The Mel Robbins Podcast
The Exact Words You Need to Hear Today If It Feels Like Nothing’s Working
13 Nov 2025
Chapter 1: What is the main topic discussed in this episode?
Hey, it's your friend Mel, and welcome to the Mel Robbins Podcast.
Chapter 2: What does it mean when the world feels overwhelming?
Have you ever had one of those days where the world, it just feels like too much? Whether it's the news that's depressing, or there's just so much going on at work, or your life is so overwhelming, and you just are not sure how you're even going to get through the day. But then all of a sudden,
Out of nowhere, you crack open a book and you read a passage or you hear a song playing or you see a quote online and it just, boom, drops into your day like an anchor.
Chapter 3: How can a simple quote or song change your perspective?
Cuts right through all the noise of the world and the headlines and it lands square in your heart. And suddenly, you can't explain it, but you just feel a little bit better. It's almost as if that passage that you read or that song that you heard was meant just for you at this moment. Your shoulders drop. You can breathe again. You feel a little better.
Well, I believe that this episode is going to do exactly that for you. That it was meant to find you at this moment in your life. that it's going to cut through the noise of the world and land deep in your heart. That's the magic of my guest today, Mark Nepo.
He's the number one New York Times bestselling author of the seminal work, The Book of Awakening, which has changed millions of people's lives, including mine and my husband, Chris. This book is so important to me. It sits on my bedside table. I read it several days a week. And Mark's writings are so important to me. They have shown up for me time and time again, exactly when I needed them most.
So I am absolutely thrilled for him to be here for you and me. And wherever it is that you are at this exact moment, I promise you the sound of Mark's words, they are meant to find you. The rhythm, the poetry, there's something that you're about to hear that's going to touch something deep inside you. It's like being moved by a song, even if you don't know all the words yet.
All you have to do is listen. And the priceless life wisdom that Mark Nepo is about to share, it'll do the rest. Hey, it's your friend Mel, and welcome to the Mel Robbins Podcast.
It is such an honor to be together and to spend this time with you, and if you're a new listener or you're here because someone shared this episode with you, I just want to personally welcome you to the Mel Robbins Podcast family. You're about to meet a man whose words have lifted me up more times than I can count, and I guarantee he is going to do exactly the same thing for you today.
Mark Nepo is the number one New York Times bestselling author of The Book of Awakening, which is one of my favorite books. I give it as a gift. It sits on my nightstand. I love it because it has 365 daily meditations that you can read that help you grow as a human being. Be in the moment, live with more courage, deepen your relationships, and connect more deeply with life itself.
And I'm not the only one who loves Marx writing. My husband, Chris, has read from the Book of Awakening for the last 10 years, and so have millions of people around the world, because it's celebrating its 25th anniversary this year. Now, Mark has also published 25 other books, including his new bestselling book, The Fifth Season, Creativity in the Second Half of Life.
Mark Nepo received his PhD in English from the University of Albany, where he served for decades as a professor. But today, you and I are going to dig deep into the wisdom and the stories and the lessons from the book that has had one of the biggest impacts on my life.
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Chapter 4: What are the two questions that foster connection?
And I love that we are only getting started. There's so much more that we're going to dig into with Mark Nepo and my husband, Chris. But let's take a pause so we can hear from our amazing sponsors. And I also want to give you a chance to share this conversation with people in your life.
There's someone that you know and that you care about who needs this wisdom and this encouragement at this exact moment. So please take a moment and share this and don't go anywhere because we're going to be waiting for you after this short break. So stay with us. Welcome back. It's your friend Mel.
And today you and I are spending time with a man whose words have helped me and millions of others see the beauty in their lives and the world around them. Talking about the one and only Mark Nepo. He is here to do the same for you. And I am also joined by my husband, Chris. So Mark, my next question for you is,
Why do you think these simple things can act like such a lifeline or open you up when otherwise in life you kind of are going through life feeling very closed off and lonely?
