Chapter 1: What humorous observations do the hosts make about being hungover?
Yeah, man. Hey, we're here. We might be drunk, folks. I might be hungover. Oh, good. Well, let's see. You're in the right place. I'm feeling it, dude. We can have a cocktail. Wow, look at that. Noir, Florida. You're a good photographer, buddy. Thanks, pal. Love the lights. Love the sold out. Great. Three shows in the Tampa Theater. Wow, look at that suit. Yeah, we had a good time, man.
Wow, that's a great shot. Yeah, he got some great shots. I would say I feel like I got it Thursday. So first show, we had three shows, two Friday, one Thursday. I was like, I got it Thursday. And then the early show Friday was even better. And I was like, oh, I'm not going to top that show. And I was right. The late show Friday was a little stiff. Not bad, but not at the level.
Early show, I was like... Oh, this is what I want on every joke. That's nice. Nice to get it early, too.
Chapter 2: What experiences do the hosts share about performing at shows?
Yes. Because I've had the one where you get it on the last show and you're like, thank God we got that one. I know. Yeah, I started definitely pounding a little more Bodega Cat in between those shows because I'm good. Yeah, yeah. Does that affect your performance if the crowd isn't giving you? Of course. Yeah. I mean, if you're fucking a girl and she's just laying there, it ain't great.
That's perfect. You'd almost rather the faking because at least then it gets your ego up. Although Cosby is probably the same either way because he's kind of a slow sit-on-a-stool type of guy. Oh, yeah. Either way, it's like I don't need any energy. I can handle this. Yeah, yeah. Yeah, man. No, I think – yeah, I need energy.
I need – I mean it's so – and yeah, I slow down when they're slow and then you just kind of get worse laughs I think. You can't really build momentum. Right. You make the mistake of then going too fast. Either way, it adapts. It's not good. Yeah. Now, what is this? Like your sixth hour? Something like that. I don't know. Do you have any taping nerves still?
Chapter 3: How do the hosts discuss the impact of audience energy on performance?
None, dude. That's nice. I do feel like with this one, I ran it so much leading into it that it got like – so I did Carnegie Hall in December, and I feel like it's – my friend saw it in Stanford like two weeks ago, and he was like, oh, it's like a different hour.
Whoa.
He's like, you cut so much fat. So you do like eight hours, nine hours a week on the road. Totally. And you keep running it, and you're like, oh, I – you keep believing in that one or two lines that aren't hitting. And you're like, I like that line. But then you're like, let me just try a different line once. And you replace it and it's better.
And you're like, fuck, I should have done that a month ago. Totally. You get married to dumb lines. I know. That you're like, that's a good line. And it's not. But you ever have that thing on Reddit where someone's like, they quote one of the lines and you're like, that's the one I liked that no one else liked. And you're like, that was for that one guy. I'll keep a couple. Okay, okay.
You can only have a couple. Once you do too many of those, you become a shitty comic. That's a good point, yeah. Because you're just like, yeah, this special's for me. Yeah, it's a fun, we did a little fun. Wow, look at that. You look 10 feet tall there. Yeah, I should have gotten those pants taken in one more time. I think it's a look. I like it. It's a look. A little baggy.
A little, like, what do you call it? Like old Hollywood suits. Yeah, exactly. And look at this. Hey! Oh, yeah, Swanson and Vitor. We end up having, like, a three-hour breakfast the morning of. I love a three-hour breakfast. Love it. I love when the vibes are so good no one wants to leave. Yes, yes. That's a real comedy thing. Like, I'll get in a green room. I never want to leave it. I know.
He wants us to do a comedy cruise. He's like, Let's do a comedy. It's the only sober guy I know that wants to go on a fucking boat. Right. And he was like, would you do it? And I'm like, honestly, no. And then he told me he has Jessel neck and he said I'd need Saudi money. Ah, that's a great line. Saudi on the seas. But I was like, dude, I hate I'm not a boat. You hate boats, right?
I've done two of them and I get stir crazy. Just staring at that little porthole looking at just vast ocean. Who the hell is this? The other crews, I did the Burt one and I just drank the whole time. That's how I got through it. Oh, God. It's brutal. And the hang helps. Well, they asked me to do Burt's. His manager was a lot.
And she was like demanding I give an answer a year out whether or not I do it. Yes. And I was puking. I had gone out with Julian Edelman the night before. It was like the last night of our podcast together. We got fucking blitzed. I remember this night. I was puking all day. And she goes, I need an answer today. And I was like, well, if it's today, it's no.
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Chapter 4: What are the hosts' thoughts on the Oscars and their nominees?
There you go, Peters. Timing. Comedy's all about timing. Yeah, turned it down. But remember in Dublin for that festival, me, you, Colin Quinn, Nate would all meet for breakfast. Chrissy D. Chrissy D. Rachel. We'd spend five hours at this diner. We ended up in this really nice museum. Oh.
And we were like the trashy Americans there where Chris DiStefano just lets out the loudest fart and everyone just stares at us and we all started laughing. Yeah. And we're like, wow, we do not belong in any sophisticated places. It stunk, too. I remember that fart, too. It was a bad fart. That was a crazy American... Turd. Oh, I just realized something.
