Chapter 1: What is the main topic discussed in this episode?
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Watch what happens when there's so much that crappens. Watch what happens when there's so much that crappens.
Hello and welcome to Watch What Crap Is, a podcast about all that crap on Bravo that we just love to talk about. I'm Ben Mandelker, and joining me today is the hilarious and glorious and just beautifully stubbly Ronnie Karam. How are you?
Well, hello. How are you doing, Ben?
Look at that sexy afternoon shade. What's it called?
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Chapter 2: What shocking event occurs with Joe and V?
Five o'clock shadow. Five o'clock shadow. Yeah.
Okay.
welcome to your podcast ronnie we are here today to talk about below deck med what an episode um before we dive into that thanks to everyone who showed up to our various live things yesterday including the inimitable allison roman that was so cool that allison roman came and dropped by crappy hour our last one of the year. If you missed it, don't worry. It's, it's, it's here.
It's going to be, it's on our feet if it's not already and it's on YouTube. So go check it out. And in the new year, join us for future crappy hours. And then also join us on Patreon, patreon.com slash watch what crappens weekly bonus episodes, um, video discord community, all that great stuff. So thanks to everyone who supports us over there.
Thanks to everyone who comes to watch to the crappy hour. Thanks to anyone who just listens to the show to anyone who subscribes. What a great year we've had. And we're winding down, but that is basically that for that. What is going on with you, Ronnie? How are you feeling? What's new?
Good, good. Everything is good over here. Just getting ready for Christmas, doing a little shopping, et cetera. I'm in Texas. It's cold. It's wintry over here. It's like 45 degrees. It was 45 degrees today, so it was nice and chilly. It's good to wear a jacket.
Well, I missed you because this morning I also went on to Jeff Lewis's show on Sirius XM. So go listen to that if you missed that one. In your place was actress Elizabeth Rome. So, you know, she held down the fort even without my beautiful Rondella there. Well, that's fun.
How's she?
She's awesome. She's so cool. She's beautiful. Also, I was like, I was sitting next to her trying to be cool. I was like, but internally I was like, you're so pretty. but I tend to do that a lot with, um, with women or just ladies. Just like, wow. Yeah. Yeah. She is very beautiful. My gosh. Yeah, she is.
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Chapter 3: How does Kizzy react to her feelings for Joe?
I hate carbs. We hate carbs here, don't we, Shane? Shane will be like, yeah, we hate carbs.
Well, uh, they're always so nice over there. They, um, they offered to get me breakfast. So this time I said, no, I'll take an avocado toast and got this delicious avocado toast, but it was like covered in, in like chili crispens, like oil and all this stuff. I was so messy.
And like, and then like, if people come in, I'm like, I can't, I'm especially, I'm not going to touch Elizabeth Rome with my chili oil fingers, but I was a mess before the show started. And I was so embarrassed. That's funny.
Well, you had quite a morning. Avocado toast, croissant. Wow, it's like an orgy over there. It's just bedlam. Wow, it's like a...
I can't believe I've already gained back half the weight I lost with my no-carb October. How did that happen?
No wonder you showed up. Like, I think it might be time for a no-carb January or whatever.
Yeah, I need to. I mean, it's been pretty intense. It's been pretty carby. Well, that's good.
Well, today is Our Carbs Below Deck Med, Season 10, Episode 12, The Forbidden Kismet. Wow. What an episode. What an episode. It's nice to see that Joe comes from a hashtag boy mom because he 100% does. We got to meet Joe's mom today.
He's like, oh, darling, whatever you want to do, it's the woman's fault. Just do whatever you want. Did she trick you into it, darling? Did she? Did she trick you?
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Chapter 4: What drama unfolds during the charter guests' departure?
That was such a big deal because those two people were so together forever and everybody believed it. You know, I mean, Tom Sandoval was shocking because he was such a dope on the show. But I don't know. He was always kind of you were always kind of rooting for him because he was always against Jax and all.
You know, I mean, it's not like he didn't have any faults, but it was a shock that he did that. But this was not a shock. No, this was not a shock. I'll tell you who's going to be shocked. That girl's sinuses. V. She's going to be. Do you think you're sad now? Your grief is going to be tripled after this. Her sinuses are going to fall out of her nose.
