Julia Carpenter

speaker

3,850 appearances 71 recordings 1 series first heard Oct 2019 last heard Sep 2024

Julia Carpenter’s voice in public audio — every appearance, attributed to the second.

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WSJ Your Money Briefing · The Money Date: Couples Making Financial Plans Over Candlelit Dinners · 14 Sep 2023 podcast

You can look and just see, OK, is there anything wrong here? matched

Is there any fraud? matched

Oh, OK, we have this. matched

We spend money on this. matched

Oh, we don't want to spend money on this. matched

Just as a way to sort of crack the door open. matched

That's what you don't want it to be. matched

You don't want it to be a blame game. matched

You don't want it to be something that one partner feels like they're in the quote unquote right and the other partner is in the wrong. matched

You want it to be just a way for you both to get on the same page and a way for you to both plan for the future. matched

The end goal is to build more intimacy around money, to feel like you understand your partner's attitudes toward money, their goals, how they spend, how they save, and that they understand yours. matched

That minimizes conflict over the long term. matched

And when something then comes up during the week or during the month and you think, oh, okay, I really want to talk about how we're spending money on this, or I really want to talk about how far away we are from this, you don't have a fight in the moment. matched

You instead think, okay, I'll save it and bring it up on the money date. matched

Exactly. matched

Well, and also intimacy in that you understand the other person, you know, true intimacy in the sense that you don't feel like there's any secrets or there's any hiding. matched

Yeah, I mean, there's behavioral science that backs this up. matched

There is a concept called temptation bundling that behavioral economists have researched and studied that shows if you package a less exciting task with a more exciting reward, so a less exciting task like going over the credit card statement and a more exciting reward like spending one-on-one time with the person that you love, you're likelier to do it. matched

You're likelier to stick to it and make it part of your regular routine. matched

So it depends on the couple. matched

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