48.546 Chris Cody

All right, kicking things off with Smirnoff, the official vodka sponsor of the NFL and the number one vodka in the world. Chris Cody, you're here. Smirnoff! Wow, you're on the money with Smirnoff. Smirnoff!

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Chapter 2: How does David Samson express vulnerability during the episode?

48.566 - 60.683 Chris Cody

Chris, you know what goes great with Smirnoff? Smirnoff! Yes, but I'm really talking about the game day fit. The style's got to match the vibe. Smirnoff! All right, here's the deal. Game day is everything. And that's exactly why your fit has to match the occasion. Smirnoff!

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60.663 - 72.296 Chris Cody

Starting this December, Smirnoff is giving fans 21 and over the chance to score limited edition Smirnoff commission merchandise from some of today's top creators, including Kayla Jones, Gavin Matthew, and Alaylee May.

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Chapter 3: What personal challenges does David Samson share?

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72.737 - 85.352 Chris Cody

Here's the kicker. One lucky fan will take home the grand prize, a trip to the biggest game of the offseason. Plus, one fan will win Alaylee May's one-of-one game day jacket. Wow. The merch will be dropped on select dates from December to January 21, and it's all courtesy of what brand?

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86.228 - 105.195 Chris Cody

That's right, Chris. Fans 21 and over can head to Smirnoff Socials to learn how to sign up. And don't forget to grab a bottle of Smirnoff vodka, number 21, at your local retail. Smirnoff. Please drink responsibly. Smirnoff. Number 21 vodka distilled from grain, 40% alcohol by volume. The Smirnoff Company, New York, New York. Please do not share with anybody under legal drinking age. Smirnoff.

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105.215 - 105.916 Chris Cody

No purchase necessary.

Chapter 4: How does the conversation shift to humor and light-hearted moments?

105.956 - 114.868 Chris Cody

Must be legal. U.S. resident, 21 or older. Sweepstake starts 12-15-2025 at 12 a.m. Eastern and ends 1-23-2026 at 11-59-59 p.m. Eastern. See official rules at program website.

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115.726 - 123.8 Mike Ryan

Mike, you know I have one rule to live by, right? Don't place parlays on multiple long shots. Don't say a game is won when it hasn't hit triple zero.

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124.641 - 131.192 Unknown

Always drink your JƤgermeister ice cold. That's the rule. Everything else is merely a suggestion. Everything else? Everything else.

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Chapter 5: What insights does David provide about love and family dynamics?

131.653 - 138.645 Unknown

Wearing clean underwear every day? Well, that's just a personal decision. Brushing your teeth? Obviously smart, but not a rule.

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138.625 - 140.569 Mike Ryan

Never pee-pee on an electric fence.

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140.809 - 150.328 Unknown

Okay, maybe there are two rules, but the one that is 100% that I insist on completely, Jagermeister, must be drank ice cold. Or don't drink it at all. Damn, that's cold.

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150.348 - 159.807 Mike Ryan

Exactly. You're finally starting to get it. Drink responsibly. Jagermeister liqueur, 35% alcohol by volume, imported by Mass Jagermeister U.S., White Plains, New York.

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163.55 - 172.782 Unknown

Welcome to the Big Sui, presented by DraftKings. Why are you listening to this show? The podcast that seems very similar to the other Dan Lebitard podcast.

Chapter 6: How does the discussion address the impact of grief on relationships?

172.802 - 186.42 Dan Le Batard

I'm sorry, I'm not going to apologize for that. In fact, the only difference seems to be this imaging. I have been tempted in restaurants just walking past tables to grab somebody's fries if they're just there. That hasn't happened to you guys? I've done it.

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187.081 - 197.619 Unknown

And now, here's the marching man to nowhere, fat face, and the habitual liar. This episode of the Dan Levitar Show is presented by DraftKings. DraftKings, the crown is yours.

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198.24 - 212.659 Dan Le Batard

So I really don't know, even though I am talking to David Sampson where and when the time permits, I really don't know how he is doing what he is presently doing, which is a daily show.

