Dating people you disagree with
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Why do people choose to date someone with different political or religious views?
Um, I mean who wants to date themselves or someone who's a carbon copy of yourself? I mean it'd be incredibly boring. Um but you know difference is is fun, it's novel, it's it's exciting. You can you can learn about a lot about um things just from someone having a completely different perspective to you or having a different outlook on life and that can that can be really interesting. It kind of can expand your horizon. So I think differences I'm good in a relationship. I I never think that differences are a problem. I think it's the way we manage differences. That's where people kind of become unstuck.
The hookup Love and
honey on.
On Triple J.
Warning Sex and Adult Themes. Hey Sarah McVee joining you for the hookup. Have you ever fallen for someone who you don't see eye to eye with on something big, on religion or politics or eating meat? When do you agree to disagree? And when is it a deal breaker? In this podcast, you'll hear from a Christian guy who let his faith get in the way of a great relationship, only to regret it. And Relationships Counselor Clinton Power will tell you how to make the differences work for you. First though, Catherine and Brandon are friends who used to be together despite disagreeing on loads of things. They're talking about how they made it work.
In the beginning anyway, we rarely fought at all. Yeah. I mean, I think even in the threes that we were together we um, you know, had very few fights to be honest, even though we had kind of Yeah, a few big fights. Yeah, yeah, a few big fights. Um but yeah, I mean I I think we did see eye to the eye. At least on the core things anyway, we um definitely had those same values and same kind of direction, ambitions that we wanted to go down. What
drew you to Catherine?
Um, I actually saw her one time getting an award and just thought, geez, that girl looks really cute. I want to get to know her and uh yeah, I did. So yeah, I mean that was the first thing, but also because like I just as I got to know her, you know, she was really intelligent and had huge respect for her and that kind of grew into something more as well. So yeah.
What was the award for?
Catherine.
Uh it was it was an academic award.
Yeah. Yeah, right. So just
just a high school academic award.
So you were drawn to her intelligence. And what about for you, Catherine?
Uh, I think uh the main thing that I really liked about Brandon when we first started talking was how respectful he was, how kind he was, and also how um I guess how much he like thought about things and considered other people's opinions and Yeah, that was that was the kind of the main thing. Thanks. Cute.
Um and did did this I mean, you've alluded to the fact that you were together for quite a few years. Did it grow serious fairly quickly?
I think probably more serious than we or quicker than we thought anyway. Yeah. Um I think we kind of I mean 'cause Catherine was coming off a relationship kind of you know, a couple of months after that.
What sparked the conversation about dating across ideological lines on Triple J?
Yeah. When
we got together. So I don't think she was looking for anything serious and I was just kind of taking it as it was. Um but then yeah, it got pretty serious probably maybe
Yeah, within like the first six months I'd say. Yeah. Pretty serious. Yeah, yeah.
So and then we obviously we sat together for another two and a half years. So it was serious enough anyway.
Obviously we are talking about difference of opinions and on the text line someone says I dumped a guy because his company supports a darnie. which is uh the company that wants to start a big coal mine in Queensland, for those who don't know. Um, when did you guys figure out that there were things that you didn't agree on?
Uh I think it was pretty gradual. Like things would come up on the news or come up in just everyday conversation and I'd sort of express an opinion or he'd an i he'd express his opinion and then the other person would kind of be like, Hm actually don't agree with that and uh sometimes it was just kind of oh like I disagree and it was left at that but other times it sort of developed into
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Chapters
6 chapters
1
Why do people choose to date someone with different political or religious views?
0:00–2:59
2
What sparked the conversation about dating across ideological lines on Triple J?
2:59–6:50
3
How did Catherine and Brandon meet and why did they decide to give a relationship a chance?
6:50–13:28
4
What were the first major points of disagreement between Catherine and Brandon?
13:28–19:10
5
How did they learn to manage arguments without letting them end the relationship?
19:10–25:38
6
What expert advice did relationship counselor Clinton Power give about handling differences?
25:38–29:08