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Wait Wait... Don't Tell Me!

We admire dimes and Aasif Mandvi gives breakup advice

21 Mar 2026

Transcription

Transcript generated automatically by AI and may contain errors.

Chapter 1: What is the main topic discussed in this episode?

0.031 - 25.06 Peter Sagal

These days, it feels like the news changes every hour. Well, NPR has a podcast that does that too. NPR News Now brings you a fresh five-minute episode every hour of the day with the latest, most important headlines in episodes that are clear, fact-based, and easy to digest. Listen to NPR News Now on the NPR app or wherever you get your podcasts.

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28.634 - 49.526 Unknown

From NPR and WBEZ Chicago, this is Wait, Wait, Don't Tell Me, the NPR News Quiz. I'm the voice so hot, the mic drops itself. I'm Bill Curtis, and here is your host at the Studebaker Theatre at the Fine Arts Building in Chicago, Illinois, Peter Sagal.

0

49.547 - 75.433 Bill Curtis

Thank you, Bill. Oh, thank you, everybody. Great to see you. Thank you so much. Later on today, we're going to be talking to former Daily Show correspondent Asif Manvi, who left that show in 2017 to star in TV shows and movies and plays in which he didn't have to talk at all about the news. The man has timing. So give us a call before we figure out a way out.

0

75.473 - 83.781 Bill Curtis

The number to call is 1-888-WAIT-WAIT. That's 1-888-924-8924. It's time to welcome our first listener contestant. Hi, you're on Wait, Wait, Don't Tell Me.

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84.262 - 88.907 Paula Poundstone

Hi, Peter. This is Grace, and I'm calling from Peacham, Vermont.

89.047 - 104.896 Bill Curtis

Peacham, Vermont. I'm going to say that if I wrote like a TV show set in a fictional but charming Vermont town, I'd probably call it Peacham. Is it what I imagine? Is it beautiful and verdant and filled with interesting people, Grace?

105.617 - 116.156 Paula Poundstone

You bet it is. It's a beautiful place. It's a hill town about an hour south of Quebec and 20 miles from the nearest Starbucks.

116.296 - 136.908 Bill Curtis

Whoa. Whoa. Well, Grace, let me introduce you to our panel this week. First up, it's the comedian you can see April 9th at Tulalip Casino in Seattle and April 27th through May 3rd at the Comedy Cellar at the Rio in Las Vegas. It's Alonzo Bowden. Hello, Grace. Oh, hello, Alonzo.

136.928 - 145.877 Bill Curtis

Next, she's a comedian you can see in Frederick, Maryland on April 17th at the Weinberg Center for the Arts and host of the podcast Nobody Listens to Paula Poundstone. It's Paula Poundstone.

Chapter 2: What new dimes are being introduced and why are they significant?

1402.714 - 1411.948 Aasif Mandvi

And lives in the dollhouse. But they hate each other, and they're constantly trying to kill each other. So it's Honey, I Shrunk the Kids meets Tom and Jerry.

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1411.928 - 1417.696 Bill Curtis

Did you have to spend any time on set, like, crouching down and pretending you're talking to a six-inch-high Elizabeth Banks?

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1418.096 - 1442.667 Aasif Mandvi

Yes. Later in the season, I do... Matthew hides the whole storyline of his wife from me for a long time until he finally can't, and then there is a moment where he and I are both on the floor talking to a small cardboard cutout of Elizabeth Banks. Right. And they would sort of move her around... Sort of pretend like she was walking.

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1442.747 - 1456.38 Bill Curtis

I have one more question for you. Like I said at the beginning, I first knew you and became a big fan when you were on The Daily Show. But I heard a story, I don't know how this could be true, that you ended up appearing on The Daily Show the same day you auditioned for it?

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1456.563 - 1465.802 Aasif Mandvi

Yeah. How is that even possible? That is true. A couple of days earlier, I had found out that my ex-girlfriend had gotten engaged. And so I was very upset.

1465.882 - 1465.962 Unknown

Yes.

1465.982 - 1477.626 Aasif Mandvi

And I was writing one of those letters. No. You know, that you write to your ex-girlfriend saying how you f***ed up. You know, and I can't say that. Can I say that? You just did. I just did. Sorry.

1477.606 - 1500.559 Aasif Mandvi

it's all right you'll figure it out anyway so i'm writing this and i get this call uh to come and audition for the daily show and i and i i was in such a bad place uh that i said i can't come in today i don't feel that can i come in tomorrow and they said no if you don't come in today then it's done so i literally just like put on a suit and i went in and um

1500.539 - 1522.598 Aasif Mandvi

I honestly just had this attitude of like, I'm never going to get this. This is ridiculous. I'm in the wrong frame of mind. And John met me, and he said... And I was a little bit surly, because he said to me, he said, have you ever performed in front of a live audience? And I remember looking at him and just being like, dude, I've been on Broadway. And...

