Anuki Amarakoon: Casual Sex Might Boost Your Confidence - January 27, 2026
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What is the main topic discussed in this episode?
Please be advised that the following program contains audio content that may be graphic and potentially triggering for some listeners. This content may include descriptions or sounds that some may find disturbing. Listener discretion is strongly advised. This is The Last Show with David Cooper. For years, you might have been told that casual sex is somehow bad for you, but there's new research on single adults that say it might actually boost your confidence, happiness, and your desire.
What does recent research say about casual sex and confidence?
So, the question, is no-strings-attached sex getting an unfair reputation? That is what we're going to explore here with clinical psychology researcher at the Sexuality and Well-Being Lab at the University of British Columbia, Anuki Amerikun. Anuki, welcome to the show.
I'm so happy to be here.
So there are some, like, negative stereotypes, perhaps unfair ones that get thrown around casual sex, that it's risky maybe for your sexual health, maybe emotionally.
Are there negative stereotypes associated with casual sex?
What made you want to sort of look at this question? Is casual sex a bad thing?
Well, I think, you know, the population of singles is increasing over time. And... there's this general sense that single people are having casual sex. Like if we think about sex in the city or friends, there's this portrayal of an abundance of sexual opportunities. But when we actually look at the research, most of the research on partnered sex has looked at couples. So we don't actually know a lot about how many singles are actually having casual sex, what these relationships look like. And how they're being experienced by single people.
What characteristics define casual sexual relationships?
So I wanted to look at just that. So what is the frequency in the population that people are having casual sex? What are the characteristics of these relationships? And are there certain factors that differentiate people, single people who have casual sex versus people that don't? Specifically in terms of attachment, how the overall sense that people have in terms of their evaluation of being single and their well-being. Do these two groups differ in those categories?
Interesting. I think the scene that gets painted in like the show Sex and the City is you meet someone on a night out, you have a great night together. In the morning, you say, hey, you want a cup of coffee?
How do casual sexual relationships differ from romantic ones?
The answer might be yes. And after that, they're gone. They're a stranger. They're in your life. They're no longer in your life. Is that the scene that plays out for most single people? Or do things in practice with the people you've spoken to play out a little differently?
Well, the term casual sexual relationship just captures things sexual activity outside of a romantic relationship. So it's a really big umbrella term.
What did the studies reveal about emotional closeness in casual sex?
And we know from previous research that there's actually a lot of variability in what those relationships look like. Some of them vary in how well the partners know each other, whether the relationship is sexually exclusive or not, how often people see each other. So there's a lot of variability. In our study, what we found was that on average, these relationships were low in emotional closeness. They weren't really that sexually exclusive. And people weren't really interested in making that sexual relationship transition into a romantic relationship. So they were closer to what you described of just, you know, a one-off or someone you don't really know that well, but you do see sometimes.
But closeness in that setup, in that kind of relationship, is that something you see? There's this popular idea that casual sex is about keeping someone at arm's length. Does your study kind of challenge that perception?
How does engaging in casual sex affect self-perception and satisfaction?
I wouldn't say that it challenges that perception that the relationships are emotionally close, but there is a tendency on average within these relationships for folks to have more than a few contacts. So on average, like two to three contacts, sexual contacts and social contacts, but the emotional closeness remains low.
Got it. And so who are these contacts? Are they strangers they're matching with on apps? Are they friends? Are they exes?
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Chapters
8 chapters
1
What is the main topic discussed in this episode?
0:04–0:39
2
What does recent research say about casual sex and confidence?
0:39–1:08
3
Are there negative stereotypes associated with casual sex?
1:08–1:54
4
What characteristics define casual sexual relationships?
1:54–2:34
5
How do casual sexual relationships differ from romantic ones?
2:34–3:00
6
What did the studies reveal about emotional closeness in casual sex?
3:00–3:56
7
How does engaging in casual sex affect self-perception and satisfaction?
3:56–4:41
8
What are the common misconceptions about casual sex and well-being?
4:41–10:11
Speakers
3 identifiedMore from The Last Show with David Cooper
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