Asking My Husband Questions Women Are Too Scared to Ask
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What is the main topic discussed in this episode?
Today on the Liz Moody Podcast, my husband Zach and I are answering your most taboo, hard to talk about relationship and dating questions. Like the questions that you feel a little bit of shame, a little bit of embarrassment, even talking about with your partner or with the person that you're dating or interested in. These are all very real questions that you sent in. And this is part of my new series where I ask my real life relationships to come and weigh in on your biggest struggles. So like I have my mother-in-law come and talk through your trickiest or most taboo mother-in-law issues, or I'll have my friend with a kid come and talk through your questions that you send in for friendship issues for different life phases.
So today it's all about your trickiest dating and relationship issues. We've got dry spells. We've got in-laws. We've got prenups. We've got work crushes. We've got all the taboo stuff in here. It's really important to me to take the taboo out of these topics, to bring them out into the open, into the light, and hopefully to share a lot of tips, a lot of personal stories, things that we're really going through that can help you guys either in action or just to feel less alone. Welcome to the Liz Moody Podcast, where we believe that there is always something that you can do to create a life that feels amazing, and we help you figure out how to find the lever to pull at any moment to actually do that.
Zach, welcome to the podcast.
Thanks for having me.
Okay, let's just jump in with this one. I don't know how to discuss finances with my husband. He will not share his expenses, his salary, anything about his financial life. What should I do?
I mean, he's probably a secret agent and... He's not cleared.
He's in the CIA.
Leave him alone. He's not cleared to give you that information. And just let it be.
I think it's a huge red flag.
Huge red flag.
Huge red flag. Honestly, even if he's a secret agent, that's kind of a red flag because I don't know if you want to be married to a secret agent. That's really stressful. We've seen all the movies. Like there's a good chance somebody is going to show up at your door.
It's a personal call for sure.
And murder you in the middle of the night.
Anyway, yeah, I mean, I think that's like a funky thing to do, especially like the full firewall for the whole thing.
Not knowing their salary.
Well, even like the salary is one thing, but like the salary is one thing. All together, it's very big. And each individual part is its own kind of like... Problem. Yeah. I think what would be really interesting is to then like get that information and be like, oh, but everything was normal. They made like a normal salary and had normal expenses and like everything was normal because I don't feel like that's going to be the case.
How would you suggest that she broached this conversation in a way that he might be more receptive to?
Maybe... by trying to create a joint budget and trying to figure out what the two of you can reasonably expect to contribute to said joint budget. Like you must have shared costs. So like who's paying rent every month? Are you splitting it? Are you splitting?
What percentage of your income for each of you is that right?
Yeah. And so like when trying to plan a vacation or plan a major life event, anything else like that, like I think it's good to know where that money was. Boyfriend or husband?
Husband.
Yeah. I think there's a place in your relationship that sharing money can be something you don't really want to participate in. And it's it stops before marriage, I would think.
Oh, OK. We will get back to that. But when do you think is the right time to talk about money in a relationship?
to just talk about money generally.
Like to say, hey, what's your salary? Do you have any student loans? What are your financial goals and dreams? When do you think that moment is in a relationship?
I don't think there's like an absolute answer, but I would say as soon as you're trying to plan seriously with somebody, unless you have really specific requirements.
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Chapters
5 chapters
1
What is the main topic discussed in this episode?
0:00–5:07
2
How should I bring up finances when my partner refuses to share salary or expenses?
5:07–9:51
3
When is the right time to discuss money, debt, and financial goals in dating?
9:51–26:08
4
How can I believe my partner when they tell me I’m beautiful as I age?
26:08–31:01
5
What practical steps help overcome body insecurity and internalized beauty standards?
31:01–37:12
Speakers
2 identifiedMore from The Liz Moody Podcast
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