Chapter 3: How did the new dimes spark controversy?

1533.34 - 1550.684 Aasif Mandvi

And I was on the show that night. And I didn't even get a chance to tell anybody. And suddenly it was just, I was on the show and people were calling me. We were like, there's a guy. He's on The Daily Show tonight. So I didn't even get to tell my family until after it was on.

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1550.944 - 1567.164 Bill Curtis

Did it comfort you, maybe, given the circumstances of the day, to know that maybe your ex-girlfriend would see you on this hit, incredibly culturally significant TV show and think to herself, my God, what have I done?

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1568.886 - 1577.461 Aasif Mandvi

You know, it's so funny. Like, The minute I got The Daily Show, I didn't really care about my ex-girlfriend that much.

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1577.481 - 1602.904 Bill Curtis

There you go. Lesson for you all. Thank you. Asif Manvi, it's a pleasure to talk to you. We have asked you here today to play a game we're calling... Miniature Wife Meet Miniature Groom. So your new series is The Miniature Wife, and we're going to ask you about a place you usually find miniature brides and grooms on top of wedding cakes.

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1603.966 - 1611.175 Bill Curtis

Answer two or three questions correctly, you'll win our prize for one of our listeners. The voice of their choice in their voicemail, Bill, who is Asif Manvi playing for?

1611.155 - 1616.271 Unknown

Linda Evers of Collinsville, Illinois. All right. Ready to play?

1617.112 - 1636.399 Bill Curtis

Sure. Here's your first question. Wedding cakes have been around since at least ancient Roman times, but the tradition back then was a little different. Instead of the bride and groom cutting the cake together, what would happen? A, the bride would throw the cake as far as she could and the groom would go find it and bring it back. B, they would break the cake over the bride's head.

1636.439 - 1661.916 Bill Curtis

Or C, they would put a live squirrel inside it and wait for it to eat its way out, thus cutting the cake. I'm going to go with B. Yes, you're right. They would break the cake over the bride's head. Oh, they lost a lot of good brides back then. All right, here's your next question. Wedding cakes, of course, are a tradition now.

1662.397 - 1679.032 Bill Curtis

But if you were getting married in 17th century Europe, you and your guests would most likely be cutting into what at the wedding celebration? Would it be, A, what was known as the bride's pie, a savory pie filled with oysters, lamb testicles, and occasionally live snakes?

Chapter 4: How do the panelists engage in the Bluff the Listener game?

2722.267 - 2743.21 Bill Curtis

This week, Florida lawmakers voted to keep it legal in that state for blanks to marry. First cousins. Yeah. According to new guidelines, experts suggest that people as young as 30 start taking drugs to lower blank. Blood pressure? No cholesterol on Sunday. Sinners and one battle after another with the big winners at the 2026 Blank Awards. Oscar. Right.

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2743.23 - 2766.904 Bill Curtis

This week, a passenger browsing the plush kangaroos at a Tasmanian airport was surprised to find blank. A real kangaroo? I don't know. Oh, so close. A real live possum. The passenger says he was delighted when he caught the possum cuddled up among the stuffed animals at the airport and that the staff was equally excited when they caught the wild animal and got him safely out of the airport.

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2766.924 - 2774.374 Bill Curtis

Meanwhile, the possum was like, damn, I'm never going to make my flight now. Bill, Shane did well. Did he do well enough to win?

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2774.875 - 2786.131 Unknown

Well, he got six right, 12 more points, and his 15 comes one short of Paula. Great showing.

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2786.151 - 2786.772 Alonzo Bowden

There you are, Paula. Good job.

2790.7 - 2808.041 Bill Curtis

Coming up, our panelists predict, now that his identity has been revealed, what will the artist Banksy do next? But first, let me tell you that Wait, Wait, Don't Tell Me is a production of NPR and WBEZ Chicago in association with Urgent Haircut Productions, Doug Berman, Benevolent Overlord, Philip Godica writes our limericks, our public address announcer is Paul Friedman.

2808.081 - 2827.61 Bill Curtis

Thanks to the staff and crew at the Studebaker Theatre, BJ Lederman, composed our theme. Our program is produced by Jennifer Mills, Miles Durmboss, and Lillian King. Special thanks to Blythe Roberson and Monica Hickey. If you say Peter Gwynn's name three times, he will appear. Peter Gwynn, Peter Gwynn, Peter Gwynn. Our vibe curator is Emma Choi. Technical direction is from Lorna White.

2827.63 - 2842.047 Bill Curtis

Our CFO is Colin Miller. Our production manager is Robert Newhouse. Our senior producer is Ian Chilog. And the executive producer of Wait, Wait, Don't Tell Me is Michael Danforth. Now panel, what will Banksy do next? Alonzo Bowden. Start a podcast. Why not?

2842.187 - 2846.905 Unknown

Shane Torres. He'll be the next Bachelorette. And Paula Poundstone.

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