Elizabeth Shaw
speaker
1,154 appearances
11 recordings
1 series
first heard Nov 2016
last heard Sep 2021
Elizabeth Shaw’s voice in public audio — every appearance, attributed to the second.
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Appearances
They might be the people much more comfortable with having time apart from their partner.
when they're dating they might say seeing you twice a week's plenty for me and the anxious person saying, well I need to see you every day and talk on the phone three times a day.
So that's where these styles come into a clash.
You're listening
Well, um your style uh the original theory really said that um once once it was set in childhood, it was set for life.
Um and and that this was something to be managed.
It could be softened over time.
And it probably is true that it can be a predominant style.
Um, but there are things that can influence it.
So what you might notice is that um that if you're if you're with a partner and you've had feedback that
you're a bit clingy or a bit dependent or your need for reassurance like, well I texted you ten minutes ago and why haven't you replied yet, that kind of stuff.
If you find that others
see you as a bit over the top and you'll pick that up through friends and and partners who find that too much.
Um, you might start to note that in fact and if you if you're aware that you're hanging on the phone or you're worried about things or you've had a lovely date but then you spend the next three days worrying that it didn't work out.
then you know that your anxiety is very high and that if you're gonna bring that into a relationship it could feel quite
um suffocating and imposing.
Um the the thing is that uh because you might choose someone who has a different style, so say an anxious person meets an avoidant person
The avoidant person can really trigger the anxious person.
And so and also the anxious person can look worse because the avoidant person just throws them into contrast.
So it's like a push pull.
Showing 361–380 of 1,154 · page 19 of 58
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