Kristin Neff

speaker

376 appearances 1 recordings 1 series first heard Oct 2020 last heard Oct 2020

Kristin Neff’s voice in public audio — every appearance, attributed to the second.

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Full-Tilt Parenting: Strategies, Insights, and Connection for Parents Raising Neurodivergent Children · TPP 231: Author & Self-Compassion Researcher Dr. Kristin Neff on the Power of Being Kind to Yourself · 19 Oct 2020 podcast

So we need that perspective, we need that space.

Um, we need to be aware of our pain, but not lost in it.

And so um that gives us presence.

Um, and then again, we need to react with kindness as opposed to harsh judgment, you know, saying, well, it's because you aren't a good enough parent, or you know, some people like I know a lot of um parents feel like some irrational shame.

You know, is it is it that, you know, glass of wine I had in my second trimester, or is it you know something to do with my genes, or is it something I did?

There's like an irrational shame or guilt about having um a special needs kid.

And so it's it's really about.

Remembering that you aren't alone, um, you not not judging yourself.

Uh so that that's the the kindness piece.

And then we could remembering that we're connected to others.

And when you put these three together, when you put mindfulness, kindness, and common humanity together, it feels like loving connected presence.

And so w what what it feels like when we h when I say hold our pain with compassion, it means using loving, connected presence, meaning present with what is, remembering that we aren't alone and being kind to ourselves.

Something as simple as thinking, well, what would I say to a a dear friend that I really cared for who was going through the same situation I'm going through?

And then saying that to yourself.

And it makes a radical difference um in your ability to hold what is.

Um but again remember that's only half the story.

Then you also may need to make a change.

Maybe you need to protect yourself.

You know, maybe your maybe your school district isn't doing enough for your child.

You need to go in and fight for the services they need, you know, or or you need to, you know, maybe you're you're doing some sort of herenting behavior that's making things worse.

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