how it feels to be fat
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What does it mean to be comfortable with a larger body?
This is what it looks like to glow down. This is what it looks like to treat your body with disrespect for a full year. And now you're finally realizing, man, I have subscribed to the Chud Lifestyle. Which is so funny. I think that word also is being misused to just mean like someone who's fat and likes to uh eat fast food every day. I think it has a completely different meaning. So look it up before you use it. Funny enough, I just used it and whatever. Um but no I I am like really, really embarrassed to be making this kind of video, but I know that this is the most real thing I can talk about at this moment because it is the only thing that's been on my mind for the past half a year. What does it mean to be fat?
We have had such a discourse in society over the past, I don't know, probably five, ten years about being fat. And what does it mean to love your body, appreciate your body? What does it mean to care for it? Should you go out of your way to make sure that you are in the best shape, even if it means not eating meals and not feeding yourself the Proper nutrients that you need. Should you completely go the opposite way and not worry about what you eat? Because at the end of the day, you're gonna be six feet under. Well. I think that what we've lost is the idea that it depends. It all depends, man. And what I can speak on is my experience, and that's what I'm gonna do today. And I'm going to tell you what's gonna happen in the next year.
So, first of all, why did I get here? Like, why am I sitting with uh extra weight on my body? I didn't used to look like this. This is what I used to look like look like, probably, I don't know, eight, ten years ago. Very, very different. I was very, very skinny. Um, actually a little bit too skinny. I remember I had one game in uh in high school. I was playing varsity soccer, I got called up as a sophomore because I was running. running super super fast in pre-training and they're like, this guy's gonna be good to give uh some of the other guys a a break. And because of this, I had my first ever experience where I was like trying to muscle the guy next to me while we were playing this like e exhibition game that meant nothing.
I'm trying to muscle this guy that's next to me. And he he was a senior. He was a big guy, big stocky guy. And I remember as I was bumping into him, he like stopped, looked at me, grabbed me, and just threw me into the net on a corner kick. It was physical feat that I ever experienced. And I was just like, what in the world is going on? I need to hit the weight room.
Why did I gain weight and how did my past fitness habits change?
Classic weight room thing. And so throughout my teenage years and throughout my young adult years, kind of leading into college, I was very good with keeping a consistent routine going to the gym. And the main reason behind that was one, I wanted to be strong for soccer, but the real reason was I wanted to have a girlfriend. And everyone knows as you're growing up that getting a girlfriend is about looks. At least when you're younger, you believe that. And so you do everything you can to make sure that your body is in good shape. It also didn't help that throughout my childhood I was pudgy. I had a little bit of extra weight on me. I wasn't lean. I wasn't, you know, I didn't have a six pack uh at age fourteen.
So I wasn't Snapchatting girls' pictures of my six pack, which is crazy that this is even a thing. But that is the reality of life. At least that was for a lot of us that had no internet um guidelines or understanding. But anyways, going back to like being being big, right? Um My reasoning for losing a bunch of weight and getting into shape was always dependent on other people and how other people would view me and how I would come across to other people. And I was so so lucky enough that about a year ago I fell in love with somebody. Actually, a year and a half ago, a little bit going on, two years, fell in love with someone and they accepted me for who I was. And this pressure of keeping up a certain kind of body image, keeping up a certain kind of weight, making sure that I was in good shape.
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Chapters
8 chapters
1
What does it mean to be comfortable with a larger body?
0:00–2:42
2
Why did I gain weight and how did my past fitness habits change?
2:42–6:00
3
How did a supportive relationship shift my focus from appearance to self‑acceptance?
6:00–8:16
4
What unhealthy habits replaced my workouts and how did they affect my emotions?
8:16–10:37
5
Why is prioritizing sleep and daily routines crucial for long‑term health?
10:37–13:03
6
How can small, consistent sacrifices create a snowball effect for better health?
13:03–15:10
7
What role does mindset play versus external pressure when trying to lose weight?
15:10–17:44
8
How can I stay consistent for the next 30 days and build lasting change?
17:44–19:34