Why Ice Cube Stays Mad in Every Movie w/ Funny Marco | 2 Bears, 1 Cave

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2 Bears, 1 Cave with Tom Segura & Bert Kreischer 1h 40m 4 speakers 7 chapters transcribed 2 hours ago
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What tour dates and locations does Bert announce at the beginning?

Unknown 0:00
Hey everybody! This Sunday, October 19th, I'll be in Hanover, Maryland, at the Hall at Live during my Come Together tour. The next week I'm coming all across Indiana. Gary on October 23rd. West Lafayette on October 24th. Fort Wayne on October 25th and Bloomington October 26th. Get your tickets right now at TomScrew.com slash tour.
Bert Kreischer 0:23
Hundred percent.
Unknown 0:28
Thirty two? Yeah, I'm thirty two. How do you think I am? Uh, if I had to put a silent age on it, uh You're talking about solid or like not for what I guess was solid. If I was getting paid
Bert Kreischer 0:43
If I was getting paid. Who do you think is old you do you know Tom Sagura? Uh-huh. Who do you think is older, me or Tom?
Unknown 0:49
I'ma give I'ma give you. And it's it's because I see you so much. Yeah. You know the the longer you see somebody so much they start to look older? Dude.
Bert Kreischer 1:00
Is that what's happening with mirrors? Yeah. Cause I I saw a picture, I saw a and we can definitely lower the AC in here for you fucking idiots growing spores. Jesus Christ. Do you ever notice how hot it is in here?
Unknown 1:11
Uh I try not to think about it. For real?

How do the hosts turn the conversation into a celebrity‑age guessing game?

Unknown 1:13
You don't think with your body, you just gotta think with your mind.
Unknown 1:21
Wow. Yeah. I think with my body. Yeah, I see. I You've been thinking with your body your whole career. That's your thing. Look, you came here, you got your titties out, right? I've I think with my body. Yeah. Yeah, I think But your body has gotten you far. You're the only person I could say that's got like this. Like the I'm trying to say it like in the best way. But you got like a The sex appeal that nobody wants. But you d made so much money off of you just being you and they love it. So it's like you like you accept who you are, so you it's it's a great idea. Like I'm like White Drewski. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.
Bert Kreischer 2:05
Yeah, he says it's got you for the skit. It's funny because Drewski is like someone who can fall and really hurt himself. Yeah. And laugh it off. And you know he's walking into the other room going, No, I think I fucked my hip up. Yeah, yeah, yeah. But it's it's for the joke. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Fuck. Your whole generation, I think, is so fun for me. Like your your whole like I think there it's uh it's funny because you forget how old fuckers are. Yeah. Like, yeah, like Tom's I think Tom's forty seven. Mm-hmm. Theo's forty five. How old? Theo is like forty five. Yeah. You he th he looks he well No, Theo is not forty five. A hundred percent. Google it. How old's Theo Vaughn? Theo Vaughn's been in the game for a minute.
Bert Kreischer 2:46
Yeah, he's forty five.
Unknown 2:47
No, he's not.
Bert Kreischer 2:48
Yeah, he is. He he actually he's thirty two. Know Theo for twenty years.
Matt Chandler 3:02
Yeah.
Unknown 3:05
This is hysterical. How old is he? I wish I had his new number. I will call him. I have his new number. Can you call him? He's really 45. How old did you think he was? Not that like this. He's about to be pissy. But it's okay to be fifty. No, it's it's okay. It's a catfish, cause It's a catfish. You're close with deal. You were dealing with friends. He's forty five? Yeah. I think the world don't
Bert Kreischer 3:39
know that. No, I don't think the world knows that. I don't think he yeah, I don't I mean Well I think he goes out and tells people his age, but I there he doesn't hide it. He's been in the media for His entire life. Yeah.
Unknown 3:53
So is freaking Orlando Brown. He's not forty five. Who who
Bert Kreischer 3:56
who's Orlando Brown? Orlando Brown, the guy that sold sprites?
Unknown 4:00
No, that's from
Bert Kreischer 4:00
Disney Channel. That's a Raven. Who's or who am I thinking of? Orlando? No? Yeah. Orlando Brown's thirty seven. How old's Chris Brown? How old's Chris Brown? Chris Brown's 36? Wow, I did
Unknown 4:14
not know that. Shut the fuck up.
Bert Kreischer 4:17
I'm blown away that you thought Theo was you thought Theo was Chris Brown is sexy though. Who? Chris Brown? Yeah. Chris Brown's so talented. Yeah.
Unknown 4:23
Oh sexy too, right? Yeah, I think so.
Bert Kreischer 4:26
Yeah.
Unknown 4:26
Yeah.
Bert Kreischer 4:27
Yeah.
Unknown 4:28
Uh what else age? Let's see this is a guess of AIDS. Let's see somebody else that was. How
Bert Kreischer 4:32
d how old do you think Rogan is?
Unknown 4:33
Ooh, Steph Rogan.
Bert Kreischer 4:35
No, Joe. Oh draw okay. Theo's older than J Seth Rogan. Fifty eight, sixty? He's almost sixty, yeah.
Unknown 4:49
Do you think the more money you get, it helps you like not look old? Yeah, I
Bert Kreischer 4:52
think so. Yeah. How much m do you think I have more money?

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