Off the Record With Will Guidara
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What is the big idea behind “unreasonable hospitality” and how does it relate to marriage?
When it comes to the things you would do in restaurants, they were big and and sometimes spectacular. But the things that have always caught my attention were the teeny tiny little things. They will tell that story for the rest of their life. When I talk to couples and they're thinking about rebuilding their marriage, they're reimagining it. They got two kids all of a sudden and they're married, they're different people, their marriage is different. And they think in terms of Super Bowl.
Years ago when I was getting married, the best piece of advice I got was
What up, what up? Welcome to Off the Record. Dude, I'm so glad you showed up on a Saturday morning, whenever this show dropped, or whenever you happen to be getting it in your feed. This is when I sit down with some of my favorite people in the world, folks I've never met, but I'm fascinated by, or experts on a topic that I am desperate personally to learn more about. And I know y'all are too. Today's guest is literally one of the greatest people on the planet. And I don't say that lightly. Um He wrote a book called Unreasonable Hospitality that has can had a second, a third, and fourth life. Um, he was one of the creators of the show, The Bear. Um, he's also a great friend and one of the greatest human beings ever, just behind closed doors.
His name is Will Gadera. You've seen him everywhere. Um, he is was originally known as being w I think the only. uh restaurant in the United States to win the restaurant of the globe, right? The the number one restaurant in the world twice. And he did it through Unreasonable hospitality. They had amazing food, amazing service, amazing whatever, but they took it the next level and said, we're gonna give people an experience that they'll never forget. And what's beautiful about Will is that's how he lives his life. That's how he treats just his buddies. That's I I've been on the road with him. We've we've done events together. I've uh shared meals with him. That's how he treats everyone. And it's such an impact to me.
So I had him on the show. He's got a new field guy. Like the how to implement unreasonable hospitality in your life and in your home. And we spent a ton of time in this episode. One of, man, one of my favorite conversations. I left a different man after having this conversation with Will about how. We can be people that are spouses, that are kids, that are neighbors. exhale when they think about us? How do we shift that pendulum and become unreasonably hospitable to those around us so we can share kindness, grace, love, and also Get stuff done. So buckle up or un you know what? Unbuckle. This is an unbuckle conversation. This isn't a buckle up. Enjoy my conversation with one of the greatest men in the world, Will Gadera.
Here's the big picture question and I wanna drill down into some like specifics. Um Your restaurant. is super successful and it becomes number one in the world once and then becomes number one twice. And then you've got this reputation of hospitality that's just maddening, right? Mm not maddening, it's um extraordinary. Yeah. It's uh over the top. He write this book that it goes on to become a phenomenon. And Now you're helping businesses all across the the world, literally, like reimagine how they love and serve their customers. Ever since I met you just as a person and then we've hung out and then I read your book and always thought to myself This is how my home needs to feel too. And if I if I as a guy who has a bunch of small businesses that I'm a part of,
How dare I think about my customers, the people I'm trying to help? More so than my wife or than my kids or than my parents. Yes. What a weird energy swap. And so how The it the inertia to push through that and say, Why does my wife get my thirds and fourths and fifths and the people I'm trying to help get my first and my seconds? Right. That's been a two or three year slog through literature, through all therapy, through all sorts, like, how did we all get here to where the people closest to us get our get the least of us, right?
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Chapters
8 chapters
1
What is the big idea behind “unreasonable hospitality” and how does it relate to marriage?
0:05–11:00
2
How can the tiny, everyday gestures that create memorable experiences be used in a marriage?
11:00–19:59
3
Why do Will and John suggest scheduling intentional “check‑ins” with your spouse?
19:59–29:09
4
What micro‑habits and systems help couples stay connected amid busy lives?
29:09–38:17
5
How does creating a “gracious impulse” habit improve love and generosity at home?
38:17–47:44
6
What role do shared rituals—like movie mornings or surprise gifts—play in strengthening relationships?
47:44–56:12
7
How can couples turn big celebrations into everyday acts of kindness without feeling forced?
56:12–1:03:43
8
What final challenge does the episode give listeners to keep their marriage vibrant?
1:03:43–1:04:17