Yeah, I think that one of the things I mentioned earlier, but it's really been a great teacher for me, is that great love and great suffering are the great openers.
and you know there's two ways that human beings will basically learn one is by willfully shedding and the other is by being broken open and if you don't willfully shed don't worry you'll be broken open and often it's a combination and so words and phrases and expressions that matter are expressed in those openings.
And therefore, whether it comes from me or you or a friend while you're struggling, those are the great openers. And then it's open. That's why it's important to have that heart space open. So when that comes, yes, a phrase, you know, I had a dear friend and mentor who lived to be 102, Joel Elkes. He was a child of the Holocaust. He was a doctor. He was a watercolorist.
I met him when he was 80 and thought, how much time do we have? And we And 22 years. And, you know, one sentence he said to me when I was just beginning years ago was such an opening for me. He said, you have a gift. Honor it and let it be your teacher. And, you know, at a time when I wasn't sure I had a gift, you know, that was such an opening for me that really has stayed with me my whole life.
What does that mean, you think? Like, can you unpack that a little bit? You have a gift. Yeah. Honor it and let it be your teacher. What is that? Because you also said everybody has a gift. Everybody has a gift. So how do you honor your gift and how do you let that gift be your teacher?
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Chapter 5: How do you find purpose and meaning in everyday life?
And so when we go back, more often than not, their original, or as close as we can get, their original definitions are more whole and so much more helpful. So honor, I love the original definition of the word honor. Honor means to keep what is true in view. I love that. To keep what is true in view. So for everyone who's with us and listening, how can you personalize the practice of honoring?
How do you keep what is true in view about what you know about yourself and your gifts? So I think that, you know, the first step for any of us is to, you know, the word trust literally means follow your heart. So to follow our hearts in a daily way, what brings you more alive? What is heartening?
Forget about whether it's a career or a project or just what do you do during the day that brings you more alive? And then do more of it. It could be staring at the sky, or it could be making meals for friends, or it could be stamp collecting, or it could be, you know, I have a dear friend, the friend Paul, who helped me through my cancer journey all those years ago.
And one of his great gifts, I mean, he did all kinds of things to make a living, but he followed so beautifully. You know, when we were in our 20s, he created an art gallery. And that brought him alive. And it was a wonderful art gallery in Albany, New York. And then it changed. And, you know, the next thing I knew he was, you know, doing Sumi painting himself.
And then, you know, another 10 years, he was apprenticing with a foreign car mechanic. And he just followed what brought him. And it wasn't whether it was, quote, successful or not. It was just that what brought him alive shifted. I wouldn't even see, as long as we take the judgment out of it, not no longer works or didn't produce something.
So, you know, one of the things that happens to all of us when we're young, you're spinning in recess and this teacher says, boy, you're so graceful. You'd be a good dancer. Or hear somebody singing la la la over in the corner. You should be a singer. And now all of a sudden, it gets in our heads from society and from, okay, what do I have to do to become a singer?
Does that mean I have to take lessons? Does that mean I have to get a record recorded? Do I have to perform or if singing brings you alive, whether you sing well or not, you're a singer. So how do we stay a verb and not become a noun? And this is at the heart of finding our own gift. You know, um,
I think it was Howard Thurman who said, we don't need people, oh, I can't remember the exact quote, but the essence of it was we need people who are alive, not people who are, quote, good at what they do, because if we're alive, we will be good at what we do.
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Chapter 6: What is the importance of admitting the truth in your life?
Well, one of the things that brings me alive is reading from your book, because I always drop in, and so I want to read one to you. And then I'd love to hear you kind of unpack this one. So this one is May 19th, and it's called The Bee Comes. The flower doesn't dream of the bee. It blossoms and the bee comes. Oof, why am I crying? Mark, damn you. Oof. Okay.
At times in my life, I have wanted love so badly that I have reimagined myself, reinvented who I am in an attempt to be more desirable or more deserving, only to discover again and again that it is the tending of my own soul that invites the natural process of love to begin. I remember my very first tumble into love.
