Joey Diaz
speaker
3,386 appearances
6 recordings
3 series
first heard Jan 2024
last heard 10 Jun
Joey Diaz’s voice in public audio — every appearance, attributed to the second.
Trend
recordings per month · last 12 monthsRecordings per month over the last 12 months — 1 in all, peaking in Jun 2026 with 1.
Appearances
God damn it. You just ruined everything. God damn it.
That's why you gotta love the 80s. Animals. That's why you gotta love the 80s, because two guys actually went into the studio and go, look, we got a movie about a fucking guy who falls in love with a mermaid. And the guy's like, come on, how are you going to do that? And all of a sudden it's fucked. Let me tell you something, that's another good movie.
Did you see that fucking prison where they took him, Nicaragua, whatever that place? It's in El Salvador. El Salvador, where they house him, 40 in the cell. That's crazy. That's fucking insanity. It's crazy. That's insanity, brother.
They took a handful of people that had weird tattoos and stuff like that. That's what I've heard, but I don't really know the truth. No, you don't know the truth.
Where's his police record?
Let me see his police record. If the guy has a tattoo and he's got no police record and he's got a family and a wife and blah, blah. It's like, remember when we used to take me for chicken? Which place? By your old house. 20 years ago, you used to always invite me for chicken. Oh, chicks.
No credit cards. Yeah, no credit cards. That's what killed him. So think about this. What if he had that for 20 years? Great guy, because I always went up there with you, and he was very nice to us. Yes, great guy. What if they came and got him because he didn't have a green card? Uh, he was a legal citizen. No, no, no. But he was legal? He was legal. He was legal.
Okay.
Before I send them back- Actually, I think he was more than second generation. Yeah, I want to make sure that this guy had roots in the community.
But it's not over a fucking tattoo. No. It's due process.
That's crazy. Yeah. I can't throw somebody back in a fucking prison like that. just because of a tattoo. I got to see something. I got to see something. He did something to disrupt the system.
Now, in 85, I lived in San Francisco, and I teamed up with a bunch of Cubans that came in 79. The Mario boat lived. And, you know, you went over there every day, and I had to buy the old guy, the guy that ran the corner, I had to buy him a little bottle of rum, a half pint, and he would let you operate your game, whatever your game was, selling weed, whatever.
But my point of the story is that I remember this specifically. From the time I got there to the time I left, there was probably 80 Cubans on the block. Maybe 20 of them got arrested. In those days, you got arrested. You got deported the following week. If you got arrested. They put you in jail. If you didn't have paperwork or you came in that Cuban thing, they would take you, right?
Immigration would come get you within 72 fucking hours and you'd be right back in Cuba and Fidel would shoot you.
I was worried when they came to Jersey. I didn't go out that week. I didn't do much. I'm a Diaz.
Yeah. Yeah. Take me back.
That's crazy. And on this hall, this ice hall, listen, you're picking up I don't know how many thousands of people, correct? How many people did they pick up on this hall? I do not know. I do not know. Dog, you're going to have a couple clerical errors. Listen, even the computer will pick them. You know, it's just a clerical error.
But there's also – Just be big enough to say we made a clerical error. Don't keep saying that I know you're a gang member because you got a fucking tattoo on.
He was such a fucking— Hi, Los Angelinos.
Due process has been my problem since all this shit started. And it started with even the cancer culture. Okay, due process. You got to come at me and let me know everything. Just because you opened up your mouth. I said that 22 years ago at a party. I kissed you. I tried to kiss you. That ain't good enough. That just ain't good enough. Well, I went home and called my girlfriend Diane.
Showing 261–280 of 3,386 · page 14 of 170
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