Prison Didn't Break Me, Trying To Be A "Good Christian" Did | #081 | Unlearned Wisdom
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How did Jeff’s criminal past and religious anxiety shape his search for salvation?
So I got two felonies, assault with deadly weapon and an attempted robbery. Yeah, I had a high body count, really, really high. I was the only one blasted all over my face. Back in 2012, no one had face tattoos. Yes, I did start covering up my tattoos. I started wearing makeup. Although I was within the church, I was still lost. I would just be sitting down like me and you right now and then I would look and my heart rate will be like almost at 200. For no reason, bro. I'm not even a real Christian. Until I heard that video is when all that anxiety left, bro. My dad was like, I was preaching everything wrong.
This is a new segment where we bring people from the Koth community who I've helped personally, and they share their testimonies, and you guys can apply these testimonies or just lessons as we're chopping it up into your life. And today, we have a very special guest. His name is Jeff. My name Jeff. No, just kidding. He's a tattooed preacher. If you guys follow him on Instagram, some of you guys would know. But yeah, Jeff, man, welcome, bro. How are you feeling?
Thank you, man. Just honored to be here. Pastor Johnny, very grateful to be a part of the Koth community as well.
And
just to have everyone tuning in. Just like you said, my name's Jeff. You know, I'm just your guys' Mexican homie with the whitest name probably ever. If
you
guys know what movie that is, put it in the chat below
to the
comments to see if you guys know
where is that from, you know? When that movie came out, you probably heard that everywhere, huh? Oh, everyone
was just clowning on me on that. But, you know,
I was like,
it's cool because I never really liked my name before.
But,
you know, because I was like, man, Jeff. So I'll be like, call me Jefe.
Yeah, Jefe. Jefe is a dope name. Jefe, if you guys don't know, means like boss man, like leader. But yeah, bro. What was your what was your childhood like before your parents became pastors?
Honestly, bro, I would say my childhood was a little bit above average, man, because I had both parents in home. I didn't experience, you know, alcohol, drugs, even curse words at the house because I grew up in a Christian family.
How did growing up as a pastor’s kid lead to religious trauma and legalism?
Wow.
And, you know, but very typical Mexican household, though, because my parents immigrated over here, you know, so they had to cross through the borders and just trying to pursue that American dream. And, you know, they landed in L.A. And I was born in Huntington Park,
H.P. H.P., shout out H.P. Yes, sir. You say a typical Mexican household. Can you go for the viewers who aren't Hispanic, who aren't Mexican, who aren't Raza, as we say? Yes, sir. What was that like, bro?
Yeah, so pretty much because my dad, he crossed over, he left Michoacan, that's where he's from. My mom left Zacatecas, that's where she's from. They had to immigrate over here and kind of like connect with whoever they knew. So we will live like essentially with a bunch of people in the house crammed up. So even when my parents got married, You know, they met through the church. By that time, they were already following God and, you know, pursuing a Christian lifestyle. And so they were still, even though they were married, we were living with other relatives,
you know,
because I have family in Compton. our family, South Gate. So like around like Huntington Park area, you know, and so that's how I was, you know, very typical because you kind of like gang up together, you know, so we can be able to, you know, have a place to live, pay the bills. You know how it is, brother. How
many people
lived in that house? Man, so...
And how many bedrooms in that house?
Yeah, I think it was probably like a two-bedroom, and so it would be my parents, and then I'm the firstborn, so me, and then I know I had my uncle living there and his wife, so... You know, so it'll probably be like anywhere six of us
and then my
uncle's kids to my cousins.
So,
yeah. So anywhere from like six, eight people, you
know, two bedroom
in a two bedroom. Yeah.
Yeah. So we try to make it work, you know? Yeah. Yeah. So during that time, you know, being a pastor's kid, obviously you got eight people in the house.
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Chapters
8 chapters
1
How did Jeff’s criminal past and religious anxiety shape his search for salvation?
0:00–2:08
2
How did growing up as a pastor’s kid lead to religious trauma and legalism?
2:08–23:37
3
How did childhood trauma lead Jeff to seek belonging in gang life?
23:37–40:21
4
How did prison and a pastor’s visits begin Jeff’s journey back to faith?
40:21–1:13:48
5
How did Jeff find community and a new identity after leaving prison?
1:13:48–1:32:09
6
How did trying to fit into church culture affect Jeff’s marriage and mental health?
1:32:09–1:51:49
7
How did learning about salvation by grace bring Jeff freedom from anxiety?
1:51:49–2:16:25
8
How did faith help Jeff reconcile with his parents and mentor at-risk youth?
2:16:25–2:27:56
Speakers
2 identifiedMore from Unlearned Wisdom by Johnny Chang
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