#374 - F*ngering During Backrooms
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What do Rachel and Mackenzie talk about when opening the episode and personal updates?
We are the greatest dykes in the world. Mackenzie Goodwin. Rachel Scanlon. Worldwide dykes for life. Hey! Two dykes, two dykes, two dykes. One mic, one mic, one mic, one mic. Yeah. Two dykes, two dykes. Who dykes, who dykes? We dykes, we dykes, we dykes.
Yeah.
Ladies and gentle-thumbs, welcome to another episode of Two Dykes and a Mic. I'm Mackenzie Goodwin.
And I'm Rachel Scanlan-Alee. I got my hair cut! You're welcome. However, it's a little too fresh, and I feel like I'm exposed. I think too much of my face. Mm-hmm. is seen that's okay it's a public episode i think there's something about having a little bit of my forehead out and the side of my face when i get a haircut i feel like my body is too big my head's too my hair is too small body big hair small yeah puss wet it's huge i think you look incredible i'm happy that we're here today i've missed you dearly i've missed you too you look
very good you look very good i want to talk about this outfit you're wearing if you're set if you're not watching the pod please fly in because rachel is wearing a i would say back rooms yellow yes back rooms yellow set louis vuitton yes i'm gonna be honest i'd i'd love if they had turned a corner and back rooms and you were just in the wall with a peg leg yeah 100 percent Eating couches. Eating couches.
Yeah.
Yeah. You can eat them.
Yeah.
That was fun. We'll talk about your set and then we have to talk about what happened when you and I went to see Backrooms.
Also, if you're listening to this podcast, you should be watching us on Patreon.
Yeah.
Is the real, real. You should be subscribed to us on YouTube or Spotify or Apple. And you should see the way that we look because some of us are out here trying pretty hard to get hot.
Well, okay.
Also me as well. I go like this.
Here's what I'll say.
And I'll say this.
I did Invisalign and it ended yesterday. I'd say Invisalign did you. Invisalign did do me. Big time. I was railed by Invisalign for about four to 15 weeks. May I say you were mad? I was.
Bye, Invisalign. Sorry, sorry. Is this public? I don't know if I can say mouth fucked.
Here's the thing. Here's the thing. I will say. That should be their tagline. We fuck your teeth.
We fuck your teeth. Hi, we're Invisalign. We'll rail that mouth. And they did for a long time.
And it hurt. Sorry. It hurt. It was wet and it lasted way too long. Yeah, it did. So I did get, anyways, they look great now.
Your teeth look so, I feel like, so after not seeing your teeth for so long and now seeing your teeth, I feel like they're raw. Like I'm newly sensitized to it. Like I've never seen a boob before and I'm like, whoa, my God. Like I'm in middle school and I'm looking at a human anatomy book and I'm seeing a vagina to myself. I shouldn't be looking at this. That's what I feel like.
Yeah. It feels intimate. Yeah. It feels very like they feel good. I want to touch your teeth. You can touch it later.
Thank you.
Can I actually. Well, let's talk about your set. And then I want to tell you what happened with my teeth.
With your tooth removal.
Yeah. Because something insane. I think. As always. I think something's up with my dentist. As always. I'm not going to say he was drunk, but I do think he might have been drunk.
As always. No dentist you can't trust. Yeah. A male dentist.
Yeah.
No.
I need my dentist to be women and South Asian.
Yeah. Sorry. And above 50.
Yeah. 100%.
I need them to be old. Yeah.
Woman.
Yeah. South Asian.
Or get out of my mouth.
Thank you.
Period. Thank you for talking about my set. I literally showed up to work today and thought to myself, Mackenzie's going to make fun of my outfit pretty hard.
And? And you loved it. I loved it immediately. I said, you look the best you've ever looked.
That's so crazy because you know I've got too much face right now. I love your face. Thank you for saying that. When they cut my hair, my hair had gotten so long that I actually had a full beard on the side and nobody told me. That's just a side note for you. I had a full beard. Billy Goat style. Yeah.
Like mutton chops. I thought you were going for that.
I wasn't. OK. I was at the county fair with my wife.
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Chapters
5 chapters
1
What do Rachel and Mackenzie talk about when opening the episode and personal updates?
0:03–4:44
2
How did Rachel describe her Invisalign removal and the chaotic dentist appointment?
4:44–10:51
3
What happened at the county fair, and why are fake Louis Vuitton finds discussed?
10:51–17:40
4
Why is the hosts’ fall tour 'Soaking Wet' important and what dates are announced?
17:40–51:49
5
How did an audiobook accidentally play explicit content during a Jiffy Lube visit?
51:49–59:17