Dr. Sarah Ashton

speaker

309 appearances 3 recordings 1 series first heard Dec 2020 last heard Oct 2021

Dr. Sarah Ashton’s voice in public audio — every appearance, attributed to the second.

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The Hook Up · I think I have a kink, now what? · 7 Dec 2020 podcast

And what's missing from from what people are seeing is all the

the safety, the discussion of consent, the psychological experience for both people that's going on underneath, which is entirely different and it and it might involve empowerment and safety and pleasure, and that this is what's achieved through engaging in this this kink.

So really it actually just comes down to not really understanding what's involved.

This is actually a really common kink.

Um, and and actually a lot of people experience distress because they um they they might feel the you know ashamed or or they might have their own self-judgment attached to to this experience or something that they find arousal.

I think I just want to sort of say up front that, you know, um I was reading some some really important research recently.

That and they found that there was actually no difference between the general population and the um like a sample of BDSM community and the level of trauma that they had experienced in their life, right?

So I think it's really, you know, part of just to kind of myth bust a little bit, there doesn't necessarily have to be an association between um trauma and kink, you know, or a higher level of of trauma within the kink community.

And just in terms of, okay, so.

Um, let's break down what actually might be going on here in terms of

you know if if you're someone who who knows that you're actually like you have a particular trauma and now you've got a kink that's connected with this trauma for sure.

Well like I was saying before the the experience of of engaging in kink practice um is could actually be really um

uh a form of of of healing and a and a way of working through this this trauma that has happened for you.

So if we think about the sorts of things which might be involved in

um in a sexual trauma.

So there might be fear, there might be violation of boundaries, there might be all sorts of internal and external sensory associations that that bring about this experience of trauma.

Essentially what you're doing in your brain when you engage in a

an a a scene that in enacts the same sort of scenario is that you're giving your brain the opportunity to reassociate different experiences with this.

So um you with the same sort of scenario, so with the same trauma, you might then associate safety, you might associate autonomy, you get to associate can control over the experience and you might even associate pleasure.

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