Alain De Botton

And really what it means is you have given me permission to enter your life.

That's really what it is, because normally the mouth is so private.

You don't go anywhere near anyone else's mouth unless you're given permission.

And I think the thrilling thing, which we sometimes call sexual excitement, but

Sexual excitement is really psychological excitement.

It's like somebody has, in this lonely world, allowed me to enter their life.

And that is a thrilling prospect.

And I think a lot of things that we call, you know, blithely sexy are really exciting because they're an end to loneliness.

They symbolize an end to loneliness, a sense that somebody has accepted us.

That's the exciting thing.

And, you know, if somebody said, you know, if you, I don't know, touch, you know, my index finger in a certain way and that will be the token that I accept you, then that would become extremely thrilling and we all be sort of touching our index fingers.

So it's not the physical is the conduit of a certain kind of psychological acceptance, which is the really thrilling bit, I think.

Yes.

And then, of course, the tragic thing is that after a while, this person that you thought you would die if you didn't see, you know, is lying beside you naked.

You're both watching television.

Their body is no longer anything.

They're just, you know, just a presence there.

And you think, what's going on?

We are terribly spoiled.

And I think the great question is, how do we recover appreciation over time?