The Rudest Rhymes Australians Say | Funniest Moments OF AUGUST
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What outrageous Australian rhymes kick off the episode?
Some people say two in the pink, one in the stink, but other people say it different. Two in the kitty, one in the shitty. Two in the snap out one in the crap
out. Number three
Shut the fuck up. I need a second. You need to go slower for my small brain, okay?
Two in the bush, one in the tush. Two in the cootie, one in the booty. And the number one way to describe the shocker. Yep. Two in the baby maker, one in the paddy cager.
I go to the door and I'm holding Pippa. And the guy's like dropping the stuff off and he goes, Hi, beautiful. Uh And I go. Huh! Well I know you're not talking to me. And no shit. He goes. No I'm not. Looks me up and down With the acidity of Ray Flux. And goes No, I'm not.
I'd like to send a shout out to Suckcliff Meats.
Oh, I love a butcher.
Now, Tony, for people that can't see this, I'm gonna ask you to just describe the butcher. Yeah. We're gonna see a video and it's like an Instagram competition. Oh my
god. I fucking you you fucking I know what it's about to
Come on, play the video, Charles. Okay guys, Luke here from Sucker Leaf Meats. This week's challenge. You can guess the weight of the lamb and myself, you'll get to take home the lamb. Uh can you describe how he's holding the lamb?
Um so this man is holding the whole thing. Um he's holding it over his shoulder, like the way that you would hold a big dog. But he's got his fingers up the arole of the lamp. It is so fucking funny. Like they they know what they're doing there, surely. Like if I had to carry a mate drunk out of a house party, that's how you'd hold it. Yeah,
but you wouldn't carry your drunk mate with your finger in his in his arsehole.
Well, if it was Charles, I mean, maybe if it was you, depends on who it was.
Some of my favourite comments, let's go. Um, you don't have to finger the fucking thing.
And apparently not true.
Not true. Um G'day Luke, do you mind not finger bashing me dinner? Thanks, man. Uh didn't you at least take it for dinner for a glass of wine?
Oh fuck, what an Australian comment section.
Uh do something you love and you'll never work a day in your life. Like that one really did mean that comment. Um, Steve, I just wanna be held like that.
And it's so fair, yeah.
New Zealander here. You're doing it wrong. Well, they would know. Um, and I don't think I included my own, but I've put a comment in that's popping off actually.
How do the hosts react to the weird pressure‑washing video game?
Did ya?
Yeah.
I almost commented, but then I saw someone had commented what I was gonna do, so I was like, What were you gonna say? I was gonna cause you win the entire, like the competition is that you win and I said I was gonna comment. Do you win the whole thing but H O L E?
Very funny. Yeah, but. Yeah,
but someone else was coming to that, I was like, I'm not gonna scam ya.
I wrote everything reminds me of her
That is really funny. Oh, and you've gone back for seconds because you've done a different other comment.
If I win can I get a fresh one? Well if I win the meat, I don't want the one that he's fucked in alright.
Yep. Yeah, oh but I've wish you'd committed to just one.
It's also an hour later.
Yeah, so you thought about it for that whole hour. No. And you were like, Oh, I wanna do a little bit better.
Five minutes later, but that hour's ticked over.
Nah, nah. That's not how it works.
I think it is. Um, strangely though, I don't think anyone entered the competition.
Oh, no one's actually guessing the weight. They're just having a fun time.
But does that mean that we could just lob an answer in and we'll probably get close to winning?
How much do you reckon it actually weighs? What's a what's a full lamb worth?
As him as well.
Oh him as well. Oh well you never guess a lady's weight, so I wouldn't do that. Do you remember when we had shits and gigs on the show and we talked about how they had that the someone wrote a s a a story about how for their their dog's birthday everybody guessed their work? And I was like, That sounds terrible. Let's see how she did this year. Oh, it's a long winter.
Up or down since last time.
Here's some iconic things that come in fives. The Olympic rings. The spas girls?
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Chapters
8 chapters
1
What outrageous Australian rhymes kick off the episode?
0:00–2:52
2
How do the hosts react to the weird pressure‑washing video game?
2:52–5:37
3
Why did the hosts discuss giving blood and the weird clinic experience?
5:37–8:41
4
What frustrations arise when verifying age on Substack?
8:41–11:18
5
How do the hosts tackle the rising crime‑rate and bin‑theft debate?
11:18–13:50
6
What’s the story behind the late‑night bin showdown?
13:50–16:30
7
How do the hosts wrap up with thoughts on community respect and safety?
16:30–19:20
8
What final jokes and sign‑offs close the August episode?
19:20–23:40