Nicole LePera, Ph.D.
speaker
380 appearances
1 recordings
1 series
first heard Mar 2026
last heard 29 Mar
Nicole LePera, Ph.D.’s voice in public audio — every appearance, attributed to the second.
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recordings per month · last 12 monthsRecordings per month over the last 12 months — 1 in all, peaking in Mar 2026 with 1.
Appearances
We now know that's not the case.
So we've begun to talk about emotions and emotional attunement and the need children have to be soothed and how important emotions are.
And I think to some extent, right, there can be and I talk about this in my book, almost an overcorrection where there perhaps aren't limitations or resilience, where we have more like a helicopter parent experience.
where a parent is maybe for a very well-intentioned reason because they themselves had a painful childhood.
So they're going to be so attuned, they might overstep emotional boundaries, want to become their child's best friend and share with them mature content that is well beyond their developmental years.
So I think naturally, and I think we see this in our own healing journeys as well, we discover something doesn't work, we overcorrect to another extreme and it takes a bit of time for us
Kind of a falling into a middle that's more workable.
And I think that same kind of pattern exists more globally with parenting in general.
there could be some kind of talk of what are the concerns, which I have many, of not having limitations or not having boundaries between, again, information that's too emotionally overwhelming for a child that can't understand developmentally what is happening.
So yeah, I think an overcorrection can often end up with behaviors and habits that aren't boundaried, aren't maybe developmentally appropriate, and then have their own kind of set of consequences for the child.
I believe safety is really the foundation of any kind of grounded, healthy individual, let alone any individual who wants to create change.
Because a body or a nervous system that doesn't feel safe isn't going to be able to be grounded, responsive, at ease in a body, right?
Not able to shift from reaction to response.
So without safety, I don't think that any kind of connection, healing response,
or change, which is what many of us are kind of wanting to do when we discover things that aren't working, is available or is possible.
And to be clear, though, safety doesn't always mean creating or manufacturing an unrealistic world where things aren't difficult or hard or can feel unsafe in any given moment.
The question is more so, can I make my way back
And of course, in childhood, right, that means if there's a moment of conflict or disconnection, I mean, to speak to your very wise point, Jason, humans are imperfect.
The goal isn't to avoid uncomfortable emotions or even moments of conflict or disconnection, even with your children.
more so the impact happens with what happens next, right?
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