Matteo Lane
speaker
178 appearances
1 recordings
1 series
first heard Apr 2025
last heard Apr 2025
Matteo Lane’s voice in public audio — every appearance, attributed to the second.
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Appearances
That's the whole point.
But it's under the guise of here's my health lifestyle. Meanwhile, they're just the hottest thing you've ever seen. And you're like, I know you're like putting your face in like an ice bucket, but I'm just looking at your ass.
I've always like, if I'll put like a thirst trap, I'm like, oh, I feel really good about myself. Then I'm like, oh, you lose followers. I'm like, okay, maybe I'll stop. I know. But I still do. I'm like, whatever. I'm only going to look like this for a while.
Why are you thinking about death so much?
Right. But how often? I mean, I feel like because it's in your like persona, this like party guy, this now I've turned into Barbara Walters because it's your persona. I want to know how much are you drinking? You know, but like on a daily basis, like are you drinking every day? No, I didn't drink yesterday.
I somehow drinking has left my life. Like when I was in my early twenties and I was living in Chicago, like I would, you know, go out on the weekends and we would drink, but you're also in your twenties and it's just experiencing something new. But then once I started doing standup, I just, I had somehow just kind of left every blue moon. I'll have like a margarita, but then I don't know.
I, I've gotten to this point now where I'm like, I drink and I immediately want to go to bed. Oh, I'm like, I just want to go to bed. So then I'm like, oh, I don't really think it's as... Like, my only advice right now is I bought a vape for this week. I'll probably stop next week.
I feel too disassociated. I know I'm so boring. I've never done... I've done Molly once, and I didn't feel, like, euphoric. I wasn't like, ah, fail it. Like, you know, I just was kind of, like, grinding my teeth. So I don't know that I loved that either. I don't know that I'm a big, like... um, party. I'm not a party, but I don't go to parties and stuff. I'm kind of a homebody.
Like I tour and then I come home and I don't know.
Yeah.
So my first joke was I remember I was in the basement of the creek in the cave. I told it this weekend. Yeah.
Every blue moon I catch myself, like something flies out from like 2008. I'm like, ah, still a hit. Still works?
Yeah, yeah.
It's still a hit. Why not? I'm taking a swing. But yeah, my opening joke, I remember, you know, no one knew who I was. And so I finally got called up in the first group at the open mic. It was the Friday night mic at the Creek in the Cave at six o'clock. And it was like, that was the mic. Like if you, and everybody was there, Michelle Wolf and everybody. And if you got called first, it was like,
okay like you know I'm kind of making it but for whatever reason I was called first and I went up and you know comics if you're new they kind of ignore you and so I went up and I did what I would do is I walk up I would say nothing and then I would sing in my falsetto and I would go oh mio bambino caro mi piace veloce And people were like, what?
And then I go, that's a true story of how I came out to my dad. And it was the first laugh I got. And then it was like then people started like, oh, you're that opera. Like it gave you some kind of identity.
Yeah.
And then it kind of gives you the confidence to keep going through those those mics. So you do six octaves. I mean, my whistle tones of like I've really lost my whistle.
Oh, okay. So, so like, yeah. So tell, explain this. So an octave is basically a piano has like about seven and a half octaves, meaning. So like it's, it's the, the right. So C D E F G. Oh yeah. So this would be... How old are you in this? I'm 24, 23. You can hear it. Ready? Oh, sorry. So this is where my range... I can still go really high, but not this high. You'll hear.
And he has an amazing singing voice. I could go really high. You'll hear it again. Yeah. Go from Liza to Mariah to Brittany. Um... Again... My life is better now. And pizzazz. Because... Yeah, it used to go so high.
Showing 81–100 of 178 · page 5 of 9
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