We're going to need to go put straws in there for her because this guy's a total asshole. And yeah, fuck Kizzy, too. I mean, Kizzy, like we both knew we knew that both of these people, they're just trash and they're going to bring nothing but trash to whoever they're involved with.
And Kizzy got engaged to that dude that she's Tommy or whatever, whoever she's been calling all season and have fun, Tommy. Cause your life will be filled with trash now, you know, trash, garbage person, garbage.
Yeah. Uh, talk about a future divorce. What? She's like 23. I don't know how old Tommy is, but you guys will be divorced soon. So congrats on your future divorce. It's not even a wedding. It's a pre-divorce party that you'll be having. Yeah. And, um, you know, good luck to both of you all. Um, you're, you're interesting. Yeah.
I, the reason why I said it was like as close to blood I could ever get to Sandoval is that you have one girl who is like going through shit and her best, her quote, maybe not best friend, but her friend sort of quote unquote cheating with her Sandoval type. It's just as close to the show can really get to that kind of shit. Yeah. But I was so happy.
Honestly, I was, I really enjoyed the episode because I was very invested in this stupid situation and coming off of last season where I just did not give a shit about any of the romantic hijinks. It felt good to be annoyed, you know?
And it's also nice, like, you know, for a super judgmental person like me, when things come true, you know, like when you're, you know, that someone's a piece of shit and they're pretending they're not a piece of shit and then they turn out to be a piece of shit. And it's just, it's comforting to know that. Like, it's comforting to know. Like, there are pieces of shit that's not comforting.
But, you know, the fact that you still got it, you know? It's like, still got it. Not that this was a difficult case or anything. But, you know, people like Joe can fool people. Even like Asha, who's like, well, I don't know. I mean, it is Joe, but he does seem to have changed. No, he did not fucking change. And we even get the glorious... tears of them.
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Chapter 5: How does the crew handle the unexpected changes?
And then it turns out Jodie Foster's in a well. I'm like...
did it yeah i knew it and it's not like being a fan of buffalo bill or anything we're not cheering for that like yes you put somebody in a well yes give them the lotion bitch it's not that it's just like called it you know so yeah it feels good put in the work we put in the work to be able to to recognize these things and it's like nice when like to know that that work was not all in vain
yeah so we opened with kizzy on the deck with um with david oh god the the charter guest the david that she's gonna and you called this too because i really thought she was gonna go through with it and bang him but she didn't you were right last week you said she's just gonna chicken out and be like no no no no no and you were right so that's what she's doing he's like are you afraid you're afraid of getting in trouble right now oh for following your passions oh on the deck of this boat and she's like yeah he's like well i don't want to get you in trouble
Bad girl.
Well, the reason why I knew nothing was going to happen was because if they did kiss, they would have shown us that and then made that the cliffhanger. But if they don't kiss, then that means then that means nothing happened. Like they're going to do a cliffhanger trying to get you to think they might kiss.
But if they've got nothing to show there, if they got something to show, they'll show it and then make that the cliffhanger. So that was what I was going off of.
Well, you did it. Whatever you did, you did it right. So she's like, I feel like I would get fired. Please, please don't get me in trouble. And he's like, oh, I would never get you in trouble. And she's like, oh my God, you know, it's taken me close to, I had to get this close to kiss a charter guest to realize that maybe I've taken it a bit too far.
Oh, Aisha would flip his shit if I started snogging David on the deck.
I can't do it. I can't.
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Chapter 6: What are the implications of Joe's actions on his relationships?
Captain Sandy's out there filming. She's like, wow, so peaceful out here. God, it's great. It's like Norma's phone waiting for a man to call.
it's so peaceful it's like norma's phone it's on do not disturb except that naturally she doesn't have to turn the setting on it's just quiet no interruptions what i'm trying to say is no one calls her uh so uh now everybody gets up and starts working in the morning and nathan and joe are talking and joe's like oh kizzy smells good bro and he's like she smells good don't be stupid don't be stupid bro and he's like what have i done
Because everybody knows what you're going to do. So later when you're crying and saying, oh, I just got so drunk. No, you've been planning this. This was premeditated.
