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Your Mom's House with Christina P. and Tom Segura

Conspiracy Chaos w/ Sam Tripoli | Your Mom's House Ep. 792

08 Jan 2025

Transcription

Chapter 1: What interesting criminal story is shared at the start?

11.436 - 30.204 Tom Segura

What's everybody. It's another episode of your mom's house. She's Christine. I'm Tim. And we're excited to share so much with you today. Um, it's a really action packed episode. There's so much. It is now January of 25, which is such an unusual thing to say.

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30.686 - 32.547 Christina Pazsitzky

I know, I didn't think I'd be alive this long.

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33.068 - 34.949 Tom Segura

We should have had hoverboards in 2015.

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34.989 - 36.45 Christina Pazsitzky

Dude, everything's so disappointing.

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36.47 - 37.11 Tom Segura

Flying cars.

37.19 - 41.893 Christina Pazsitzky

When I was a little girl, I thought about the year 2000. Didn't it just blow your mind? And now you're like, oh, that's it?

41.913 - 42.213 Tom Segura

It's 2025?

Chapter 2: What tribute is paid to Hard Rock Nick?

42.934 - 43.714 Christina Pazsitzky

Is that all there is?

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43.974 - 46.156 Tom Segura

What the fuck? There's just electric cars?

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46.587 - 48.189 Christina Pazsitzky

Well, these are pretty cool.

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48.529 - 49.15 Tom Segura

Phones are cool.

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49.19 - 53.015 Christina Pazsitzky

The phones are, they crush. And then you can get a chip in your head and stuff. You want to do that?

53.035 - 53.816 Tom Segura

Yeah, I want to do that.

53.836 - 62.046 Christina Pazsitzky

What are you going to get it for? I don't know. Like, it'd be cool to turn on your car with just your brain thoughts. Yeah. Or the radio. Or like, not even the radio.

Chapter 3: What is Christina's latest creative work about?

62.066 - 82.962 Tom Segura

Remember I used to make fun of Cousin Brian? He was like, there should be a thing where if you're listening to something on the radio, you can just have your phone and then it would send you a message. And I used to be like, that's a fucking idiot. And then the first time I saw Shazam, I was like, that's his idea. He didn't know how to execute it, but all those things are coming.

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83.182 - 93.367 Christina Pazsitzky

He had smart thoughts. What do you want more than anything? What do you want? Yeah. I want a car, well, a car does drive itself, that Tesla. Definitely flying, flying for me. Flying car.

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93.607 - 99.61 Tom Segura

Flying stuff, anything flying, which you can, you can go fly something, but just so it's more accessible, easier.

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Chapter 4: What fan submissions are discussed regarding Charo?

99.95 - 103.471 Christina Pazsitzky

Oh, I know what I want, transport beams. Yeah. Like in Star Trek?

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103.591 - 107.813 Tom Segura

Yeah, I mean, that's essentially the highest version of flying.

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107.853 - 115.876 Christina Pazsitzky

That's all I want, is to be able to go somewhere, boom, like that, without getting on a plane. Yeah, you can get a helichopter. I don't want a helichopter, that's how cool.

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116.596 - 117.156 Tom Segura

Oh, stop.

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117.397 - 118.417 Christina Pazsitzky

That is how Kobe Ryan died.

118.457 - 118.877 Tom Segura

Not really.

118.897 - 119.658 Christina Pazsitzky

You didn't hear that?

120.058 - 130.404 Tom Segura

No, he's not gone. He's dead. No, I do. I know. But that was just, that was the arrogance of a pilot. You know? That really wasn't, it's not the helichopter's fault.

131.425 - 132.706 Christina Pazsitzky

I blame the helichopter.

Chapter 5: What conspiracies does Sam Tripoli discuss?

386.155 - 387.316 Dave

So he had pepper spray and a knife.

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387.356 - 394.598 Tom Segura

He's like, I was defending myself. And you guys are treating me like a black man. It's like, okay. So today I'm going to be a black man.

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395.338 - 400.38 Christina Pazsitzky

I do have to say that the marker is very distracting from anything else he has to say.

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400.72 - 422.275 Tom Segura

yeah it's a whole thing man well how did the judge react uh i mean the judge has to be like no you're totally you belong here for for double life what is you're out of your mind the judge doesn't really have anything here on the judge um that's terrible yeah i don't know yeah oh here's the judge

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422.728 - 424.309 Random Clip

Y'all finished or y'all done?

Chapter 6: How does mass surveillance affect our lives?

Chapter 7: What crazy Japanese game shows are mentioned?

49.19 - 53.015 Christina Pazsitzky

The phones are, they crush. And then you can get a chip in your head and stuff. You want to do that?

0

53.035 - 53.816 Tom Segura

Yeah, I want to do that.

0

53.836 - 62.046 Christina Pazsitzky

What are you going to get it for? I don't know. Like, it'd be cool to turn on your car with just your brain thoughts. Yeah. Or the radio. Or like, not even the radio.

0

62.066 - 82.962 Tom Segura

Remember I used to make fun of Cousin Brian? He was like, there should be a thing where if you're listening to something on the radio, you can just have your phone and then it would send you a message. And I used to be like, that's a fucking idiot. And then the first time I saw Shazam, I was like, that's his idea. He didn't know how to execute it, but all those things are coming.

0

83.182 - 93.367 Christina Pazsitzky

He had smart thoughts. What do you want more than anything? What do you want? Yeah. I want a car, well, a car does drive itself, that Tesla. Definitely flying, flying for me. Flying car.

93.607 - 99.61 Tom Segura

Flying stuff, anything flying, which you can, you can go fly something, but just so it's more accessible, easier.

99.95 - 103.471 Christina Pazsitzky

Oh, I know what I want, transport beams. Yeah. Like in Star Trek?

103.591 - 107.813 Tom Segura

Yeah, I mean, that's essentially the highest version of flying.

107.853 - 115.876 Christina Pazsitzky

That's all I want, is to be able to go somewhere, boom, like that, without getting on a plane. Yeah, you can get a helichopter. I don't want a helichopter, that's how cool.

Chapter 8: What funny moments happen at drive-thrus?

187.298 - 194.439 Famous Chef

Oh, wow. It's pretty awesome. Jeez, it's heavy. That was heavy.

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194.479 - 198.241 Judge

Mom Segura. Titsitski. Yeah, yeah, yeah.

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221.782 - 224.942 Sam Tripoli

So today I'm going to be a black man.

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224.982 - 225.743 Tom Segura

This guy.

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249.73 - 277.047 Tom Segura

He is wielded in the court for those of you listening. He appears to be an Asian man or of Asian descent, maybe Hawaiian. He certainly has the accent. And the reason I say appears to be is because he's wearing shoe polish level like darkness on his face. He covered himself so darkly that you can't even tell what his features are. Tuesday, he is a Hawaiian man, it says here in the article.

277.807 - 293.134 Tom Segura

He showed up in blackface to be sentenced for attempted murder. The man said he did so because the court was treating him like a black man. Mark Char of Oahu was sentenced to life in prison with the possibility of parole on Monday for second-degree attempted murder, plus six years to be served concurrently on convictions.

293.994 - 306.287 Tom Segura

Of second and third degree assault, the charges stem from a 2016 road rage attack. Char appeared in the first court in Honolulu on Monday with his head completely covered with what appeared to be permanent black marker ink.

307.488 - 309.67 Christina Pazsitzky

Oh, that took a long time to do.

309.711 - 310.391 Tom Segura

Yeah, he liked that.

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