I just heard your whole act for the first time in a long time this weekend. You have an Anne Frank bit. Yeah. And you have an Anne Frank bit. Well, she's a very popular comedy person. She's mentioned a lot. She paid her dues so that we could all talk about it. Yeah. Good writer, good writer. Game recognized game. Hell yeah. Love the diary. Big fan. And we've all lived in small apartments.
We were like, keep it down up there. Yeah, my Anne Frank bit took like eight months to perfect. It was such a weird bit. It took a while for me, too. It was a blessing that I didn't get let into the Anne Frank house in Amsterdam because being annoyed, I couldn't get in. I was like, oh, this is clearly a bit. Right, right. But yeah. How long is your bit? 30 seconds. It's just a quick two-liner.
Yeah. I mean, you got to have everything, man. You go over the whole hour. That's the crazy thing about taping is you're like, I want this part to pop. I want this part to pop. I have little lines that if they don't get a line, I kind of write off the crowd. Oh, yeah. They don't get a pop from just even a setup that I was like, that should hit.
And if it doesn't hit, I'm like, fuck, they're going to be dumb. I know. I have a lot of those, too. You want every line to hit. And they've hit before, so you're like, come on. They hit last time. You've got to hit this time. Oh, dude. Yeah. But were you here this weekend? No, I had a wacky one. I went to, I did Club Shea Shea in Vegas. I can tell you. It's crazy it's in Vegas.
Well, he used to be in LA, and it got too expensive, so he moved to Vegas.
Damn.
California's losing everybody, dude. They really are. Spielberg left. Zuckerberg. Yeah. I heard a baseball player was supposed to sign for San Diego Padres, and he was like, taxes are too high. I'm signing back in Arizona. Whoa. Like he turned down a whole state. I'd rather lose. Exactly. Whoa. I'd rather never win a World Series. Wow.
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Chapter 5: What are the different types of naps mentioned?
I'm a bottom. Power nap, then there's cat nap, and then there's kidnap. Oh.
Chapter 6: Is it still considered kidnapping if the victim is an adult?
So if an adult gets kidnapped, is it a kidnap? Like, what's her name?
Chapter 7: What are the pet peeves discussed in the episode?
It's kidnapped, but she's 88 years old. I think it's still a kidnapping. Savannah Guthrie. Yeah. It should be a napping. Did they find her yet? Nah, she's dead. Oh, shit. Is she officially dead? I'm calling right now.
Chapter 8: What are the latest movie projects mentioned by Simon Rex?
Usually. I'm calling. You don't have the authority to call this. Polly Mark, put me down for a dead Savannah Guthrie. This is too dark. Okay. He's going to want to scrub the episode. I got a couple of peeves. Wait, let me just say this off your suitcase. Bring it. I got one that'll rock your tits right off there, Rexy. Dress shoe. Imagine being a foreigner and you're like, dress shoe?
So I got to wear a shoe that goes with a dress? Is it a dress or a shoe? It's not dress up. There's dress shirt. It was dressed up. The Canadians call their chips with everything on it all dressed. It's dressed. Yeah, it's dress up. It's dress up. Yeah, I think so. But it's a dress. I want to go up a dress. It's a thing. And then so a dress shoe, it's like a bull shark. Which one is it?
I think it's all right. It's all right. OK. And then you order some shoes to your address. OK. Jesus, I got to get out of here. Just saying, if you're a foreigner, that would be confusing. Or how about this one? Pretty ugly. Oh. She's pretty ugly. Wait a minute. Wait, wait. Pretty ugly? Make up your mind here, Dickless. Yeah, it's like a Dodge Ram. Yeah. Dodge Ram. You're ramming it. Ah.
All right. Let me get Jerry on the line. Wait. Also, you know the term drag? You know what that comes from? Like drag. Like that shows drag queen or like you're a drag queen? Okay. So it's negative. This is a drag? Well, no, no. Drag queen comes from back in the old theater in England. The men would wear a dress that played women and it would drag on the ground.
And that's the origin of drag queen. And they wear the outfits. Ah. It's from the British. A lot of stuff comes from British origins. That's true. A lot of prison origins. I asked my wife if she wants a cigarette after sex. She said, no thanks. One drag is enough. That's a good Bill Cosby. My Cosby. Yeah. All right. Sorry. What was your thing? I got a few peeves. Okay. Hit me.
Well, one is people who get too annoyed by a fart. Oh, thank you. I appreciate it. Have you met these people? They're just like, oh. Oh, what? And you're like, all right, calm down. You didn't get shanked. He just looked annoyed. Yeah. I'm talking about the people who get like dramatic over it. You've seen it where they're like, oh, who farted?
You did it to Seinfeld and you took a shit on Sandler's tour. I know too much. Yeah, I shouldn't have done that. That was a rookie move. Yeah. That's it. That's a no-no. I'm out of the in crowd. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. But no, the people who get, and also the people that try to shame the farter. Yeah, it's like, come on. If it's a close group of friends, I'll give it to you. But the people...
Who farted? Yes, yes, yes. This isn't Knives Out, motherfucker. And it's going to end. The fart dissipates in a minute and a half. Get out of here. I can see if it lingered. It's like when people get mad. You haven't seen fill-in-the-blank movies. People get upset about the lack of movies. What's one movie you're embarrassed you haven't seen? Lion King. Not embarrassed, but people get upset.
And I'm not going to see it. Based on Hamlet. Speaking of farting.
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