Bob the Drag Queen

I want to walk my wrestlers to the stage. I want to shit talk for them. I want to big up them. I want them to throw someone out of the ring, and I want to get a cheap shot in, throw in a little uppercut. You can body slam me. I can take a hit. Body slam me on something, honey.

You can come to one of my games. I'm so gay. Will you come to my play rehearsal?

You can come to one of my games. I'm so gay. Will you come to my play rehearsal?

Yeah, my audition. If I get it, I really want you at one of the matches.

Yeah, my audition. If I get it, I really want you at one of the matches.

I've only been to one wrestling match in real life. I went to Macon, Georgia. And I remember Kevin Nash standing near me. And Rikishi was there. Rikishi was there. And I remember thinking, I remember Kevin Nash kind of like walked near me. And I was looking vertically. And I'm thinking to myself, like, this might be the largest man I've ever seen in my life. And I saw Hulk Hogan. Boo.

I've only been to one wrestling match in real life. I went to Macon, Georgia. And I remember Kevin Nash standing near me. And Rikishi was there. Rikishi was there. And I remember thinking, I remember Kevin Nash kind of like walked near me. And I was looking vertically. And I'm thinking to myself, like, this might be the largest man I've ever seen in my life. And I saw Hulk Hogan. Boo.

I saw Hulk Hogan in a, boo.

I saw Hulk Hogan in a, boo.

I can't say his name without saying that. In a Delta Sky Lounge once. These men have ruined their bodies. He's crooked. He's built like a fucking, he's drawn like a Tim Burton character. He's like sliding, leaning over. He's got like a very, I could have whooped his fucking ass. Right there by the fucking pita chips.

I can't say his name without saying that. In a Delta Sky Lounge once. These men have ruined their bodies. He's crooked. He's built like a fucking, he's drawn like a Tim Burton character. He's like sliding, leaning over. He's got like a very, I could have whooped his fucking ass. Right there by the fucking pita chips.

And I should have.

And I should have.

Let's just go and watch. Don't tip me. I want to go.

Let's just go and watch. Don't tip me. I want to go.

They're probably doing the Kia Forum or something.

They're probably doing the Kia Forum or something.

But I haven't watched wrestling in so long that I don't know who's- All the new people. Yeah.

But I haven't watched wrestling in so long that I don't know who's- All the new people. Yeah.

I'm going to be cheering when Undertaker comes out. I'm going to be the old man like, Undertaker, tombstone!