Elliot Higgins

And so now Mother Earth is rushing up to caress me in her womanly bosom.

And I have... I mean, my balls are killing me.

And I am not going... I've abandoned all training.

I'm flying the chute, and I just plant this baby.

And so instead of a five-point landing tuck and roll, I did feet, knees, helmet.

And...

I mean, I had my bell rung so badly, I was seeing stars and I'm struggling to get up and I'm trying to manage my chute and get out of my, and I deployed my federally packed reserve chute.

That is such a no-no.

And the leprechaun comes roaring up and goes, well, Captain Airborne, it looks like you don't get an A. You're gonna have to jump two more times to get that A.

So I did and I barely got into dental school.