Ronny Chieng

Anybody else have a claim from January 6th?

OK, three years of house arrest with eight kids and eight grandkids.

I don't care what you did.

That's cruel and unusual punishment.

I mean, look at her.

Look at this sweet lady.

Look at she's like rolling some dough.

What was her crime?

Did she bring unauthorized muffins into the Capitol?

I want to hear her side.

Yes.

When I see this woman trying to break into the Capitol with a battering ram like an orc in The Law of the Rings...

I think that's someone who deserves a payout.

She was just in the wrong place at the wrong time, with the wrong battering ram, breaking the wrong window.

It could happen to any of us.

And I like how she's trying to pretend the window she broke was just some random window.

Like you're removing some pretty important contacts, ma'am.

It's like John Wilkes Booth saying, oh, so what, I'm getting a firing squad just because I interrupted a play?

America is cooked, man.

Is there any voice of reason who will call out how wrong this is?