I found such comfort there that like Narcissus, I became lost in how everything other than my pain was reflected in her beauty. All the while, I was abdicating my own worth, empowering her as the key to my sense of joy.
If I have learned anything through the years, it is that though we discover and experience joy with others, our capacity for joy is carried like a pot of nectar and our very own breast. I now believe that our deepest vocation is to root ourselves enough in this life that we can open our hearts to the light of experience and so bloom.
Chapter 7: What daily rituals can help ground you in overwhelming times?
For in blooming, we attract others. In being so thoroughly who we are, an inner fragrance is released that calls others to eat of our nectar. And we are loved by friends and partners alike. It seems the very job of being is to ready us for such love. By attending our own inner growth, we uncannily become exactly who we are.
And like the tulip whose blossom petal is the exact shape of the bee, our self-actualization attracts a host of loving others more real than all our fantasies. In this way, the universe continues through the unexpected coming together of blossomed souls." So if you can, give up the want of another and be who you are.
And more often than not, love will come at the precise moment you are simply loving yourself. It's so beautiful.
Oh, thank you. You read it beautifully.
And you also give a prompt that helps you take it deeper. You say, identify one trait that makes you feel good about who you are. Your laugh, your smile, your ability to listen, or the sound of your voice. Take a moment and give thanks for your small goodness and for the potential love of others. It's so beautiful. The next time you exhibit this goodness, notice how who you are affects others.
You know, what I get out of that, Mark, is how it's so easy to kind of trash yourself and chase outside validation. But not many of us stop and actually appreciate small traits that we can love about ourselves. These prompts have really helped me to slow down and to build this muscle where I just notice things that I admire about myself.
It sounds kind of cheesy, but learning how to see things within yourself that make you proud of the kind of person that you are. and really witnessing it, it does open up more feelings of appreciation and love and a sense of pride in who you are. And it's easy to look over these small things. We see it in other people, but I think it's a new skill to learn to see it in yourself.
So is that what you're trying to teach in that essay there, the importance of loving yourself and how to start doing it?
So one of the things about all my writing is that the flower doesn't dream of the bee, it blossoms and the bee comes. I didn't know that when I started that. And this is where over time I've discovered that the creative process and the introspective process are really the same thing. I just happen to write it down. And so there are so many lessons.
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Chapter 8: How does creativity evolve in the second half of life?
And I didn't know that. And then so now... That becomes my teacher. And so this is how we can give our hearts attention. And what comes by being real gives us clues to our own gifts.
And so one of the things that that reveals about a kind of like a law, if you will, of a spiritual law, you know, and this often we see this with first love, you know, where in high school you love me and which means you see something in me I haven't yet seen. And now, my God, and I think you've got the switch to my light. I can't let you out of my sight, which actually is very self-centered.
But nonetheless, I'm just like, oh my God, I'm head over heels. And what we learn over time is the greatest respectful gift we can give to someone who loves us is to own our own light. You saw it, but it's my switch. And I see it in you and it's your switch. And we have to honor that in each other.
And so this is one of the beautiful things is by being who we are, I mean, we do have to love ourselves first.
How, though, would you invite somebody who really wants to be more loving of themselves first and to find the switch?
So with all the things we're talking about, I would always try to come down to small steps. Okay. And so one is, can you identify and spend time with one thing you feel good about yourself?
Can you give me an example?
You're a good listener. You're a good storyteller. You're good at showing up when people need you. You're good at asking questions. You're good at finding the missing piece. You're good at, it could be a thousand things, but something little. And then to pay attention Not just that you feel good when you do it, but what is it opening in you? What's going on?
I always encourage people to use their own life as a case study. Just like DNA, everything's embedded. All of biology is embedded in DNA. Well, in our heart, when we touch something real, all of humanity is embedded in there. And so if I am good at listening to a friend, what does that tell me about my gift of listening? How do I then listen to myself?
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