Unicorn hunting
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What is “unicorn hunting” and why is it becoming so popular?
Yeah. Don't assume that any bisexual woman or femme presenting person is okay or interested in that. And don't assume that by announcing bisexual as an orientation means that's an invitation to start discussing the kind of sex you're gonna have with that person.
Warning, adult content. The hookup, love and on Triple J. Have you ever had a threesome? Maybe you and your partner are a bit curious about it. Maybe even taking steps to find a third. Well for a large proportion of heterosexual couples, a bisexual woman is considered the perfect third. RAERE. A unicorn, if you will. But sometimes when couples start to search for that unicorn to play with, it can become a weird and objectifying hunt. I'm Nat Tencich, and this week I caught up with Lindell from Newcastle. She's a unicorn who said that the life isn't always as flattering as you might think.
I'm just trying to think, generally it's you know, you'll be on a dating app and if you mention to um a guy that you're attracted to whatever gender, they will often just say, Oh, do you wanna fuck me and my my hot friend? Um, so often it'll also you'll also sort of have single guys that will get excited about that and will want to find their friend that they'll also want want you to have sex with. Um but then there's also particular apps, so there's the app Field, uh, which I think used to be called uh Thrinder, which was short for like threesomes for Tinder, uh, and then they changed their name. And that is pretty much universally it is just couples looking for a third.
And so you spent a bit of time on there and that's kinda how you fell more into this world?
Yeah, I guess so. That was w if you're going there, you're more actively seeking something out. Uh I I wouldn't say that I was, you know, on there pretty regularly, was sort of, you know, occasionally have a look on there, see who I'd match up with, but Anytime you would go on there you would have so many matches and it's I think people basically because you're a bit of a rarity, they'll just s swipe on anything hoping to get a match with you and will sort of pounce on you when you do match with them. So when you do match with them, what are your interactions like? So although it's a a profile for a couple, it is almost universally the man in the couple who is messaging you. And the very frustrating thing that will happen is that they will say, uh you'll be messaging them and you'll seem to have similar interests, uh, and they'll be sound really keen to meet up, and you know, after a couple of days then they'll just sort of say, Oh, actually.
I talked to my girlfriend and yeah, she's actually not interested. And one instance was a guy saying, oh, I've just shown you a picture to my girlfriend. She actually prefers petite blondes. I am clearly not either of those things if you actually look at my picture and it's like, well, we probably could have saved ourselves a lot of time. Maybe talk to your partner about what they actually are looking for as
well. Well why do you think guys are the ones who lead the charge in these interactions?
I think it's a couple of things. I think ma mainly it's because it's this ultimate male fantasy of having two women. Male's straight fantasy. So they're the ones that I've I've never actually asked any couples, you know, who was the first person that brought this up that this would be something you'd be interested in. But I'm always a little bit suspicious that it is the man in the couple that has brought it up and maybe the woman in the couple is uh very y maybe she's a bit bicurious to use a phrase, uh, and so she's open to it, but the man will basically lead the charge.
So how does it make you feel um when you're interacted with that way?
You would think that it would be very flattering, but it often isn't. And you often just sort of feel like Uh not a commodity, but that The fact that you have said, This is a thing that I'm interested in means that I am definitely going to have sex with you and I am definitely going to play along with all the fantasy you have in your head and and I think for a I think for a lot of
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Chapters
8 chapters
1
What is “unicorn hunting” and why is it becoming so popular?
0:01–6:01
2
How do dating apps and “unicorn” platforms influence the search for a third?
6:01–10:28
3
What are the common pitfalls and emotional impacts for unicorns?
10:28–15:16
4
How can couples communicate ethically when seeking a third partner?
15:16–20:03
5
What practical tips do therapists recommend for setting boundaries and consent?
20:03–24:06
6
How do real‑world experiences illustrate successful (or failed) unicorn encounters?
24:06–28:41
7
What community resources and support networks exist for bisexual/unicorn individuals?
28:41–32:26
8
What final advice do guests give for maintaining healthy, consensual threesomes?
32:26–36:01