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212.639 - 225.798 Dan Le Batard

that is three times a week now, but is normally daily as he manages some stuff at home that has been really profoundly difficult, some of the worst pain that I can't imagine much worse pain than what it is that he's presently going through.

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Chapter 7: What is the story behind David's bike incident?

226.279 - 246.147 Dan Le Batard

I assume that he's still working because he's duty-bound, he's responsible, and because there are parts of this that he enjoys. He has now shaved his head in solidarity with his daughter and his family, And Zaslow asked me a question. I didn't know how to answer it, even though I've known you for 20 years and I could generally feel pretty confident answering these questions.

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246.167 - 268.296 Dan Le Batard

He's like, can we say who David looks like now? Is that insensitive? Is it insensitive to say who in arts or entertainment David looks like now that he's got this this big gray beard and that he's shaven? And I would assume that you'd be OK with that. But he didn't want to be indelicate over something that was so family personal as you shaving your head off.

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268.276 - 271.263 Dan Le Batard

To show everyone, really, that you're in pain with your daughter.

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271.724 - 286.2 David Samson

Zaz, go ahead. I don't I don't recognize what I look like. So to me, I don't look like anybody. But if you've got a doppelganger out there that you would like to advance the show with past Dan's ridiculous takes on Will Chamberlain, please feel free.

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286.18 - 287.782 Unknown

You don't think Will could hit some threes?

288.022 - 307.201 David Samson

I just think that Dan misled a fraction of the audience into saying that all he did was dunk because he was bigger than everyone else. Will Chamberlain had an entire, not only did he have a great mid-range game, and I mean, I don't know where you were here with telling Dan, unless part of the rules are now at Metal Ark, that we can't say anything bad to Dan.

307.722 - 310.905 David Samson

But that was just an irresponsible statement, Dan.

310.885 - 315.853 Dan Le Batard

They threw it to Roy. Look, Wilt Chamberlain, his game was limited.

Chapter 8: What reflections does David have on mortality and vulnerability?

315.874 - 333.163 Dan Le Batard

He was bigger and stronger and more athletic than everyone else. And therefore, he would say, what are you looking at me like? I don't know what I'm talking about. He's a great passer. He was bigger. He was somebody for his time who was more athletically gifted in size, strength, and mobility than everyone he was playing against.

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333.143 - 335.166 Stugatz

You could say that even today.

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335.406 - 336.067 Dan Le Batard

That's not Jokic.

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336.087 - 336.868 Stugatz

He's one of the most athletic.

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336.888 - 346.081 Dan Le Batard

That's not what Jokic is. That's not what I'm watching when I'm watching Jokic. The reason Wilt Chamberlain shot that percentage from the field is because he was playing a whole bunch of people who got stuck in his armpit.

346.101 - 366.168 David Samson

So I understand that you're going to double down on that. But if you go back to what made Wilt Chamberlain fantastic, there was a guy who played for Boston. I mean, I can't think of who he was. I think he wore number six, but it's escaping me. William Russell? William Russell, that's the guy, I mean, with all the titles that Boston won.

366.569 - 391.876 David Samson

So it's not as though that Wilt was able to carry the Lakers to this, as you know, all of these great things. I just took offense to the fact that you would sully Wilt Chamberlain when, in fact, what we witnessed during that season when he was shooting 72%, the things that he was doing, we've never seen since Jordan, LeBron, Kareem, Jokic. Don't get none of them.

392.016 - 413.189 Unknown

David, number one, I look like, well, I found you unrecognizable when I saw your show on Monday. That's not insults. Just I was like, I was shocked. I did not recognize you. But I think you look like Obadiah Stane from Iron Man. Oh, I think you look like Jeff Bridges character, the main villain in the first Iron Man movie. I think you'll just like him.

413.209 - 434.978 David Samson

Well, that's just bald with a beard. Yeah, that's right. It's a key component. Let me give you the background just so I'm not hiding anything. The reason for the beard is not because I want to grow hair on my face because I don't have it on my head. It's that I shave on Sundays and I shaved on September the 6th, which is the Sunday going into Monday, September 7th.

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