By the way, now is a great time. I know we talked about this on Crappy Hour, but as long as Nathan's showing up here in case you missed it, now's a good time to tell the audience that Nathan's actually complete garbage and racist. And if you don't know what that's about, go listen to Crappy Hour because it's really unsettling and it's really disappointing.
Yeah, Nathan, fuck that guy. So in the galley, Max is attacking Kathy with a hug. He's like, oh, kissing her cheek. And this week she's kind of softened to Max, which I was surprised by. I thought she was kind of grossed out by him. I thought she got the ick and she was just going to be done with him. But I guess she's giving it another go. Yeah. She finally got her chocolate.
So she really softened up. Yeah, she got the ick. She turned the page and it's a new kitty on a new month. And you know what? She found the strength to keep going.
Yeah. Yeah. So he's like, you know, bouncing all over her and she's like, it's too much energy. So then Sandy is like, okay, well, okay, Nathan, just so you know, it's really tight in here. So. Okay, Max, we're going to, we're going to park in a different parking spot. So Max is going to do something else. Okay, we need him to do puppetry. So I need him to do some hand, some shadow puppets.
Okay, and he's going to take his, he's got to pretend, he's got to show me how big he says his penis is. And then he's got to demonstrate how big it really is. So go wide and then go small with his palms. That's what I need him to do, big and then small.
And they cut to Max on the swim platform and he's just throwing towels up in the air like, oh, la la la. And she's like, okay, well, listen, this is America's Cup. And our original marina is full for the rest of the season. So we've got to go to the new one. But it's more challenging because it's real thin, right? You've got to try and get in there. So we're going to try it, you know.
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Chapter 7: How does Nathan's management style impact the crew?
You know, zoom, zoom.
Just like fucking crash down.
Why does he think he's getting a chance to be lead deckhand? Wasn't it already assigned? I don't know. Did they just like pull this interview from a different part of the season? So, so Max is like, he's like, okay, I'm on position and I'm at 2 a.m. And Nathan's like, oh my God, he's like, oh, that's guy 2 a.m. So Max is like, this is not about Joe. It's about Nathan not being fair.
Cause you work hard and you're like the best one. And then his best friend show up and just fuck me over. It's like corruption. Okay. In politics, this is corruption. I'm like, It's not that deep, bro. It's just a fake position on a show with fake deckhands.
If it's truly like politics, there's enough room for every idiot. So just keep yelling. You'll eventually get something. So Nathan is showing Max, you know, they're like, one meter, one meter. And she's like, I need to see your hands, Max.
He's like, what? I don't have anything in the hand.
She's like, no, I'm not accusing you of stealing anything. You need to tell me how many meters there are before we go into the thing, okay? I need to show, just show me your hands. And he just gives her the flash like for 20. Yeah.
yeah because the whole thing is that like he has to be like because of whatever he just has to do some sort of like hand thing and that's all he has to do so uh v is still um she still has to stuffy those so nathan's gonna talk to captain sandy about that and then the guests are talking about being up late and david's like yeah i got broken up with guys I have to recollect myself.
It's so tragic.
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Chapter 8: What happens during the flamenco event?
Everything's great. We're fine. Okay.
Okay. Good job, everyone. Good job.
Meanwhile, Max has just been acting like an idiot. He hasn't been doing anything right. And he's like, fuck, what do they want from me? And Ethan says, what the fuck are you doing, Max? Just because you're a lead deckhand doesn't mean you get to throw your fucking hands in the air and say, I'm not going to do my job. Go back to your own country.
You probably did say that, to be honest.
It's time for a commercial. It's time for a crappin's commercial.
Okay, all right. Well, we made it. We docked.
So we're all safe. Okay, so let's get back to you guys being stupid. So now it's Kizzy. Kizzy's walking by Joe and sticks something in his butt cheeks. And he's like, clenches it in his butt. And she's like... So, you know, sexual chemistry is off the charts. Nice finger in the butt action.
So she's like, well, that was a little harder than it needed to be. And yes, I am talking to you, Joe. Okay, I can see you in the cameras. But good job, everybody. So then Kathy asked Kizzy how the night was. And she's like, oh, my God. He was like, wait, are you breaking up with me? Can you believe it?
An American wanted to marry me. Okay.
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