Alain De Botton
speaker
1,037 appearances
5 recordings
5 series
first heard Jan 2024
last heard 1 Jul
Alain De Botton’s voice in public audio — every appearance, attributed to the second.
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recordings per month · last 12 monthsRecordings per month over the last 12 months — 4 in all, peaking in Jul 2026 with 1.
Appearances
Because by the time somebody's really wounded us and then they start to explain, oh, but, you know, it's because my mother, when I was three, I was damaged.
You're not going to listen because, like, you've ruined my life.
I don't care about, you know, where this comes from.
But if you can do it early on, you can explain yourself.
You can say, look, I'm a little damaged in this area, or when I get sad, this happens, or when I get anxious, I have a tendency to do X, Y, and Z. If you can explain it, you're halfway there.
That's such a wise thing.
And, you know, I was thinking about sulking, you know, because there's some sulking going on in the novel.
Oh, yes.
Sulking is a... We're talking about romanticism.
Romanticism is responsible for an epidemic of sulking.
Because if you think of what romanticism... Romanticism tells us that a good lover understands you wordlessly.
You know, there's so many romantic scenes where two lovers seem to complete one another without language.
It's like...
Someone says something like, you know, do you know how it feels in the autumn when you're walking in the mist?
And the other one goes, yes, I know exactly.
You don't need to explain any further.
I'm there with you.
And so that sets us up to believe that a true lover just understands you and you don't need to kind of use words.
Now, this is catastrophic because it leads to moments when your partner doesn't understand.
Indeed, they cause you offence.
Showing 361–380 of 1,037 · page 19 of 52
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