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Chapter 1: What is the main topic discussed in this episode?
Welcome, welcome, welcome to Armchair Anonymous. I'm Dan Shepard. I'm joined by Lily Padman.
Hi.
Today we have funny pregnancy stories.
Pregnancy can go all kinds of ways.
Chapter 2: What funny pregnancy stories are shared in this episode?
It really can. You know, we often get gifted evacs and our other prompts. And anytime that happens, I'm just grateful. That's right. The universe is smiling on us. Yes. Please enjoy funny pregnancy stories.
Chapter 3: How do pregnancy experiences differ among women?
Hard times come and go. I'm slow
Can you hear us?
I thought this could be a prank. I'm like, maybe it's not.
It might yet still be.
AI is pretty powerful.
Maybe a loved one coordinated something and there's going to be a pop out.
That would be extra special.
What fake name do you want?
Okay, I'm gonna use Mackenzie. I don't think I look like a Mackenzie, but I'll tie it in later why I chose that name.
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Chapter 4: What humorous incident happened during the pregnancy test?
You're not Googling stuff in the back like, you know. So he's doing the exam. Monica, I'm sure you've experienced this exam. You're wearing that super cool front open shirt thing.
Yeah.
And he's feeling these spots and he's like, huh, this is interesting. I'm like, oh my gosh, I'm so scared. And he starts to feel one of the spots and he goes, oh my gosh. And I'm like, what? He goes, it's a nipple.
No, wait, what?
I know. My sister was like, Dax is going to have a lot of follow-ups on this. But here's what he does. Instead of being like, okay, honey, you're all right. You appear to have grown an extra nipple in pregnancy. He goes, oh my gosh, I've never seen this. What? In all my years. And squeezes it and milk comes out.
It's lactating.
I've heard about this because there's like breast tissue that goes up into your armpits. Oh, I'm so glad it's not cancer. And then I'm like, what is happening? He runs out into the hallway. He's like, I got to get someone else to see this. So the other doctors are coming in marveling at it. Oh, my gosh. You're right. It does produce milk. And I'm like, what do I
Well, they've heard about this medically and they haven't seen it and they are pumped.
This is an episode of Friends, Ross's thing.
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Chapter 5: How did the pregnancy story unfold during labor?
These could be up and down your arm. That's comforting. But my next thought would be, okay, so how do we remove them? Were you thinking like, oh, I'm going to get these removed?
Yes. I was like, so what do I do? And she was like, honey, I'd just leave it. I was like, well, I don't want to.
Can you see it?
Yeah, you can. OK, it's right there. Oh, you see it?
Yeah, it's cute, though. It looks like an ingrown hair.
Yeah, it just looks like a teeny tiny bump. I'm not pregnant or nursing right now, so there's no swelling with it. But you could still just think it's like arm fat that everybody has. Yeah. I actually recently went back to the doctor and she was like, we can remove it. I was kind of worried about scarring because I'm like, is it worse to have a scar or to have a nipple?
I mean, these are the deep, hard-hitting questions. I had a consult with a plastic surgeon, which turned into a whole thing. It was on the phone with them for 30 minutes. They didn't understand. I was like, just trying to get the extra nipples removed.
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Chapter 6: What unexpected events occurred during the hospital visit?
They were like, well, honey, how do you feel about your breasts right now? Oh, God.
Trying to upsell you a little bit?
A hundred percent. I was It's like, well, I mean, I've nursed three babies.
Who does feel good after that? The doctors in this story suck. Minus that one lady.
Yes. She's like, I got you down for a fat transfer and we're going to remove. I'm like, no, no, no.
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Chapter 7: How did the birth experience become a comical situation?
I'm literally just trying to remove. I didn't want to make her feel bad because it's her job. And I'm like, well, duh, like everyone goes here to do this. So anyways, I will get the surgery at some point. Logistically, I need to find a time when I can actually do that because I have three young kids.
For the listener, I want to say, because my mind immediately went to, you also had two new areolas. That's not the case.
No. It's a teeny, tiny bump.
And it's still all skin colored.
Yeah.
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Chapter 8: What challenges did the mother face during delivery?
I told my sister, I was like, Dax is going to ask about areolas. I know it.
Well, I think when you hear nipple, you're associated immediately with an areola.
You think of the whole thing.
The whole package. Super nuts.
Maybe it's a cautionary tale. You too may have a nipple and not know it. I probably do.
Yeah, I mean, it looks like when I've had a clogged hair follicle in my armpit and then I wrench on that as if it's a normal pimple.
It just looks like a little skin tag.
What did your husband have to say about it? I mean, that's great. He signed up for two boobs and he got four.
Yeah, does he ever suck on it? You don't have to answer that. You don't have to answer that. Just laughing. I told him I have so many funny stories. I'm one of those people that just bizarre things happen to me. So I'll always be like, I've got a prompt. And then I told him I was like, oh, my gosh, I got selected for Armchair Anonymous. He's like, what story is it? I was like, it's the nipples.
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