How Do I Convince My Sister to Leave Her Husband?
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How do I tell my sister that I don't think her husband is right for her?
That is some thin ice, Sister Veronica.
Yes.
So let me ask you, what's your ultimate goal for like a big conversation? You want to leave him? what up what's going on this is john of the dr john deloney show taking your calls on your marriages and your life and your brothers and sisters and kids and mental and emotional health whatever you got going on in your life i don't know very much but i know i can sit down with hurting people and listen and just show up and we can together figure out what's the next right step i've been doing this for over two decades and it's one of my great honors when somebody calls and says hey um The lights have gone out, and I need a little bit of someone to hold a candle up so I can figure out what's the next right move. If that's you, give me a buzz at 1-844-693-3291 or go to johndeloney.com slash ask. Real people going through real challenges all over the planet. It means the world to me if you will take one second, hit the subscribe button or the –
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So I'll just get right into it. Um, my question for you is how do I tell my sister that I don't think her husband is right for her?
That is some thin ice sister, Veronica.
Yes.
Um, so tell me what's going on.
So I'll give you a little backstory. Um, My sister has been with her husband since high school. I've known him for quite some time as well. We were all friends in high school and then beyond. But whenever they got engaged and then married, I felt like his true colors started to come out. What does that mean? So he started... in my opinion, to get really manipulative emotionally with my sister. Just different things that she would want. He would always find some way to say that, like convince her that she didn't want them. A small example in the past was she wanted this certain type of dog that she had growing up. And he said, no, we can't have a dog right now. We don't have a big enough house. And then turned around and convinced her to get a mastiff, which is a really large dog.
And that's just a little thing. But things like that over the years have piled up. And I feel like it's just getting worse and worse and worse.
Yeah. Tell me about your sister.
So she's a really kind and caring person. She is the oldest of the three of us. So she's got that big sister energy about her. She has always gone to bat for me and my younger sister. She's also been like a guiding light for us, but her friends. as well. She works as a nurse. She's very caring and she's a very devoted mother to her two children. And I feel like she stretches herself thin for everyone in her life and doesn't always get a lot in return, which is hard to see.
Yes. And that's your entry point.
Mm-hmm.
I would be very careful. Unless you are witnessing violence or you're witnessing abuse, then, of course, I'm going to throw myself right in the middle of it to protect people, right? If there's just a continued, this guy sucks. He's just lame. I don't like him. I want people to be careful. I want you to be careful about talking about how bad he is. Because here's the thing. If she stays... if she stays with him, then you have driven a wedge between you two.
Yes.
And you're making her choose between this guy and her sister. Don't put her in that situation. The approach is, hey, I think you're worth more than the life you have right now. And I don't know if you can see it. And you're smart and wise and beautiful. And maybe you're choosing this. But as your little sister, I just want to tell you, I love you. And I see so much more. Like, what do you mean?
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